importance of being yourself essay

The Importance of Being Yourself

From early in life, we might think we need to pretend to be a certain way in order to be accepted, a lack of authenticity can make it hard to create fulfilling, intimate relationships, therapist emma azzopardi offers four ways to be yourself.

‘Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.’ ~ Oscar Wilde

In a world where we are told that we can be anything we want to be, we cannot be anyone that we want to be. You can be a writer, an artist or an astronaut but you have no choice but to be yourself. Maybe I should say that this is the only wise choice. You cannot pretend to be someone or something that you are not, plenty of people try but they ultimately fail. If you do succeed, you certainly won’t be happy

I have come across a fair few people making their way through life by pretending. Maybe it is easier to convince ourselves that we feel good about something or someone rather than admit that we do not. Contentment doesn’t require action so by convincing ourselves that we are happy even when we are not, we may be able to avoid making those difficult decisions. We don’t have to tell our partner that we aren’t in love with them anymore or that we aren’t happy in our relationship. We don’t have to swallow our pride and ask for help when we need it because, hey, everything is just fine! We can simply smile and keep pretending. Pretending everything is fine means not having to contend with all the fears and the potential of disapproval from loved ones if we leave it behind. Pretending is costly because we may be giving away our peace of mind and happiness. 

Why is it difficult to be ourselves?

From the time we were young, we may have been taught that we are not enough as we are . People would not accept us the way we are. They wanted us to think, look and behave in different ways. It is fundamental human desire for connection and social relationships because we are, at our core, relational beings. Many of us chose to compromise, afraid that we would otherwise be left alone, isolated and helpless.

So we had to find ways to convince those around us that we are worth their friendship and act in certain ways to please others. In other words, we had to pretend. We may have learnt to cover ourselves well with the veil of pretence. As adults, we may have a dozen masks to hand. Behind every mask lies a deep-rooted fear: the fear to express yourself and reveal to others who you truly are. When we blend in and try to be what we think others want, our life doesn’t feel very satisfactory because, well, it’s not our life. It’s based on a fake version of us.

Do we really have to ask ourselves whether we’re happy? The truth is, something inside of us already knows the answer if we have to ask the question in the first place. When we’re genuinely happy, we know. When we are not, we know that, too. Exposing our true selves, fully embracing our deepest desires, and facing our fears requires a tremendous amount of courage. Many of us have been trying to please others for such a long time, that we may have forgotten who we are and what is truly important to us. We have forgotten how to express ourselves, to be spontaneous and to recognise what we truly enjoy doing.

The importance of authenticity in relationships

In thinking about your own life: Are your relationships genuine? Do you feel confident? Do you feel secure? Are you relaxed? For a significant amount of people, the answer to all these questions is ‘no.” We may pretend because deep down we feel empty and lonely. We pretend because we don’t feel enough as we are. If even you don’t appreciate yourself, how can you expect others to appreciate you? When we pretend, our relationships become shallow and empty. There cannot be any sincere communication in relationships built around pretending. The pretender begins by conjuring up the desired feelings or style in an attempt to assuage insecurities. It is common to talk about how we sometimes manipulate others, but the person one most often manipulates oneself. The trap that the Pretender falls into is that they try too hard to control their experience. Feelings and even identities are forced, instead of letting things happen in their own way. Intimacy is lost. 

Imagine putting all of the energy we use in pretending into cultivating ourselves and creating something better of our being. Imagine dropping our pretence to build honest and healthy relationships. So how do we stop pretending?

• Don’t imitate. Everyone is different and so, to copy another’s way of life simply means to suppress who you really are. Create your own path and enjoy walking it.
• Speak the truth. Be honest with yourself and with those you come in contact. When we lie, we out ourselves in constant anxiety because each lie must be covered up by another lie, and so on and so forth.. Being honest is the best way to be at peace with you and with others.
• Find peace in being alone. It is better to be alone and confident in who you are, than to be in the company of others by lying out of fear. Only once you have overridden the fear of being alone, will you be able to let go of the need for social approval. This will allow you to build genuine relationships.
• Do what you love. No matter what others expect from you, try not to compromise your way of life. Whatever you enjoy doing, keep on doing it. 

The only way to really connect with others on a meaningful level is to let them see who we are and to share our experience and what makes us tick. Not everyone will like it and that is okay. It really is. We increase our self worth not by being what others want us to be, but by being true to ourselves. If this feels like a struggle at the moment, talking to a therapist can help in building confidence and in rediscovering who you really are.

Before I sign off, if there’s one lesson I’d like to share from my experience, it’s this: You don’t need to have it together all the time.  You don’t need to be fixed because you are beautifully flawed. We all are. Emotions are neither good or bad and in fact, most people actually appreciate and admire when we share them. Some of the more tender moments that I can remember in my life were when people told me how beautiful I was, not in spite of my feelings but because of them.

Further reading

Co-dependency, authenticity, and saying no, what does being authentic really mean, how negative self-talk affects relationships, who am i, and why does it matter, why self-compassion is the key to success, find welldoing therapists near you, related articles, recent posts.

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Why Self-Confidence Is More Important Than You Think

Self-confidence is linked to almost every element involved in a happy life..

Posted September 20, 2018 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

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Self-confidence is linked to almost every element involved in a happy and fulfilling life. I highlight five key rewards of self-confidence below. Understanding these benefits is an important first step toward living your best life with confidence.

Less Fear and Anxiety

The more confident you become, the more you’ll be able to calm the voice inside you that says, “I can’t do it.” You’ll be able to unhook from your thoughts and take action in line with your values.

If you’ve suffered from low self-confidence, you’re probably familiar with rumination, or the tendency to mull over worries and perceived mistakes, replaying them ad nauseam. Excessive rumination is linked to both anxiety and depression , and it can make us withdraw from the world. But by filling up your tank with confidence, you’ll be able to break the cycle of over-thinking and quiet your inner critic .

Greater Motivation

Building confidence means taking small steps that leave a lasting sense of accomplishment. If you’ve ever learned a language, mastered a skill, reached a fitness goal, or otherwise overcome setbacks to get to where you wanted to be, you’re well on your way.

You might be thinking, “Well, sure, I was proud of my ‘A’ in Calculus back in high school, but what does that have to do with anything now?” If you think back to a key accomplishment in your life, you’ll likely find that it took a lot of perseverance. If you could triumph through adversity then, you can do it in other areas of your life where you feel self-doubt.

As your confidence grows, you’ll find yourself more driven to stretch your abilities. “What-if” thoughts will still arise: “What if I fail?” “What if I embarrass myself?” But with self-assurance, those thoughts will no longer be paralyzing. Instead, you’ll be able to grin and act anyway, feeling energized by your progress in pursuing goals that mean something to you.

More Resilience

Confidence gives you the skills and coping methods to handle setbacks and failure. Self-confidence doesn’t mean you won’t sometimes fail. But you’ll know you can handle challenges and not be crippled by them. Even when things don’t turn out anywhere close to what you planned, you’ll be able to avoid beating yourself up.

As you keep pushing yourself to try new things, you’ll start to truly understand how failure and mistakes lead to growth. An acceptance that failure is part of life will start to take root. Paradoxically, by being more willing to fail, you'll actually succeed more — because you're not waiting for everything to be 100 percent perfect before you act. Taking more shots will mean making more of them.

Improved Relationships

It might seem counterintuitive, but when you have more self-confidence, you’re less focused on yourself. We’ve all been guilty of walking into a room and thinking, “They’re all looking at me. They all think I look dumpy and that every word I say is stupid.” The truth is, people are wrapped up in their own thoughts and worries. When you get out of your own head, you’ll be able to genuinely engage with others.

You'll enjoy your interactions more because you won't be so worried about the kind of impression you're making, and you won’t be comparing yourself to others. Your relaxed state will put others at ease as well, helping you forge deeper connections.

Self-confidence can also breed deeper empathy. When you’re fully present, you’re more likely to notice that your date seems to be a little down, or that a friend in the corner looks like she needs a shoulder to cry on. When you’re not preoccupied with your own self-doubt, you can be the person who reaches out to help others.

Stronger Sense of Your Authentic Self

Finally, confidence roots you in who you really are. You’ll be able to accept your weaknesses, knowing they don’t change your self-worth. You'll also be able to celebrate your strengths and use them more fully.

Your actions will be in line with your principles, giving you a greater sense of purpose. You'll know who you are and what you stand for. You’ll have the skills to show up, stand up, and speak up. In other words, you'll be able to let your best self shine through.

A Few Action Steps

• Write down a favorite confidence quote and put it somewhere you'll see it often. My colleague Meg Selig has compiled a great list.
• Do you have a photograph of a time you felt confident and successful? It could be a graduation photo, a picture of you as a kid after you learned to ride a bike or anything else that resonates with you. Hang it on your fridge or bathroom mirror, and reflect on all the steps it took to get to that point.
• Try one of these self-confidence tricks from my colleague Alice Boyes.

Excerpt from The Self-Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem . Copyright © 2018 by Barbara Markway and Celia Ampel.

Barbara Markway, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist with over 20 years of experience. She is the author of four psychology books and has been featured in media nationwide.

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At any moment, someone’s aggravating behavior or our own bad luck can set us off on an emotional spiral that threatens to derail our entire day. Here’s how we can face our triggers with less reactivity so that we can get on with our lives.

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The Importance of Being Yourself (According to Experts)

At some point in your life, you’ve probably been told to be yourself. It’s one of those things that seems easy enough to do but isn’t always so simple in practice.

So what does it actually mean to be yourself? And more importantly, why is it important?

According to experts, the following are reasons why being yourself is important.

Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, M.Ed.

Psychotherapist | Author, “ Words to Eat By “

So we don’t miss out on being loved for our imperfect selves

Although it’s hard to argue with these quotes, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind” and “Be yourself, everyone else is taken” (attributed to Bernard M. Baruch and Oscar Wilde respectively), many of our clients are terrified of being themselves.

Worse, they don’t even know who they really are.

Why are people not totally themselves?

People fear that there’s something defective and unlovable about themselves, so they try to match their outward appearance and reactions to what they think is acceptable.

A client of mine who’s learning to share anger just started dating a woman who won’t cry in front of him. Both are always putting their best foot forward and hiding their true feelings.

Each fears that expressing authenticity—in one case anger and the other vulnerability—is the way to avoid rejection or abandonment.

Related: How to Be Vulnerable in a Relationship (According to Experts)

How do people learn not to be themselves?

We learn to be who we are, or in the case of the above couple, to not be who we are in our first relationships.

I was once in a department store dressing room, and a toddler in the next stall was angrily telling his mother he wanted to go home. Bracing for a scolding from her, I was delighted to hear her say, “I know you’re angry at Mommy for taking such a long time. I don’t blame you. It’s okay. We’re going home soon.”

My hunch is that this little boy grew up with his authentic feelings intact, whatever they turned out to be.

When parents scold or shame us for expressing true feelings, we learn to hide them.

When they insist we don’t feel a certain way—sad, mad, disappointed, unappreciative—we think we’re being bad and convince ourselves there’s something wrong with us if we do.

When they regularly tell us what we should or must feel happy/grateful/fine, we push ourselves to be that way to get their approval or avoid their disapproval, and we don’t get to enjoy or express a full range of emotions.

We hold onto what we’re told is okay, and other emotions become taboo. This persona is what British psychoanalyst Donald Winnicut called the false self.

Another way we learn to hold back parts of ourselves is if this dynamic is modeled at home. Whenever I hear a client say, “Oh, my parents never fought,” I wonder how any child of theirs could learn how to disagree or stand up for themselves.

If stereotypically, Mom was always bright and cheery even when she had reason not to be, and Dad wore himself out being the go-to guy who never needed anything from anyone, we learn wrongly that this is how men and women—and couples—should be.

What happens when we’re inauthentic in adulthood?

For one thing, we miss out on intimacy, which only comes from two authentic selves connecting with each other.

As the saying goes, “we bond in the trenches,” which means people form true, loving attachments when they let down their guards and share their deepest feelings.

For another, when we’re afraid to be ourselves, we lose out on bonding with others who are similarly flawed, but we never know it and feel alone.

We miss out on being cared for if we’re always strong, comforted if we’re always fine, and being able to comfortably rely on others when we don’t seek or accept help.

Moreover, we miss out on being loved for our imperfect selves, which lifts our shame, reduces perfectionism, and raises our self-confidence .

People who have difficulty being themselves around others are often anxious about being hurt and suffer from what therapists call being well-defended: they may not get hurt, but they also don’t experience the joys of loving attachments.

How can people learn to be themselves?

The only way they can become authentic is to understand why they haven’t been able to be and to let their true natures and feelings surface slowly.

One of my clients did this by telling her family she was bisexual. Another client told her father that she did not want to be a dentist. A third stood up to her mother’s complaints about her housekeeping.

There are endless ways to say what you mean and mean what you say.

It’s crucial to remember that not everyone will like us when we reveal our true feelings.

In fact, as I tell my clients if parents, spouses, lovers, colleagues, kids, and friends start to get more upset at you, you’re probably on the right track to expressing yourself more honestly.

Alternately, healthy people will be delighted that you’re being more real and love and value you more for exactly the things you’ve been afraid to be.

Robyn Cullen

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist | Founder, The Wild Grace Collective

They’re going to judge you — so be you

We’re so worried about just being our truest expression of our selves out of fear that others will judge us. Well, rest assured — they will.

No matter how you act, who you are, what your life circumstances are, or what you’re wearing …. you will be judged.

So, why not let them see the authentic you so that their judgments (which are only a reflection of who they are and the lens through which they see the world, not just you) can, at the very least, be in response to authenticity?

Instead of letting the fear of judgment stop you from being you, I invite you to accept the idea of being judged as a part of being a human being and interacting with other human beings.

And then check how you judge others … maybe there’s space to soften a bit.

You’re already one of the cool kids

Look, we all want to fit in somewhere. Belong in a community where we feel accepted, loved, celebrated, seen, and totally one of the cool kids.

So what if I told you that you, my dear, yes you reading this right now, totally are already one of the cool kids? If you’re rolling your eyes or thinking through all the proof that there’s no way you’re cool in any group… consider this.

What if you’ve been showing up, not really being who you are — not letting the world see you and all the things that make you glorious and cool AF?

• How you geek out on your exotic tea collection when you’re alone.
• How you and your buddies laugh way too hard at Rick and Morty… still. How you light up when you walk into the office supplies section at Target.
• How you get chills and tear up when certain songs come on the radio.
• How, no matter what, you refuse to watch Game of Thrones, get on TikTok, or wear those hideous high-waisted jeans. (barf)

All the things that make you, you, my dear, are the exact things that a group of people out there are searching for in their community.

So go on — fly your flag of authenticity so your people can find you and finally enjoy (your birthright of) sitting at the cool kids’ table — your table.

Being someone else is exhausting

The older I get, the more I realize how precious my energy is. Most people worry about wasting time, but I worry about wasting energy.

It’s true we never know how much time we have on this planet, but what we do know is that we get to choose how we spend it.

We get to choose where to put our energy. What relationships to put energy into. What careers to put energy into. What hobbies, social justice organizations, environmental issues, political events, social events … you name it.

For the most part, we get to choose where to put our energy. So why not put it into things that light us up? That energizes us? That inspires us? That fills us with love? That motivates us?

Putting our energy into things that aren’t truly life-giving, and we’re just doing it to appear a certain way, will drain all your precious energy. Being someone other than who you truly are, is exhausting.

And with an uncertain amount of time on this planet, don’t you want to experience it fully alert, enlivened, and fully you?

Christine Olsen, MSW, RSW

Registered Social Worker and Psychotherapist

When you’re not yourself, you’re sending a message that you’re unlovable

When you are not yourself, you are sending a message. You are saying who you are and what you have to offer are not enough or unlovable. This is different from wanting the people we have relationships with to be happy and adjusting behavior to be a better partner, friend, or co-worker. 

Wanting to please others is natural and normal; it’s when you are pretending to be different solely for their approval that it becomes an issue. 

When we are not ourselves, there is likely an underlying belief that who you are is not enough, not loveable, unworthy of connection or success; otherwise, why pretend? 

Pretending is enacted for protection when you want to shield yourself from the inevitable rejection that you expect yourself to experience when putting yourself out there. The pain of rejection may feel earth-shattering for you. 

On the other hand, someone else may feel the sting of rejection and feeling of disappointment or sadness but know that not everyone is going to like or love you, and that would literally be impossible. 

Acting as someone else is understandably appealing in another way. It allows you to avoid it. 

You get to go over it, under it, or around it and not have to go through it. You avoid anything that will bring you unsteadiness and trigger further feelings of unworthiness. 

It’s like when someone is more comfortable in the chaos because it is what they know, even though they know it is not good for them. The alternative of change is scary and feels unsafe. Burying your head in the sand will not get you what you want in the long term, though. 

Here is what you can have when you show up in the world as yourself:

You feel at greater ease when you are being yourself

Not being yourself is mentally and emotionally exhausting . It is tiresome to constantly have to adapt to the person or situation in order to find just the right formula for being liked or accepted. 

Imagine the lightness of walking in a room like you? This is what I think, believe, and value and my actions match. No adjustments. Take it or leave it.

You also get to enjoy your leisure time. You do the activities that you actually like. To be clear, you can do activities because a spouse or friend enjoys them, and you want to support or spend time with them. 

This is different from pretending you love this activity and buying all new snowboarding gear hoping this will gain their love or approval. 

When you are yourself, you decipher what is enjoyable versus what is what I am supposed to enjoy. Being yourself means enjoying your life with people you actually like.

Your relationships should not solely be based on whether they accept or like you.  Think about whether you like them also. Think about how at ease you feel in their presence. 

Your self-esteem and worth aren’t solely attached to external things

When you know who you are and are true to that in all spaces, the hard stuff life inevitably throws at you hits differently. It is the equivalent of living in a straw house vs. a brick house. 

Your self-esteem and worth are not solely attached to external things like your job, relationships, or money. This is because to be yourself, you have to have to accept yourself and if I dare say: like yourself.

It makes you appear more attractive

This isn’t about looks. It is about how you can sniff out someone who is inauthentic. If you feel someone is sucking up to you, pretending to like something they don’t, or hiding their true feelings, but their face is still showing it, it is repelling. 

When someone is 100% their unique self, you want to know more, to be their friend, to hire them, or to take them on a date. 

Further, the connections you make with others when being yourself are deeper and more intimate. 

You can start taking little steps towards being yourself.  Try:

• Speaking up more . For example, let the barista know your coffee order was wrong.
• Expressing yourself emotionally . For example, “I am feeling uncomfortable right now.”
• Expressing yourself visually . For example, wearing the weird shirt, you like.
• Delaying decision-making . For example, saying, “I’m going to think about that and get back to you,” rather than immediately saying yes.
• Figuring out what you like . For example, try a drop-in yoga class.
• Countering negative self-talk . For example, for all the times you notice something you did wrong, practice identifying something you do well.

Remember:  Some people hate pickles. Others love them and cannot fathom how you can reject this mouth-watering snack. It is a preference, and so are you.

Dr. Harold Hong

Board-Certified Psychiatrist, New Waters Recovery

Pretending to be someone else can damage your mental and emotional health

The authenticity of your character is an essential quality that will define how successful you are in life. It is easy to put on a persona that you think other people want to see.

You may think that this will make you more likable or help you get ahead somehow. However, this false persona will become tiresome and difficult to maintain over time. And you risk confusing yourself about who you really are.

Being you means being honest about your thoughts, feelings, and desires, even if that means being different from other people. Pretending to be someone you’re not can damage your mental and emotional health in several ways.

It can cause you to doubt your worthiness and value

If you’re constantly putting on a persona that you think other people will find more appealing, it’s easy to lose sight of your unique qualities. This can lead to feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem, affecting your personal and professional life.

It can be exhausting

Maintaining a persona requires a lot of energy and effort.

For instance, you might have to suppress your true feelings in order to keep up the pretense. This can lead to frustration and even anxiety or depression, finding yourself feeling angry, resentful, and disconnected from the people around you.

When you’re not being authentic, you’re not really living

You’re missing out on opportunities to grow and connect with others.

When you’re not being authentic, people cannot truly know and understand you, making it difficult to find those who accept and love you for who you are.

You may also find that your relationships are superficial and unfulfilling. For example, you might find yourself in a relationship with someone who only likes the persona you’ve created, not the real you.

And once they discover the truth, they may feel betrayed and end the relationship.

What are some ways you can start being your authentic self?

• Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings

What do you think and feel about the people and things around you? When you’re honest with yourself, it will be easier, to be honest with others.

• Express your thoughts and feelings openly

This doesn’t mean you must share everything about yourself with everyone you meet. But it does mean being genuine in your interactions and sharing as much of yourself as you feel comfortable doing.

If you only behave in ways you think are acceptable, you rob yourself of self-expression.

• Start making choices that reflect your true values and preferences

No one will live your life for you, so you might as well make choices that will make you happy. If you’re unsure what your values are, think about the things that are important to you and that make you feel good.

When you start making choices that reflect your authentic self, you’ll find your life more fulfilling and satisfying.

Rachel Davidson, MA, LPC-A

Licensed Professional Counselor Associate,  Malaty Therapy

To live the truth according to our own values

Why live authentically.

Being yourself means living authentically. When we live authentically, we live our truth according to our own values.

So often, we make decisions based on what is considered normal in society or what others want from us. We get into the habit of making others happy rather than listening to what we want and need.

Over time, it can become difficult to differentiate our own values from others, and we can start to neglect ourselves in favor of others.

It might seem easy to go with the flow, but over time this can wear us down, resulting in anxiety, depression, and mental fatigue.

Values and Authenticity

When we’ve spent so much time putting the needs of others before our own, it can be hard to determine what is most important to us.

A good starting point is to make a list of the things that bring us joy. These can be things like family, friends, productivity, nature, spirituality, and education. We can then clarify our values by ranking them in order of importance.

As we do this, it can be helpful to check in with ourselves to ask whether we are choosing what is important based on what we feel in our heart rather than what we think would be viewed favorably by others.

Once we have a list of our most important values, the next step is to determine whether the life we are living is consistent with what we care about most.

For example, after doing the values clarification, you may recognize that honesty is a top value of yours. If the way you are living involves lying or cheating, your lifestyle is at odds with one of your significant values. In this way, you are living inauthentically.

These inconsistencies between the way we want to live and the way we are actually living can lead us to feel uneasy, anxious, and unhappy with our lives.

How to start living according to your values

Beginning to live according to our values can be a challenging task when it’s not what we’re used to. Start by making small changes to habits and actions in ways that contribute to closing the gap between your lived and aspirational values.

When we live according to our values, we are able to truly be ourselves. We can then be proud of our actions and know we are doing our best to care for our mental health and well-being.

When we live our truth, we are able to show up most effectively for ourselves and for those we care for.

Mayra Diaz, LMFT

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Myra Diaz Therapy | Author, “ The Panic Attack Relief Workbook “

Being yourself is important for a few different reasons. Living inauthentically can lead to mental and emotional suffering.

To not experience Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance is the discomfort that happens when our attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors are in conflict. When we lie, hide parts of ourselves, or act differently than our true values or beliefs, it actually hurts us.

Cognitive dissonance also usually leads to a change in our behaviors or beliefs so that we can resolve that discomfort.

So, if you are not being yourself to fit in, your behaviors or beliefs might change in ways you never intended. You may become a version of yourself that you don’t want to be.

To avoid being in a constant state of anxiety

Anxiety is the feeling we experience when we anticipate a threat is coming. If we are not being ourselves, that means we are likely in a constant state of anxiety because we live in fear of being “found out.”

This would make it hard to relax, unwind, and recharge. This could also lead to avoiding things we do care about because we feel like imposters.

Being yourself allows you to be honest about your emotions

Our emotions are messages we are intended to hear. Sometimes they can be based on misinterpretations, but it doesn’t benefit us to ignore them, even if they are. Repressing our emotions doesn’t make them go away. Instead, it usually leads to those feelings rebounding or creeping up in other areas.

Being yourself allows you to be honest about your emotions, which in turn helps you better cope with them.

Emotional vulnerability is also the way we make deeper connections. If you hide who you are and how you feel, you will probably feel lonelier. Being authentic about who you are is how you find the people who you really belong with.

That sense of belonging is essential to our well-being.

Andrea Gharritt, MPH, RDN, LDN, CLC, CIEC

Certified Life Coach, Registered & Licensed Dietitian and Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor | Founder, The Bold Life Design

It is the most important thing you can do for your health

At the core of all humans is the deep need for security, dignity, and belonging.

So many people, in order to try to get these needs met, put on masks and armor, ready to perform, day-in and day-out. All of this performance takes a massive toll on our:

• Self-esteem

Have you ever seen someone crumble under the weight of a secret only to become a lighter, happier version of themselves after telling the truth, their truth?

That’s because even when the consequences of letting go of a secret are severe, on the other side of the rumble, the choice to be honest with yourself and others about who you are results in deep relief and healing.

Being yourself, honoring your unique gifts and talents, and celebrating your weirdness, is at the root of true health and well-being.

That’s why, as a food and body peace dietitian, before we ever talk about food and how you take care of your body, we talk about who you are, what lights you up, and what mountains you want to move.

Until you are in true alignment with yourself, all the self-care habits and behaviors in the world aren’t going to be truly impactful and sustaining.

But being yourself in a world where everyone is trying to fit in, one-up, or showcase their #bestlife, can be a challenge.

Give yourself permission to show up as yourself and advocate for your wants and needs unapologetically

Step one is to give yourself permission to show up as yourself and advocate for your wants and needs unapologetically. This kind of courage is a muscle that we can train and flex.

Start small with something that feels doable, whether it’s wearing something that expresses your personality or simply choosing what you really want to order at a restaurant (instead of what everyone else is having).

Continue to build self-trust and confidence by exercising this muscle of permission and courage, looking for opportunities to flex bigger.

Over time, being yourself in profound ways — like vocalizing your opinion at a meeting, taking a public stance on an issue that’s important to you, or having a hard conversation with a friend or family about your boundaries — won’t feel so daunting.

There still may be fear, but the self-trust you have cultivated will give you the courage to feel the fear and move forward anyway.

Tara M. Pope, MA, TLLP

Psychotherapist | Owner, Total Mind Psychology

Suppressing aspects of ourselves leads to emotional and mental health issues

What do you think of when someone tells you to be yourself? We are complex and multidimensional human beings, and we express various aspects of ourselves in many different environments.

Within these various aspects, we should be able to express the true essence of who we are.

However, there are some individuals that may have difficulty expressing the authentic parts of themselves. This leads to emotional and mental health issues that are a result of suppressing aspects of ourselves.

Signs that you are not being yourself

Experiences that cause individuals to be inauthentic may stem from childhood and past encounters where they have felt rejected or missed the opportunities to develop and identify authentic aspects of themselves.

These individuals may present with behaviors such as:

• Suppressing their emotions and opinions.
• Difficulties with setting boundaries with others.
• Difficulties trusting their own decisions.
• Seeking validation solely from others .
• Lack of awareness of their own unhealthy behaviors.
• Difficulties recognizing the need to change and grow.

These behaviors can lead to symptoms of anxiety and depression, causing difficulties within relationships and daily functioning.

How to be yourself

The ways you may express yourself can vary, depending on the context of your environment. Your true self may present differently when you are at work compared to when you are spending time with close friends.

Related: How to Be True to Yourself

Even if you need to present different aspects of yourself in different contexts, this does not mean that you have to suppress your true self.

Here are a few steps to take toward being your true self:

• Become more aware of your unhealthy behaviors and inauthentic traits that have been interfering with your relationships and mental health.
• Talk to a mental health clinician to get to the root of why you have not been expressing your true self.
• Work on discovering your values and personal goals for change.

Remember that it is not an easy task to change behaviors that we have maintained for years. But, once you are able to identify the parts of you that are true and the parts that you want to change, it will only lead to a more authentic life of being yourself.

John G. Cottone, PhD

Licensed Psychologist, Choosing Therapy

Being yourself helps you settle into more consistent ways of relating with people

Halloween is a time when we bask in the fun of being someone else. We dress up, wear masks, and try on myriad alter egos that lie at varying distances from our core personalities.

Part of the fun is that we can experiment with different ways of thinking and talking, and ultimately we can learn something about ourselves and the people we imitate.

But Halloween is only fun if it stands in contrast to the consistent personality we’ve come to embody, which those around us know and love.

For some people, though, Halloween is an everyday experience, especially for those that don’t like who they are or are still trying to figure it out.

Adolescents, in particular, are in a continuous state of flux, trying on new identities as they work to determine who they might be and who they want to become.

When we reach adulthood, however, after having developed a consistent identity, mental wellness increasingly depends on our ability to be ourselves across situations, even when this may pose challenges for us.

There are several reasons why this is the case:

When we’re comfortable being ourselves, we can settle into more consistent ways of relating with people. This allows them to get a better idea of how we might react in certain situations, which can lead to more positive interactions in the future and fewer unpredictable negative interactions.

The more we’re ourselves in social situations, the more genuine we appear to others, which leads to them trusting us more and to them bonding with us.

However, when other people suspect we are wearing a mask — literally or figuratively — they close up emotionally because they’re unsure if they can trust us, and this becomes a barrier to them bonding with us.

When we show people we’re comfortable being ourselves, even in challenging social situations, it projects an air of confidence that few other behavioral expressions can project.

Nothing is more attractive than confidence. Confidence begets success, and success brings more confidence, but it all starts with being yourself.

Joni Ogle, LCSW, CSAT

Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist | CEO,  The Heights Treatment

It will bring you a sense of inner peace and happiness

Being your true, authentic self is one of the most important things you can do in your life. It allows you to be honest with yourself and others, and it helps you to stay true to your values and beliefs.

When you live in alignment with your authentic self, it becomes easier to create a life that you are truly passionate about and content with. This will bring you a sense of inner peace and happiness.

It can be challenging to be yourself in a world full of people trying to conform to societal norms and expectations. However, it is important to remember that you are unique and special and that you have something valuable to offer the world.

When you embrace your true self, you will be happier and more fulfilled. You will also be more likely to attract people who appreciate and value you for who you are.

Additionally, trying to be someone else can be mentally and emotionally exhausting.

No one can keep up a fake persona forever. At some point, the act will become too difficult to maintain, and you will likely crumble under pressure. It is far better to be yourself from the start simply.

This way, you can focus your energy on living your best life and being the best version of yourself.

Liz Clifton

Life Coach and Leadership Mentor | Founder, take34u

Being yourself is the very root of happiness

For me, there are five different areas that underpin the importance of being yourself. And together, they lead to a clear, connected, calm, loving, and confident you. In fact, I believe that being yourself is the very root of happiness.

Self-awareness

The power of being aware of who you truly deeply are is as old as time itself. But it’s something that we often forget to make time for. So if you haven’t checked in with yourself and how you’ve been feeling for a while, take just a moment right now with this simple question.

Related: How to Check In With Yourself

Ask yourself, “How do I feel right now?” Then notice whatever comes up for you.

This is a space to acknowledge your feelings as they are in the moment. There is no need for guilt or shame, fault or blame, just a neutral acknowledgment of whatever you notice.

You may hear, feel, smell, taste, or see something or, indeed, nothing at all, and whatever happens is absolutely perfect for you right now at this moment.

And if anything big comes up for you, remember to reach out for support from your support network or health professionals, as you are Never alone!

Self-connection

It takes practice to really connect with yourself, so congratulations on taking the time to get started here now. To really begin deepening your self-connection, you can ask yourself the question above at least once daily.

Next, you can go a little deeper with your journey into being yourself and connect with the natural rhythm of your breath. Take a few moments to close your eyes and feel the airflow into your body and back out again.

To strengthen your connection to yourself, try the following simple exercise:

• Breathe in for the count of one.
• And then breathe out for the count of two.

As an extra connection point, you can silently say to yourself on your breath in, “one pink elephant,” and then on your breath out, “two pink elephants, three pink elephants.”

Being aware of your physical body and breath is empowering and enables you to calm yourself easily and effortlessly. Plus, the longer out breath helps you naturally relax and slow down your heart rate and breathing just a little.

And if you repeat the words silently to yourself, you’re also listening to yourself. So you get to enjoy mental, physical, and audio connectivity with yourself.

Self-acceptance

Each of these practices will support you in increasing your self-awareness and self-connection to the real, authentic you inside, which will, in turn, gift you some personal truths to accept about yourself.

This is the time to be kind and gentle to yourself; after all, you only know what you know at this moment. So if you’re perhaps doing tired or anxious right now, you will have fewer resources available to understand what is causing you to feel how you feel. And that is absolutely ok!

You are a wonderful unique human being, and you are doing the best you can. As you explore your self-acceptance, it’s a fabulous time to connect and share what you’re feeling and noticing with others.

Whatever is happening for you at this stage in your life will also be occurring for others. Plus, others will have navigated these experiences before you.

So reach out to them for support and accountability as you enjoy your own challenges and opportunities.

The next stage after you accept yourself for who you are is to move into your self-love . This often includes some self-forgiveness and releasing of old emotional baggage.

By starting to love and treat yourself as you would a loved one, you will begin to notice that feeling of calm and joy grow stronger. Your energy across all areas of your life begins to improve as you are no longer punishing yourself for the past.

Related: How to Love Yourself When You Don’t Know How

You begin to love yourself in each moment as you notice, connect to, and accept exactly how you feel and who you are fully and completely.

Self-confidence

After all of this amazing work to truly be yourself now, you get to really enjoy it. When you have created the clear, calm, connected confidence to choose to be yourself with anyone, anywhere, at any time, you are absolutely free to be you! Something that for many of us is for the first time since we were kids.

Because if you think of it, newborn babies are absolutely happy to be themselves. They ask for what they want and need and keep asking and getting louder until they get it.

So maybe being a bit more childlike with your confidence and self-belief as you embrace the importance of being you will be beneficial!

As the truth is that you matter, and it’s absolutely time for you to:

• Stop wasting your energy trying to please everyone else, and enjoy being fully you.
• Trust yourself and follow your passion, vision, mission, and intuition. However, you refer to your inner voice, wants, and desires.
• Share your true voice easily and effortlessly and light the way for others to do the same.

So what are you waiting for? Start that daily check-in, awareness, and connection-building with yourself today. Then soon you too can completely enjoy stepping into the magnificent amazing you that you really are.

Susanne M. Alexander

Relationship and Marriage Coach & Character Specialist,  CharacterYAQ  | Author, “ Couple Vitality “

You are likely to experience happiness in a new way

I was joking with a friend this week that I thought I would know everything about myself by now, but each year and each decade brings new insights and growth.

Knowing yourself well, however, is a prerequisite for being able to relax and be yourself with others.

Knowing yourself comes from a combination of actions:

• Regular reflection on words spoken and actions taken and the effect of both on others.
• Focused attention on developing character qualities like respect, dependability, or flexibility and learning which qualities are strengths and which need growth.
• Identifying what behavior changes to make.

Who am I with others?

In addition to knowing yourself, being yourself with others requires two key elements:

• Trust that the space and interactions will be safe.
• Self-confidence and self-respect so that you can demonstrate you have value.

As you relax and put less emphasis on the opinions of others about you, and as you recognize you don’t need to place importance on the judgments of others, it becomes possible to blossom and be yourself.

When that happens, others receive the benefit of what you have to offer and wish to be around you.

Achieving integrity and wholeness

You may adopt a different persona with each role you carry out. Some of that is reasonable, as you naturally interact differently with close friends than you do with your grandparents.

What is important to notice, however, is whether you are being honest about yourself with everyone.

If you notice that you wear a mask to hide who you are, and no one actually knows you, your honesty has slipped.

Knowing yourself and allowing others to see the real you come from leads to a state of integrity and wholeness. You don’t have to try to remember what you said or how you behaved with one person versus another.

When you experience a state of integrity, where your inside self and your outside self are congruent, you are likely to experience happiness in a new way.

Melania Joy Murphy

Journalist, Behavior Analyst, and Speaker

Trying to fit into society’s expectations can send your self-worth and dignity plummeting

Women, especially, have been raised in a society that does not support authenticity. Whether it’s your hair, clothes, opinions, attitudes, or preferences, society will let you know its approval rating.

But trying to fit into society’s expectations can send your self-worth and dignity plummeting. This is notably true when becoming a wife and mother. Many people will have advice about how you should do things right , but it’s important to know yourself and be yourself to be the healthiest you.

Here are three questions you may want to ask yourself to help you get to know and honor yourself.

Do I want to ask my fiancé to take my name?

Have you considered asking your soon-to-be husband to take your name? Would you like to give your children your name?

Most women know the many married name options available today.

• Taking his name.
• Keeping her name.
• Hyphenating names.
• Repositioning names by moving their maiden name to their middle name and adding their last name.
• Creating a new name.

But most women don’t consider asking their fiancé to take her name, or if she keeps her name, giving their children her name instead of his name.

Your worth, identity, family history, and place in society are as important as the man you’re about to marry.

Thanks to the many women who’ve come before us and fought for our equal rights, there are no laws in any of the 50 states that require women to take their husbands’ names or for men to retain their names.

Of course, there is nothing wrong with wanting to give up your name and take on your husband’s name, but have you truly considered what you’d like to do and what outdated laws, traditions, or stereotypes may be holding you back?

Am I in tune with my intuition and empathy?

Intuition and empathy are natural abilities, but our society doesn’t provide a framework for us to develop them. Instead, many of us disregard these abilities and stifle their messages, which may cause physical, emotional, and societal problems. It is important to develop these abilities by being true to yourself.

For example, when we don’t listen to our intuition, we are often ignoring our emotions. Stress and anxiety may build up over time because your intuition is trying to tell you that a change needs to occur in your life.

Maybe a relationship or job is not right for you, or you really shouldn’t go on a trip, but you don’t want to change direction. Unless we acknowledge our intuition, we have no way of really knowing what is going on inside us.

Empathy is our ability to step into someone else’s shoes, be aware of their feelings and understand their needs. Honing our empathy is important for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately.

When we develop our empathy, we experience another person’s point of view, rather than just our own, and grow our helping behaviors from within, rather than being forced to act polite.

A lack of empathy can also cause people to misinterpret what other people are trying to say, which can ultimately lead to miscommunication, conflict, and damaged relationships.

What do I want?

Most women are natural caregivers and people pleasers, and society encourages us to develop those abilities, but when we give too much of ourselves, we can suffer physically and mentally.

It’s important we take the time to know what we want and honor it.

Stop and ask yourself right now, what do you want? If you’re like me, your mind goes to a list of things I should do. I should switch over the laundry. I should call my mom. I should help the kids with their homework. Or, it turns to escapes. I want a glass of wine or bowl of ice cream or to take a nap. Those are not truly what I want.

They are what society has taught me to do, and my rebellious side makes excuses not to do those things.

To find your true self, you need to go below those voices that have developed from parents, peers, and society telling you what you should want.

Start with small questions like, would I like the blue pillow, orange pillow, or whatever item it may be, and notice your thoughts.

Push away thoughts that resemble, “ Joe would prefer the orange one” or “the blue one would go better with the sofa.” Instead, feel where in your body you feel warmth and joy. That’s where your answer will be found. Then you will know what you want.

Practice this simple exercise every time you feel a pit in your stomach when you have to make a decision. Soon you’ll be able to tap into your body for answers.

After some practice, most people feel less stress and anxiety and more self-worth.

Monika Martin

Life Transformation Coach and Certified Yoga Teacher, Embody Your Flow

Being yourself is the key to happiness and success

When you are yourself, you are more in tune with your inner guidance. You are honest with yourself, so you know exactly what you want and what you need.

You make decisions that are aligned with the life that you want to live for yourself. You pick the right job. You pick the right life partner. You attract to you the people who share your values.

Moreover, you don’t make decisions because of society’s pressure.

It’s really about you following your path and defining your happiness and success. All of this makes you a happier, healthier, and better human being.

Being yourself is the best gift you can give to this world

In a toxic culture where mental and chronic illnesses keep rising, being yourself is the best gift you can give to this world.

Finding yourself and your version of happiness makes you thrive as a human being. And when people thrive, they lead by example to all the people who are around them. They show what’s possible to their family, their friends, their colleagues, and their children.

Being yourself is healing, and when you heal yourself, you also heal the world.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do i know if i am being myself.

• Gut feeling: Pay attention to your intuition. You’re likely being yourself if you feel at ease and comfortable with your actions, thoughts, and decisions.

• Consistency: Observe your behavior in different situations. If you’re consistent in your values, beliefs, and actions, you stay true to your authentic self.

• Honesty: Reflect on your thoughts and actions. Are you being honest with yourself and others? Honesty is a crucial aspect of being yourself.

• Alignment: Your actions should align with your passions, goals, and values. When you’re true to yourself, you’ll make choices that reflect what’s important to you.

• Personal growth: When you’re being yourself, you’ll experience personal growth as you learn from your experiences and adapt.

What happens when you are not being yourself?

• Stress and discomfort: Pretending to be someone you’re not can lead to feelings of stress and discomfort. You may feel like you’re wearing a mask or constantly struggling to maintain an image.

• Relationship strain: If you’re not being yourself, your relationships may suffer. Authenticity is crucial for forming deep, meaningful connections with others.

• Lack of fulfillment: When you’re not true to yourself, you may feel unfulfilled, as you’re not pursuing your passions or living according to your values.

• Identity confusion: Over time, you may lose touch with your authentic self, causing confusion about your identity, beliefs, and values.

• Stunted growth: Personal growth can be hindered when you’re not being yourself, as you may be avoiding challenges, learning opportunities, or chances to develop new skills.

What is the best way to be myself?

Being yourself is essential for a fulfilling and authentic life. To truly embrace who you are, consider these steps:

Self-discovery: • Spend time reflecting on your values, beliefs, and passions. • Identify your strengths, weaknesses, and unique qualities. • Pursue interests and hobbies that genuinely excite you.

Self-acceptance: • Embrace your imperfections and flaws. • Recognize that everyone has strengths and weaknesses. • Cultivate self-compassion and treat yourself with kindness.

Assertiveness: • Stand up for your beliefs and values, even if they differ from others. • Express your thoughts and feelings honestly and respectfully. • Practice saying “no” when something doesn’t align with your authentic self.

Surround yourself with supportive people: • Seek out friends and loved ones who appreciate your uniqueness. • Limit your exposure to toxic or unsupportive environments. • Engage in communities and groups that share your interests and values.

How can I stay true to myself in a world that pressures me to conform?

Staying true to yourself amidst external pressures can be challenging but is essential for a fulfilling life. Here are some strategies to help you stay authentic:

Strengthen your self-awareness: • Regularly check in with yourself and evaluate your emotions, thoughts, and actions • Determine if you’re living in alignment with your values and beliefs

Practice self-care: • Prioritize your mental, emotional, and physical well-being • Engage in activities that help you recharge and maintain balance

Set boundaries: • Be clear about your limits and communicate them to others • Protect your time, energy, and values by saying “no” when necessary

Find your tribe: • Seek out like-minded individuals who appreciate your authenticity • Build a support network that encourages you to stay true to yourself

Embrace your individuality: • Celebrate your unique qualities and talents • Resist the urge to compare yourself to others or seek external validation

Does being myself can make me happier?

Yes, being yourself can lead to greater happiness. Authenticity allows you to develop deeper connections with others as they engage with the real you. Living in alignment with your values brings a sense of purpose and fulfillment. 

Embracing your unique qualities fosters self-acceptance and self-love, contributing to overall well-being. When you’re true to yourself, you are more likely to pursue passions that bring joy and satisfaction.

Is it ever too late to start being yourself?

It’s never too late to start being yourself. Embracing your true self is an ongoing journey, and it’s always possible to make changes and grow. Regardless of your age or life stage, you can begin practicing self-awareness, reflecting on your values, and making choices that align with your authentic self. 

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15 Tips for Writing a College Essay About Yourself

What’s covered:.

• What is the Purpose of the College Essay?
• How to Stand Out Without Showing Off
• 15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself
• Where to Get Free Feedback on Your Essay

Most students who apply to top-tier colleges have exceptional grades, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities. How do admissions officers decide which applicants to choose among all these stellar students? One way is on the strength of their college essay .

This personal statement, along with other qualitative factors like teacher recommendations, helps the admissions committee see who you really are—the person behind the transcript. So, it’s obviously important to write a great one.

What Is the Purpose of the College Essay? 

Your college essay helps you stand out in a pool of qualified candidates. If effective, it will also show the admissions committee more of your personality and allow them to get a sense of how you’ll fit in with and contribute to the student body and institution. Additionally, it will show the school that you can express yourself persuasively and clearly in writing, which is an important part of most careers, no matter where you end up. 

Typically, students must submit a personal statement (usually the Common App essay ) along with school-specific supplements. Some students are surprised to learn that essays typically count for around 25% of your entire application at the top 250 schools. That’s an enormous chunk, especially considering that, unlike your transcript and extracurriculars, it isn’t an assessment of your entire high school career.  

The purpose of the college essay is to paint a complete picture of yourself, showing admissions committees the person behind the grades and test scores. A strong college essay shows your unique experiences, personality, perspective, interests, and values—ultimately, what makes you unique. After all, people attend college, not their grades or test scores. The college essay also provides students with a considerable amount of agency in their application, empowering them to share their own stories.

How to Stand Out Without Showing Off 

It’s important to strike a balance between exploring your achievements and demonstrating humility. Your aim should be to focus on the meaning behind the experience and how it changed your outlook, not the accomplishment itself. 

Confidence without cockiness is the key here. Don’t simply catalog your achievements, there are other areas on your application to share them. Rather, mention your achievements when they’re critical to the story you’re telling. It’s helpful to think of achievements as compliments, not highlights, of your college essay.  

Take this essay excerpt , for example:

My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go. 

Instead of saying “ I received this scholarship and participated in this prestigious program, ” the author tells a story, demonstrating their growth and initiative through specific actions (riding the train alone, applying academic programs on her own, etc.)—effectively showing rather than telling.

15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself 

1. start early .

Leave yourself plenty of time to write your college essay—it’s stressful enough to compose a compelling essay without putting yourself under a deadline. Starting early on your essay also leaves you time to edit and refine your work, have others read your work (for example, your parents or a teacher), and carefully proofread.

2. Choose a topic that’s meaningful to you 

The foundation of a great essay is selecting a topic that has real meaning for you. If you’re passionate about the subject, the reader will feel it. Alternatively, choosing a topic you think the admissions committee is looking for, but isn’t all that important to you, won’t make for a compelling essay; it will be obvious that you’re not very invested in it.

3. Show your personality 

One of the main points of your college essay is to convey your personality. Admissions officers will see your transcript and read about the awards you’ve won, but the essay will help them get to know you as a person. Make sure your personality is evident in each part—if you are a jokester, incorporate some humor. Your friends should be able to pick your essay from an anonymous pile, read it, and recognize it as yours. In that same vein, someone who doesn’t know you at all should feel like they understand your personality after reading your essay. 

4. Write in your own voice 

In order to bring authenticity to your essay, you’ll need to write in your own voice. Don’t be overly formal (but don’t be too casual, either). Remember: you want the reader to get to know the real you, not a version of you that comes across as overly stiff or stilted. You should feel free to use contractions, incorporate dialogue, and employ vocabulary that comes naturally to you. 

5. Use specific examples 

Real, concrete stories and examples will help your essay come to life. They’ll add color to your narrative and make it more compelling for the reader. The goal, after all, is to engage your audience—the admissions committee. 

For example, instead of stating that you care about animals, you should tell us a story about how you took care of an injured stray cat. 

Consider this side-by-side comparison:

Example 1: I care deeply about animals and even once rescued a stray cat. The cat had an injured leg, and I helped nurse it back to health.

Example 2: I lost many nights of sleep trying to nurse the stray cat back to health. Its leg infection was extremely painful, and it meowed in distress up until the wee hours of the morning. I didn’t mind it though; what mattered was that the cat regained its strength. So, I stayed awake to administer its medicine and soothe it with loving ear rubs.

The second example helps us visualize this situation and is more illustrative of the writer’s personality. Because she stayed awake to care for the cat, we can infer that she is a compassionate person who cares about animals. We don’t get the same depth with the first example. 

6. Don’t be afraid to show off… 

You should always put your best foot forward—the whole point of your essay is to market yourself to colleges. This isn’t the time to be shy about your accomplishments, skills, or qualities. 

7. …While also maintaining humility 

But don’t brag. Demonstrate humility when discussing your achievements. In the example above, for instance, the author discusses her accomplishments while noting that her parents thought of her as immature. This is a great way to show humility while still highlighting that she was able to prove her parents wrong.

8. Be vulnerable 

Vulnerability goes hand in hand with humility and authenticity. Don’t shy away from exploring how your experience affected you and the feelings you experienced. This, too, will help your story come to life. 

Here’s an excerpt from a Common App essay that demonstrates vulnerability and allows us to connect with the writer:  

“You ruined my life!” After months of quiet anger, my brother finally confronted me. To my shame, I had been appallingly ignorant of his pain. 

Despite being twins, Max and I are profoundly different. Having intellectual interests from a young age that, well, interested very few of my peers, I often felt out of step in comparison with my highly-social brother. Everything appeared to come effortlessly for Max and, while we share an extremely tight bond, his frequent time away with friends left me feeling more and more alone as we grew older.

In this essay, the writer isn’t afraid to share his insecurities and feelings with us. He states that he had been “ appallingly ignorant ” of his brother’s pain, that he “ often felt out of step ” compared to his brother, and that he had felt “ more and more alone ” over time. These are all emotions that you may not necessarily share with someone you just met, but it’s exactly this vulnerability that makes the essay more raw and relatable. 

9. Don’t lie or hyperbolize 

This essay is about the authentic you. Lying or hyperbolizing to make yourself sound better will not only make your essay—and entire application—less genuine, but it will also weaken it. More than likely, it will be obvious that you’re exaggerating. Plus, if colleges later find out that you haven’t been truthful in any part of your application, it’s grounds for revoking your acceptance or even expulsion if you’ve already matriculated. 

10. Avoid cliches 

How the COVID-19 pandemic changed your life. A sports victory as a metaphor for your journey. How a pet death altered your entire outlook. Admissions officers have seen more essays on these topics than they can possibly count. Unless you have a truly unique angle, then it’s in your best interest to avoid them. Learn which topics are cliche and how to fix them . 

11. Proofread 

This is a critical step. Even a small error can break your essay, however amazing it is otherwise. Make sure you read it over carefully, and get another set of eyes (or two or three other sets of eyes), just in case.

12. Abstain from using AI

There are a handful of good reasons to avoid using artificial intelligence (AI) to write your college essay. Most importantly, it’s dishonest and likely to be not very good; AI-generated essays are generally formulaic, generic, and boring—everything you’re trying to avoid being.   The purpose of the college essay is to share what makes you unique and highlight your personal experiences and perspectives, something that AI can’t capture.

13. Use parents as advisors, not editors

The voice of an adult is different from that of a high schooler and admissions committees are experts at spotting the writing of parents. Parents can play a valuable role in creating your college essay—advising, proofreading, and providing encouragement during those stressful moments. However, they should not write or edit your college essay with their words.

14. Have a hook

Admissions committees have a lot of essays to read and getting their attention is essential for standing out among a crowded field of applicants. A great hook captures your reader’s imagination and encourages them to keep reading your essay. Start strong, first impressions are everything!

15. Give them something to remember

The ending of your college essay is just as important as the beginning. Give your reader something to remember by composing an engaging and punchy paragraph or line—called a kicker in journalism—that ties everything you’ve written above together.

Where to Get Free Feedback on Your College Essay 

Before you send off your application, make sure you get feedback from a trusted source on your essay. CollegeVine’s free peer essay review will give you the support you need to ensure you’ve effectively presented your personality and accomplishments. Our expert essay review pairs you with an advisor to help you refine your writing, submit your best work, and boost your chances of getting into your dream school. Find the right advisor for you and get started on honing a winning essay.

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The importance of knowing yourself: your key to fulfillment

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What does it mean to know yourself?

The importance and benefits of knowing one's self, how to know yourself better, how to improve your self-knowledge, how coaching can help.

Think of the most eccentric person in your life. You know the one. 

The one who either shows up in a disheveled leather jacket or an all-black outfit and a beret. They’re somewhat aloof but always energetic. Unapologetically flamboyant, but always kind and understanding. This person chooses to be themselves, not who they’re expected to be. 

They don’t care about the world’s expectations. This sometimes gets them into trouble or attracts judging glares from nearby strangers. But, you have to admit, it would be nice to have that kind of self-confidence . And you can!

In a world rife with expectations, living authentically can feel impossible. It feels easier to have your path planned for you. But, in the long run, this will only hold you back from living a fulfilling life.

The great philosopher Socrates said it himself: “To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.” 

So if you’re wondering whether authenticity is worth pursuing, the short answer is “yes.” And, for the detail-oriented among you, here’s everything you need to know about the importance of knowing yourself — so you too can find your true self.

Knowing yourself is about discovering what makes you tick. Among other things, it means:

• Learning your likes and dislikes
• Unearthing your beliefs and values
• Knowing your personal boundaries
• Accepting your personality traits
• Being a better team player
• Having a clearer path in your professional life
• Understanding how you interact with others
• Recognizing your core personal values
• Increasing your capacity for self-compassion
• Having a clearer idea of your life’s purpose
• Knowing what it takes to be self-motivated
• Being more adaptable  

Ultimately, all of these things will increase your self-awareness . Being more self-aware lends to enhanced self-development, acceptance, and proactivity while benefiting our overall mental health .

We’ll be more confident, make better decisions, have stronger relationships, and be more honest .

Knowing yourself is about knowing what makes you tick. It means identifying what matters to you, your strengths and weaknesses, your behaviors, tendencies, and thought patterns. This list describes the importance and benefits of knowing one's self:

1. Despite your quirks, flaws, and insecurities, you learn self-love and acceptance. Once you do, you can walk through the world with more confidence and care less about what people think. 

2. You can change your personality flaws and improve on your weaknesses. You are empowered to become who you want to be. This will help you become a better, more well-rounded person.

3. You’ll have more emotional intelligence , which is key to knowing others. You’ll be more conscious of your own emotions and feelings, making it easier to understand another person's point of view.

4. You'll be more confident. Self-doubt disappears when you know and accept yourself, and others won't influence you as easily. It'll be easier to stand your ground .

5. You’ll forge better relationships. It’s easier to share yourself when you know yourself. You’ll also know what kind of people you get along with, so you can find your community .

6. You’ll be less stressed. Self-awareness will help you make decisions that are better for you. And when this happens, you become less stressed about what people think or whether you made the right choice. 

7. You’ll break patterns of disappointment. Y ou'll find repetitive behaviors that lead to poor outcomes when you look inward. Once you name them, you can break them.

8. You’ll be happier. Expressing who you are, loud and proud, will help you improve your well-being.

10. You'll have more self-worth. Why is self-worth important? Because it helps you avoid compromising your core values and beliefs. Valuing yourself also teaches others to respect you.

11. You'll understand your values. We can’t understate the importance of knowing your values. They will help you make decisions aligned with who you are and what you care about.

12. You'll find purpose in life. Knowing purpose in life will give you a clear idea of where you should go and what you should do. 

Getting to know yourself is hard. It involves deep self-reflection, honesty, and confronting parts of yourself you might be afraid of. But it’s a fundamental part of self-improvement .

If you need help, try working with a professional. BetterUp can help you navigate your inner world.

Now that we’re clear on the importance of knowing yourself, you might not know where to get started. Let’s get into it.

Check your VITALS

Author Meg Selig coined the term VITALS as a guide for developing self-knowledge. Its letters spell out the six core pillars of self-understanding:

These are your guides for decision-making and setting your goals. Understanding them will help you make decisions aligned with your authentic self. Here are some example values:

• Being helpful
• Trust 
• Wealth 

You can see how each of these might lead to different life choices. For example, if you value honesty, you might quit a job where you have to lie to others.

2. I nterests

Your interests are what you do without being asked, like your hobbies, passions, and causes you care about. You can then try to align your work with these interests. Here are some examples:

• Climate change. If you’re passionate about this issue, you might choose to work directly on the problem. Or you can make choices that allow for a more sustainable lifestyle, like owning an electric car.
• Audio editing. Perhaps you’re an amateur musician, and you spend your time recording and editing audio. You can start working as a freelance editor or find a job that uses these skills.
• Fitness. If you love working out and value helping others, you might consider becoming a trainer at your local gym or leading a running group.

Not all of your interests need to be a side-hustle . But being aware of them can help you make decisions that better suit your desired life. It is really about knowing your priorities.

3. T emperament

Your temperament describes where your energy comes from. You might be an introvert and value being alone. Or, as an extrovert, you find energy being around others.

Knowing your temperament will help you communicate your needs to others. 

If you’re a meticulous planner going on a trip, you should communicate this to your more spontaneous travel buddy. They might feel suffocated by your planning, leading to arguments down the road. Bringing it up before your trip will help talk it out to avoid conflict later.

4. A round-the-clock activities

This refers to when you like to do things. If you’re a writer and you’re more creative at night, carve out time in the evening to work. If you prefer working out in the morning, make it happen. Aligning your schedule with your internal clock will make you a happier human being.

5. L ife-mission and goals

Knowing your life mission is about knowing what gives your life meaning. It gives you purpose, a vocation , and something to strive for.

To find your life mission, think about what events were most meaningful to you so far. For example:

• Leading a successful project at the office
• Influencing positive change through your work
• Helping someone else succeed

There are many ways to fulfill a life mission. You can fulfill your goals with the skills and resources you have. For example, “helping someone succeed” could mean becoming a teacher or mentoring a young professional.

6. S trengths and weaknesses

These include both “hard skills” (like industry-specific knowledge and talents) and “soft skills” (like communication or emotional intelligence ).

When you do what you’re good at, you’re more likely to succeed, which will improve your morale and mental health.

Knowing your weaknesses and toxic traits will help you improve on them or minimize their influence on your life.

Are you ready to get started? There are many ways to understand your inner self:

• Write in a journal
• Step out of your comfort zone
• Track your progress
• Choose smart habits

A professional coach will encourage you to reflect on and reframe your inner thoughts and patterns. They understand that, in many cases, impulsivity holds you back from attaining your full potential.

The amygdala — an almond-sized region of the brain partially responsible for emotions — releases dopamine to reinforce impulsive behavior . This happens every time you open Facebook instead of working, eat chocolate while on a diet, or get angry at your colleagues instead of helping solve the problem.

Self-awareness can help you overcome your impulsivity. Armed with the right tools, you can break unhealthy or unwanted behaviors. 

A coach can help you meet these ends. They can teach you:

• Mindfulness: the acceptance that nothing is inherently good or bad 
• Metacognition: the awareness that your mind is the root of your actions
• Reframing: the power to react differently to an event or circumstance

These three elements can help you strengthen your self-control . You'll keep a cool head in stressful situations, communicate more effectively with others, and become a better leader overall.

In other words: by checking in with yourself, you avoid wrecking yourself.

At BetterUp , our coaches are trained in Inner Work® and understand the importance of knowing yourself. This is a lifetime journey. But together, we can make your life better.

Discover your authentic self

Kickstart your path to self-discovery and self-awareness. Our coaches can guide you to better understand yourself and your potential.

Allaya Cooks-Campbell

With over 15 years of content experience, Allaya Cooks Campbell has written for outlets such as ScaryMommy, HRzone, and HuffPost. She holds a B.A. in Psychology and is a certified yoga instructor as well as a certified Integrative Wellness & Life Coach. Allaya is passionate about whole-person wellness, yoga, and mental health.

The benefits of knowing yourself: Why you should become your own best friend

Self-knowledge examples that will help you upgrade to you 2.0, tune in to the self discovery channel with 10 tips for finding yourself, how to reset your life in 10 ways, reinventing yourself: 10 ways to realize your full potential, 10 self-discovery techniques to help you find yourself, life purpose: the inspiration you need to find your drive, 20 personal values examples to help you find your own, how to know yourself: tips for beginning your self-discovery journey, similar articles, the subtle, but important, difference between confidence and arrogance, how self-compassion and motivation will help achieve your goals, how to walk the freeing path of believing in yourself, what is self-awareness and how to develop it, self-awareness in leadership: how it will make you a better boss, 17 self-awareness activities for exploring yourself, what are metacognitive skills examples in everyday life, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

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Essay on Be Yourself

Students are often asked to write an essay on Be Yourself in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Be Yourself

Understanding ‘be yourself’.

‘Be Yourself’ is a popular phrase. It means to act in ways that reflect who you truly are, not who others want you to be.

The Importance of Being Yourself

Being yourself is important. It allows you to live authentically, making decisions that align with your beliefs and values.

How to Be Yourself

To be yourself, you must understand your own values, passions, and strengths. Don’t be afraid to express your unique thoughts and feelings.

In conclusion, being yourself is about authenticity and personal growth. It’s a journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance.

250 Words Essay on Be Yourself

Introduction.

“Be yourself” is a phrase often tossed around in our society. It is a call to authenticity, a plea for individuality, and a mantra for self-expression. But what does it truly mean to be oneself in a world that is constantly changing and evolving?

Authenticity

Authenticity is the cornerstone of being yourself. It involves the courage to express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs, even when they diverge from societal norms. Authenticity is about embracing your uniqueness and not being afraid to stand out.

Individuality

Individuality, another key aspect of being yourself, is about recognizing your unique qualities, interests, and passions. It’s about forging your own path and not blindly following the crowd. Individuality fosters creativity, innovation, and personal growth.

Self-Expression

Self-expression is the outward manifestation of being yourself. It is the way you communicate your authenticity and individuality to the world. This can be through your words, actions, style, or art. Self-expression is a celebration of who you are.

Being yourself is not without its challenges. It requires courage to resist societal pressures and the fear of judgment. It demands self-awareness to understand your true self and the strength to stay true to it.

In essence, being yourself is about authenticity, individuality, and self-expression. It is a journey of self-discovery and acceptance. It is a commitment to personal growth and the courage to stand out. It is not always easy, but it is always worth it. For in being yourself, you find your unique place in the world.

500 Words Essay on Be Yourself

The essence of authenticity.

In an era of social media and digital personas, the concept of being yourself has become increasingly complex yet crucial. The pressure to conform to societal norms, expectations, and ideals can be overwhelming, often leading individuals to lose sight of their authentic selves.

The Importance of Self-Identity

Self-identity is a fundamental aspect of human existence. It is the unique combination of qualities, beliefs, and experiences that define an individual. It is the compass that guides our decisions, shapes our perceptions, and influences our interactions. Embracing our self-identity, therefore, is not only a path to personal fulfillment but also a testament to our respect for the diversity that enriches our collective human experience.

Consequences of Inauthenticity

The decision to conform, to wear a mask, or to live according to someone else’s expectations can have serious repercussions. It can lead to a feeling of emptiness, a lack of fulfillment, and even mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. Inauthenticity can also impact our relationships, as genuine connections are built on honesty and authenticity.

The Power of Authenticity

Being authentic means being true to ourselves, acknowledging our strengths and weaknesses, and not being afraid to express our thoughts, feelings, and desires. This authenticity breeds confidence, as we no longer feel the need to hide behind a façade or pretend to be someone we’re not. It also fosters resilience, as we learn to navigate the world as we are, rather than as we think we should be.

Embracing Authenticity in a Conforming World

Embracing authenticity in a conforming world is no easy task. It requires courage, self-awareness, and a commitment to personal growth. It involves challenging societal norms, questioning the status quo, and standing up for our beliefs, even when they are unpopular.

However, it is important to remember that being authentic does not mean being selfish or disregarding the feelings of others. It means being honest and respectful, both with ourselves and with those around us. It means listening to our inner voice, but also being open to the perspectives and experiences of others.

In conclusion, being yourself is a journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance. It is a commitment to live authentically, despite societal pressures to conform. It is a celebration of our uniqueness and an acceptance of our humanity, with all its imperfections. By embracing our authentic selves, we not only enrich our own lives, but also contribute to a more diverse, inclusive, and empathetic world.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

• Essay on Blood Donation
• Essay on Be Kind to Animals
• Essay on Be Grateful

Apart from these, you can look at all the essays by clicking here .

Happy studying!

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Articles About Being Yourself: Top 5 Examples and 6 Prompts

To be yourself is the most important principle you should follow in life; to write articles about being yourself, see our guide for inspiration.

Being yourself means to be authentically you in all aspects of life. This is essential to success because self-improvement starts with self-love. It may be difficult to stay true to yourself, and what you want, so you must continue to value the person you are, complete with all your flaws and insecurities. 

Being your authentic self is the best thing you can do for your well-being, which can, in turn, make you into a more positive presence in the lives of others. Reading some of the best self-help books can be a great place to start before writing articles about being yourself.

5 Example Articles

1. what you need to know about toxic positivity by mckenna princing, 2. authentic self-expression on social media is associated with greater subjective well-being by erica r. bailey, sandra c. matz, wu youyou, and sheena s. iyengar, 3. being your authentic self is easier said than done but worth it by meg lyons, 4. importance of being yourself (author unknown), 5. finding your true self during the coronavirus lockdown by hayley broughton-mckinna, 1. embracing your imperfection, 2. how to practice a positive mindset, 3. the importance of self-love, 4. the challenges of being yourself, 5. reflecting on being yourself.

“We often have excuses for not engaging with our complicated emotions: We’re too busy to deal with them, we don’t want to be distressed, we don’t want to upset others. Remember, though, your negative feelings won’t go away unless you eventually deal with them. So acknowledge them, try to understand where they might be coming from, and think about what you can do to address them.”

In this article, Pricing describes that an important part of being yourself is allowing yourself sometimes to feel negative emotions. Even if we may not want to address our more difficult emotions, it is an essential part of being ourselves to let ourselves go through everything we are feeling. That way, we do not bottle the feelings until it becomes too severe. We should still focus on the positive, but not at the cost of repressing our more negative inclinations. 

“Our results suggest that whether or not engaging with social media helps or hurts an individual’s well-being might be partly driven by how they use those platforms to express themselves. While it may be tempting to craft a self-enhanced Facebook presence, authentic self-expression on social media can be psychologically beneficial.”

In this article, the authors discuss their research results which showed that people more concerned with creating an (often fake) impression on social media were less satisfied with life than those who did not. Their research shows the importance of being yourself and that it can lead to much greater levels of self-satisfaction, more than any fame gained from a false online persona.

“In the workplace, this inauthenticity can show up as a role mismatch. You may not feel that you’re fully able to express your values or strengths in order to get the work done. If you love designing new concepts or thrive in the creative phase of idea generation, you might struggle to enjoy the day-to-day details.”

Lyons discusses how being authentic can make you more grounded and gives tips on how to maintain your authentic self. She also gives readers eight strategies they can use to be authentic, such as embracing feelings, determining strengths and weaknesses, and facing one’s fears. An important example she gives involves exploring the values you may hold dear. For example, you should choose what you believe rather than what’s popular or what will get you somewhere. You might also find these essays about myself helpful.

“Being yourself means you like who you are. Being yourself means living life how you wanted to live it, regardless of other peoples’ opinions. And it just means you respect yourself. Worrying about what others will think is just a waste of time, you can’t control them or control their thoughts. Everyone has their own life and they are free to live their life on their own terms and conditions.”

In this article, the author stresses the importance of being yourself and not worrying about what others have to say. She gives examples of her past when she constantly tried to satisfy others with little regard for her well-being. However, she realized how much healthier it is to stop being so concerned about what others think and be authentic. 

“Social distancing has presented us with an invaluable opportunity to get to know our true selves. We have nothing but time to listen to ourselves and to tune in to our thoughts and feelings. We have an unprecedented opportunity to get to know what motivates us, what scares us, what drives and excites us. We can ask ourselves who we want to be, and who we don’t!”

This article explores the challenge of staying true to oneself during an extreme situation such as the COVID-19 pandemic. Broughton-McKinna discusses several habits readers can adopt, even in a time of lockdown, to get to know themselves. These include journaling, spending time in nature, and video blogging. She encourages readers to use their time in self-isolation to discover themselves and what makes them happy. 

Grammarly is one of our top grammar checkers. Find out why in this Grammarly review .

5 Writing Prompts On Articles About Being Yourself

In this article, address your words to readers and remind them that it’s okay not to be okay sometimes. You can give examples of people you know who have embraced their flaws, or you can give an example from your own life. Then, advise the reader on how to live out their authentic selves more and embrace their imperfections. 

If you want to be yourself, you must see yourself positively. Discuss different ways to practice positive thinking, including exercise, meditation, self-care breaks, or even drinking tea in the morning. It can also involve going to therapy or cutting out toxic people from your life. Take a look at how positive practices can create space for happiness in everyday life, and share your top tips with your readers.

You cannot be yourself if you do not love yourself first. In your article, discuss why self-love is so important and explain the concept from a more reflective and scientific standpoint. In addition, you can explore the connection between self-love and being your authentic self, explaining the impact of being yourself along the way. 

As Lyons’ article states, being yourself is easier said than done. Many people find it hard to be authentic, especially when it is easier to fake aspects of yourself online. Research why people can be prone to being inauthentic portrayals of themselves on social media and explain the different reasons. Cite credible sources for an accurate and reliable piece.

For this topic, reflect on what it means to be yourself. What does “being yourself” look like to you, and how do you practice being your authentic self in life? Use specific events in your life to explain your points. Then, use your reflection as a basis to guide and encourage others to be themselves online and in a social setting.

For help editing your articles, we recommend using the best grammar checker . Our round-up profiles these tools and offers discounts.If you want to use the latest grammar software, read our guide to using an AI grammar checker .

Martin is an avid writer specializing in editing and proofreading. He also enjoys literary analysis and writing about food and travel.

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The importance of being true to yourself.

Being true to yourself is a life-long practice that requires commitment and re-commitment, moment to moment, as you grow and evolve. The answer to what is true for you always exists at the core of who you are, if you give yourself the space and time to listen.

When you are being true to yourself, you are completely honest with what you feel, deeply value, and desire. It also means communicating your feelings wholeheartedly both with yourself and others, allowing your truth to flow through you and into the world.

To know your truth fully and express it authentically, you first need to cultivate a deep and trusting relationship with yourself. Ultimately, this begins with awareness of your thoughts, as well as awareness of your whole-body experience and how you interact with the world each day.

You can expand your awareness and strengthen the connection with yourself through introspective practices such as meditation, yoga, and journal writing. These practices help you become more present and establish reference points to identify when you are (or are not) living in alignment with the deeper aspect of yourself. The more you practice, the easier it becomes to self-correct when you are out of alignment.

Understanding when you are in alignment or out of alignment may often be based on an intuitive feeling rather than a thought. Feelings of openness, expansion, inner joy and freedom are good signs that you are on the right path. Conversely, if you are not being true to yourself, it may show up through feelings of contraction and tension, unease, disconnection, resignation, emptiness, discontentment, or a lack of fulfillment.

By learning to pay attention to your deeper senses and feelings, and by cultivating greater awareness in your life, you can establish a strong connection to yourself and feel confident in knowing what is deeply true for you.

But what is true, also yearns to be expressed. So it is up to each of us to be courageous in bringing forth our own truth, expressing it fully and authentically in the world.

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What does Emerson say about self-reliance?

In Emerson's essay “ Self-Reliance ,” he boldly states society (especially today’s politically correct environment) hurts a person’s growth.

Emerson wrote that self-sufficiency gives a person in society the freedom they need to discover their true self and attain their true independence.

Believing that individualism, personal responsibility , and nonconformity were essential to a thriving society. But to get there, Emerson knew that each individual had to work on themselves to achieve this level of individualism. 

Today, we see society's breakdowns daily and wonder how we arrived at this state of society. One can see how the basic concepts of self-trust, self-awareness, and self-acceptance have significantly been ignored.

Who published self-reliance?

Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote the essay, published in 1841 as part of his first volume of collected essays titled "Essays: First Series."

It would go on to be known as Ralph Waldo Emerson's Self Reliance and one of the most well-known pieces of American literature.

The collection was published by James Munroe and Company.

What are the examples of self-reliance?

Examples of self-reliance can be as simple as tying your shoes and as complicated as following your inner voice and not conforming to paths set by society or religion.

Self-reliance can also be seen as getting things done without relying on others, being able to “pull your weight” by paying your bills, and caring for yourself and your family correctly.

Self-reliance involves relying on one's abilities, judgment, and resources to navigate life. Here are more examples of self-reliance seen today:

Entrepreneurship: Starting and running your own business, relying on your skills and determination to succeed.

Financial Independence: Managing your finances responsibly, saving money, and making sound investment decisions to secure your financial future.

Learning and Education: Taking the initiative to educate oneself, whether through formal education, self-directed learning, or acquiring new skills.

Problem-Solving: Tackling challenges independently, finding solutions to problems, and adapting to changing circumstances.

Personal Development: Taking responsibility for personal growth, setting goals, and working towards self-improvement.

Homesteading: Growing your food, raising livestock, or becoming self-sufficient in various aspects of daily life.

DIY Projects: Undertaking do-it-yourself projects, from home repairs to crafting, without relying on external help.

Living Off the Grid: Living independently from public utilities, generating your energy, and sourcing your water.

Decision-Making: Trusting your instincts and making decisions based on your values and beliefs rather than relying solely on external advice.

Crisis Management: Handling emergencies and crises with resilience and resourcefulness without depending on external assistance.

These examples illustrate different facets of self-reliance, emphasizing independence, resourcefulness, and the ability to navigate life autonomously.

What is the purpose of self reliance by Emerson?

In his essay, " Self Reliance, " Emerson's sole purpose is the want for people to avoid conformity. Emerson believed that in order for a man to truly be a man, he was to follow his own conscience and "do his own thing."

Essentially, do what you believe is right instead of blindly following society.

Why is it important to be self reliant?

While getting help from others, including friends and family, can be an essential part of your life and fulfilling. However, help may not always be available, or the assistance you receive may not be what you had hoped for.

It is for this reason that Emerson pushed for self-reliance. If a person were independent, could solve their problems, and fulfill their needs and desires, they would be a more vital member of society.

This can lead to growth in the following areas:

Empowerment: Self-reliance empowers individuals to take control of their lives. It fosters a sense of autonomy and the ability to make decisions independently.

Resilience: Developing self-reliance builds resilience, enabling individuals to bounce back from setbacks and face challenges with greater adaptability.

Personal Growth: Relying on oneself encourages continuous learning and personal growth. It motivates individuals to acquire new skills and knowledge.

Freedom: Self-reliance provides a sense of freedom from external dependencies. It reduces reliance on others for basic needs, decisions, or validation.

Confidence: Achieving goals through one's own efforts boosts confidence and self-esteem. It instills a belief in one's capabilities and strengthens a positive self-image.

Resourcefulness: Being self-reliant encourages resourcefulness. Individuals learn to solve problems creatively, adapt to changing circumstances, and make the most of available resources.

Adaptability: Self-reliant individuals are often more adaptable to change. They can navigate uncertainties with a proactive and positive mindset.

Reduced Stress: Dependence on others can lead to stress and anxiety, especially when waiting for external support. Self-reliance reduces reliance on external factors for emotional well-being.

Personal Responsibility: It promotes a sense of responsibility for one's own life and decisions. Self-reliant individuals are more likely to take ownership of their actions and outcomes.

Goal Achievement: Being self-reliant facilitates the pursuit and achievement of personal and professional goals. It allows individuals to overcome obstacles and stay focused on their objectives.

Overall, self-reliance contributes to personal empowerment, mental resilience, and the ability to lead a fulfilling and purposeful life. While collaboration and support from others are valuable, cultivating a strong sense of self-reliance enhances one's capacity to navigate life's challenges independently.

What did Emerson mean, "Envy is ignorance, imitation is suicide"?

According to Emerson, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to you independently, but every person is given a plot of ground to till. 

In other words, Emerson believed that a person's main focus in life is to work on oneself, increasing their maturity and intellect, and overcoming insecurities, which will allow a person to be self-reliant to the point where they no longer envy others but measure themselves against how they were the day before.

When we do become self-reliant, we focus on creating rather than imitating. Being someone we are not is just as damaging to the soul as suicide.

Envy is ignorance: Emerson suggests that feeling envious of others is a form of ignorance. Envy often arises from a lack of understanding or appreciation of one's unique qualities and potential. Instead of being envious, individuals should focus on discovering and developing their talents and strengths.

Imitation is suicide: Emerson extends the idea by stating that imitation, or blindly copying others, is a form of self-destruction. He argues that true individuality and personal growth come from expressing one's unique voice and ideas. In this context, imitation is seen as surrendering one's identity and creativity, leading to a kind of "spiritual death."

What are the transcendental elements in Emerson’s self-reliance?

The five predominant elements of Transcendentalism are nonconformity, self-reliance, free thought, confidence, and the importance of nature.

The Transcendentalism movement emerged in New England between 1820 and 1836. It is essential to differentiate this movement from Transcendental Meditation, a distinct practice.

According to the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, Transcendentalism is characterized as "an American literary, political, and philosophical movement of the early nineteenth century, centered around Ralph Waldo Emerson." A central tenet of this movement is the belief that individual purity can be 'corrupted' by society.

Are Emerson's writings referenced in pop culture?

Emerson has made it into popular culture. One such example is in the film Next Stop Wonderland released in 1998. The reference is a quote from Emerson's essay on Self Reliance, "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds."

This becomes a running theme in the film as a single woman (Hope Davis ), who is quite familiar with Emerson's writings and showcases several men taking her on dates, attempting to impress her by quoting the famous line, only to botch the line and also giving attribution to the wrong person. One gentleman says confidently it was W.C. Fields, while another matches the quote with Cicero. One goes as far as stating it was Karl Marx!

Why does Emerson say about self confidence?

Content is coming very soon.

Self-Reliance: The Complete Essay

Ne te quaesiveris extra."

Man is his own star; and the soul that can Render an honest and a perfect man, Commands all light, all influence, all fate ; Nothing to him falls early or too late. Our acts our angels are, or good or ill, Our fatal shadows that walk by us still." Epilogue to Beaumont and Fletcher's Honest Man's Fortune Cast the bantling on the rocks, Suckle him with the she-wolf's teat; Wintered with the hawk and fox, Power and speed be hands and feet.

Ralph Waldo Emerson left the ministry to pursue a career in writing and public speaking. Emerson became one of America's best known and best-loved 19th-century figures. More About Emerson

Ralph Waldo Emerson Self Reliance Summary

The essay “Self-Reliance,” written by Ralph Waldo Emerson, is, by far, his most famous piece of work. Emerson, a Transcendentalist, believed focusing on the purity and goodness of individualism and community with nature was vital for a strong society. Transcendentalists despise the corruption and conformity of human society and institutions. Published in 1841, the Self Reliance essay is a deep-dive into self-sufficiency as a virtue.

In the essay "Self-Reliance," Ralph Waldo Emerson advocates for individuals to trust in their own instincts and ideas rather than blindly following the opinions of society and its institutions. He argues that society encourages conformity, stifles individuality, and encourages readers to live authentically and self-sufficient lives.

Emerson also stresses the importance of being self-reliant, relying on one's own abilities and judgment rather than external validation or approval from others. He argues that people must be honest with themselves and seek to understand their own thoughts and feelings rather than blindly following the expectations of others. Through this essay, Emerson emphasizes the value of independence, self-discovery, and personal growth.

What is the Meaning of Self-Reliance?

I read the other day some verses written by an eminent painter which were original and not conventional. The soul always hears an admonition in such lines, let the subject be what it may. The sentiment they instill is of more value than any thought they may contain. To believe your own thought, to think that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men, — that is genius.

Speak your latent conviction, and it shall be the universal sense; for the inmost in due time becomes the outmost,—— and our first thought is rendered back to us by the trumpets of the Last Judgment. Familiar as the voice of the mind is to each, the highest merit we ascribe to Moses, Plato, and Milton is, that they set at naught books and traditions, and spoke not what men but what they thought. A man should learn to detect and watch that gleam of light that flashes across his mind from within, more than the luster of the firmament of bards and sages. Yet he dismisses without notice his thought because it is his. In every work of genius, we recognize our own rejected thoughts: they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty.

Great works of art have no more affecting lessons for us than this. They teach us to abide by our spontaneous impression with good-humored inflexibility than most when the whole cry of voices is on the other side. Else, tomorrow a stranger will say with masterly good sense precisely what we have thought and felt all the time, and we shall be forced to take with shame our own opinion from another.

There is a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion; that though the wide universe is full of good, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to him but through his toil bestowed on that plot of ground which is given to him to till. The power which resides in him is new in nature, and none but he knows what that is which he can do, nor does he know until he has tried. Not for nothing one face, one character, one fact, makes much impression on him, and another none. This sculpture in the memory is not without preestablished harmony. The eye was placed where one ray should fall, that it might testify of that particular ray. We but half express ourselves and are ashamed of that divine idea which each of us represents. It may be safely trusted as proportionate and of good issues, so it be faithfully imparted, but God will not have his work made manifest by cowards. A man is relieved and gay when he has put his heart into his work and done his best; but what he has said or done otherwise, shall give him no peace. It is a deliverance that does not deliver. In the attempt his genius deserts him; no muse befriends; no invention, no hope.

Trust Thyself: Every Heart Vibrates To That Iron String.

Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, and the connection of events. Great men have always done so, and confided themselves childlike to the genius of their age, betraying their perception that the absolutely trustworthy was seated at their heart, working through their hands, predominating in all their being. And we are now men, and must accept in the highest mind the same transcendent destiny; and not minors and invalids in a protected corner, not cowards fleeing before a revolution, but guides, redeemers, and benefactors, obeying the Almighty effort, and advancing on Chaos and the Dark.

What pretty oracles nature yields to us in this text, in the face and behaviour of children, babes, and even brutes! That divided and rebel mind, that distrust of a sentiment because our arithmetic has computed the strength and means opposed to our purpose, these have not. Their mind being whole, their eye is as yet unconquered, and when we look in their faces, we are disconcerted. Infancy conforms to nobody: all conform to it, so that one babe commonly makes four or five out of the adults who prattle and play to it. So God has armed youth and puberty and manhood no less with its own piquancy and charm, and made it enviable and gracious and its claims not to be put by, if it will stand by itself. Do not think the youth has no force, because he cannot speak to you and me. Hark! in the next room his voice is sufficiently clear and emphatic. It seems he knows how to speak to his contemporaries. Bashful or bold, then, he will know how to make us seniors very unnecessary.

The nonchalance of boys who are sure of a dinner, and would disdain as much as a lord to do or say aught to conciliate one, is the healthy attitude of human nature. A boy is in the parlour what the pit is in the playhouse; independent, irresponsible, looking out from his corner on such people and facts as pass by, he tries and sentences them on their merits, in the swift, summary way of boys, as good, bad, interesting, silly, eloquent, troublesome. He cumbers himself never about consequences, about interests: he gives an independent, genuine verdict. You must court him: he does not court you. But the man is, as it were, clapped into jail by his consciousness. As soon as he has once acted or spoken with eclat, he is a committed person, watched by the sympathy or the hatred of hundreds, whose affections must now enter into his account. There is no Lethe for this. Ah, that he could pass again into his neutrality! Who can thus avoid all pledges, and having observed, observe again from the same unaffected, unbiased, unbribable, unaffrighted innocence, must always be formidable. He would utter opinions on all passing affairs, which being seen to be not private, but necessary, would sink like darts into the ear of men, and put them in fear.

These are the voices which we hear in solitude, but they grow faint and inaudible as we enter into the world. Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members. Society is a joint-stock company, in which the members agree, for the better securing of his bread to each shareholder, to surrender the liberty and culture of the eater. The virtue in most request is conformity. Self-reliance is its aversion. It loves not realities and creators, but names and customs.

Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist. He who would gather immortal palms must not be hindered by the name of goodness, but must explore if it be goodness. Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind. Absolve you to yourself, and you shall have the suffrage of the world. I remember an answer which when quite young I was prompted to make to a valued adviser, who was wont to importune me with the dear old doctrines of the church. On my saying, What have I to do with the sacredness of traditions, if I live wholly from within? my friend suggested, — "But these impulses may be from below, not from above." I replied, "They do not seem to me to be such; but if I am the Devil's child, I will live then from the Devil." No law can be sacred to me but that of my nature. Good and bad are but names very readily transferable to that or this; the only right is what is after my constitution, the only wrong what is against it. A man is to carry himself in the presence of all opposition, as if every thing were titular and ephemeral but he. I am ashamed to think how easily we capitulate to badges and names, to large societies and dead institutions. Every decent and well-spoken individual affects and sways me more than is right. I ought to go upright and vital, and speak the rude truth in all ways. If malice and vanity wear the coat of philanthropy, shall that pass? If an angry bigot assumes this bountiful cause of Abolition, and comes to me with his last news from Barbadoes, why should I not say to him, 'Go love thy infant; love thy wood-chopper: be good-natured and modest: have that grace; and never varnish your hard, uncharitable ambition with this incredible tenderness for black folk a thousand miles off. Thy love afar is spite at home.' Rough and graceless would be such greeting, but truth is handsomer than the affectation of love. Your goodness must have some edge to it, — else it is none. The doctrine of hatred must be preached as the counteraction of the doctrine of love when that pules and whines. I shun father and mother and wife and brother, when my genius calls me. The lintels of the door-post I would write on, Whim . It is somewhat better than whim at last I hope, but we cannot spend the day in explanation. Expect me not to show cause why I seek or why I exclude company. Then, again, do not tell me, as a good man did to-day, of my obligation to put all poor men in good situations. Are they my poor? I tell thee, thou foolish philanthropist, that I grudge the dollar, the dime, the cent, I give to such men as do not belong to me and to whom I do not belong. There is a class of persons to whom by all spiritual affinity I am bought and sold; for them I will go to prison, if need be; but your miscellaneous popular charities; the education at college of fools; the building of meeting-houses to the vain end to which many now stand; alms to sots; and the thousandfold Relief Societies; — though I confess with shame I sometimes succumb and give the dollar, it is a wicked dollar which by and by I shall have the manhood to withhold.

Virtues are, in the popular estimate, rather the exception than the rule. There is the man and his virtues. Men do what is called a good action, as some piece of courage or charity, much as they would pay a fine in expiation of daily non-appearance on parade. Their works are done as an apology or extenuation of their living in the world, — as invalids and the insane pay a high board. Their virtues are penances. I do not wish to expiate, but to live. My life is for itself and not for a spectacle. I much prefer that it should be of a lower strain, so it be genuine and equal, than that it should be glittering and unsteady. Wish it to be sound and sweet, and not to need diet and bleeding. The primary evidence I ask that you are a man, and refuse this appeal from the man to his actions. For myself it makes no difference that I know, whether I do or forbear those actions which are reckoned excellent. I cannot consent to pay for a privilege where I have intrinsic right. Few and mean as my gifts may be, I actually am, and do not need for my own assurance or the assurance of my fellows any secondary testimony.

What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think.

This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. The easy thing in the world is to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.

The objection to conforming to usages that have become dead to you is, that it scatters your force. It loses your time and blurs the impression of your character. If you maintain a dead church, contribute to a dead Bible-society, vote with a great party either for the government or against it, spread your table like base housekeepers, — under all these screens I have difficulty to detect the precise man you are. And, of course, so much force is withdrawn from your proper life. But do your work, and I shall know you. Do your work, and you shall reinforce yourself. A man must consider what a blindman's-buff is this game of conformity. If I know your sect, I anticipate your argument. I hear a preacher announce for his text and topic the expediency of one of the institutions of his church. Do I not know beforehand that not possibly can he say a new and spontaneous word? With all this ostentation of examining the grounds of the institution, do I not know that he will do no such thing? Do not I know that he is pledged to himself not to look but at one side, — the permitted side, not as a man, but as a parish minister? He is a retained attorney, and these airs of the bench are the emptiest affectation. Well, most men have bound their eyes with one or another handkerchief, and attached themselves to some one of these communities of opinion. This conformity makes them not false in a few particulars, authors of a few lies, but false in all particulars. Their every truth is not quite true. Their two is not the real two, their four not the real four; so that every word they say chagrins us, and we know not where to begin to set them right. Meantime nature is not slow to equip us in the prison-uniform of the party to which we adhere. We come to wear one cut of face and figure, and acquire by degrees the gentlest asinine expression. There is a mortifying experience in particular, which does not fail to wreak itself also in the general history; I mean "the foolish face of praise," the forced smile which we put on in company where we do not feel at ease in answer to conversation which does not interest us. The muscles, not spontaneously moved, but moved by a low usurping wilfulness, grow tight about the outline of the face with the most disagreeable sensation.

For nonconformity the world whips you with its displeasure. And therefore a man must know how to estimate a sour face. The by-standers look askance on him in the public street or in the friend's parlour. If this aversation had its origin in contempt and resistance like his own, he might well go home with a sad countenance; but the sour faces of the multitude, like their sweet faces, have no deep cause, but are put on and off as the wind blows and a newspaper directs. Yet is the discontent of the multitude more formidable than that of the senate and the college. It is easy enough for a firm man who knows the world to brook the rage of the cultivated classes. Their rage is decorous and prudent, for they are timid as being very vulnerable themselves. But when to their feminine rage the indignation of the people is added, when the ignorant and the poor are aroused, when the unintelligent brute force that lies at the bottom of society is made to growl and mow, it needs the habit of magnanimity and religion to treat it godlike as a trifle of no concernment.

The other terror that scares us from self-trust is our consistency; a reverence for our past act or word, because the eyes of others have no other data for computing our orbit than our past acts, and we are loath to disappoint them.

But why should you keep your head over your shoulder? Why drag about this corpse of your memory, lest you contradict somewhat you have stated in this or that public place? Suppose you should contradict yourself; what then? It seems to be a rule of wisdom never to rely on your memory alone, scarcely even in acts of pure memory, but to bring the past for judgment into the thousand-eyed present, and live ever in a new day. In your metaphysics you have denied personality to the Deity: yet when the devout motions of the soul come, yield to them heart and life, though they should clothe God with shape and color. Leave your theory, as Joseph his coat in the hand of the harlot, and flee.

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do. He may as well concern himself with his shadow on the wall. Speak what you think now in hard words, and to-morrow speak what to-morrow thinks in hard words again, though it contradict every thing you said to-day. — 'Ah, so you shall be sure to be misunderstood.' — Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood.

I suppose no man can violate his nature.

All the sallies of his will are rounded in by the law of his being, as the inequalities of Andes and Himmaleh are insignificant in the curve of the sphere. Nor does it matter how you gauge and try him. A character is like an acrostic or Alexandrian stanza; — read it forward, backward, or across, it still spells the same thing. In this pleasing, contrite wood-life which God allows me, let me record day by day my honest thought without prospect or retrospect, and, I cannot doubt, it will be found symmetrical, though I mean it not, and see it not. My book should smell of pines and resound with the hum of insects. The swallow over my window should interweave that thread or straw he carries in his bill into my web also. We pass for what we are. Character teaches above our wills. Men imagine that they communicate their virtue or vice only by overt actions, and do not see that virtue or vice emit a breath every moment.

There will be an agreement in whatever variety of actions, so they be each honest and natural in their hour. For of one will, the actions will be harmonious, however unlike they seem. These varieties are lost sight of at a little distance, at a little height of thought. One tendency unites them all. The voyage of the best ship is a zigzag line of a hundred tacks. See the line from a sufficient distance, and it straightens itself to the average tendency. Your genuine action will explain itself, and will explain your other genuine actions. Your conformity explains nothing. Act singly, and what you have already done singly will justify you now. Greatness appeals to the future. If I can be firm enough to-day to do right, and scorn eyes, I must have done so much right before as to defend me now. Be it how it will, do right now. Always scorn appearances, and you always may. The force of character is cumulative. All the foregone days of virtue work their health into this. What makes the majesty of the heroes of the senate and the field, which so fills the imagination? The consciousness of a train of great days and victories behind. They shed an united light on the advancing actor. He is attended as by a visible escort of angels. That is it which throws thunder into Chatham's voice, and dignity into Washington's port, and America into Adams's eye. Honor is venerable to us because it is no ephemeris. It is always ancient virtue. We worship it today because it is not of today. We love it and pay it homage, because it is not a trap for our love and homage, but is self-dependent, self-derived, and therefore of an old immaculate pedigree, even if shown in a young person.

I hope in these days we have heard the last of conformity and consistency. Let the words be gazetted and ridiculous henceforward. Instead of the gong for dinner, let us hear a whistle from the Spartan fife. Let us never bow and apologize more. A great man is coming to eat at my house. I do not wish to please him; He should wish to please me, that I wish. I will stand here for humanity, and though I would make it kind, I would make it true. Let us affront and reprimand the smooth mediocrity and squalid contentment of the times, and hurl in the face of custom, and trade, and office, the fact which is the upshot of all history, that there is a great responsible Thinker and Actor working wherever a man works; that a true man belongs to no other time or place, but is the centre of things. Where he is, there is nature. He measures you, and all men, and all events. Ordinarily, every body in society reminds us of somewhat else, or of some other person. Character, reality, reminds you of nothing else; it takes place of the whole creation. The man must be so much, that he must make all circumstances indifferent. Every true man is a cause, a country, and an age; requires infinite spaces and numbers and time fully to accomplish his design; — and posterity seem to follow his steps as a train of clients. A man Caesar is born, and for ages after we have a Roman Empire. Christ is born, and millions of minds so grow and cleave to his genius, that he is confounded with virtue and the possible of man. An institution is the lengthened shadow of one man; as, Monachism, of the Hermit Antony; the Reformation, of Luther; Quakerism, of Fox; Methodism, of Wesley; Abolition, of Clarkson. Scipio, Milton called "the height of Rome"; and all history resolves itself very easily into the biography of a few stout and earnest persons.

Let a man then know his worth, and keep things under his feet. Let him not peep or steal, or skulk up and down with the air of a charity-boy, a bastard, or an interloper, in the world which exists for him. But the man in the street, finding no worth in himself which corresponds to the force which built a tower or sculptured a marble god, feels poor when he looks on these. To him a palace, a statue, or a costly book have an alien and forbidding air, much like a gay equipage, and seem to say like that, 'Who are you, Sir?' Yet they all are his, suitors for his notice, petitioners to his faculties that they will come out and take possession. The picture waits for my verdict: it is not to command me, but I am to settle its claims to praise. That popular fable of the sot who was picked up dead drunk in the street, carried to the duke's house, washed and dressed and laid in the duke's bed, and, on his waking, treated with all obsequious ceremony like the duke, and assured that he had been insane, owes its popularity to the fact, that it symbolizes so well the state of man, who is in the world a sort of sot, but now and then wakes up, exercises his reason, and finds himself a true prince.

Our reading is mendicant and sycophantic. In history, our imagination plays us false. Kingdom and lordship, power and estate, are a gaudier vocabulary than private John and Edward in a small house and common day's work; but the things of life are the same to both; the sum total of both is the same. Why all this deference to Alfred, and Scanderbeg, and Gustavus? Suppose they were virtuous; did they wear out virtue? As great a stake depends on your private act to-day, as followed their public and renowned steps. When private men shall act with original views, the lustre will be transferred from the actions of kings to those of gentlemen.

The world has been instructed by its kings, who have so magnetized the eyes of nations. It has been taught by this colossal symbol the mutual reverence that is due from man to man. The joyful loyalty with which men have everywhere suffered the king, the noble, or the great proprietor to walk among them by a law of his own, make his own scale of men and things, and reverse theirs, pay for benefits not with money but with honor, and represent the law in his person, was the hieroglyphic by which they obscurely signified their consciousness of their own right and comeliness, the right of every man.

The magnetism which all original action exerts is explained when we inquire the reason of self-trust.

Who is the Trustee? What is the aboriginal Self, on which a universal reliance may be grounded? What is the nature and power of that science-baffling star, without parallax, without calculable elements, which shoots a ray of beauty even into trivial and impure actions, if the least mark of independence appear? The inquiry leads us to that source, at once the essence of genius, of virtue, and of life, which we call Spontaneity or Instinct. We denote this primary wisdom as Intuition, whilst all later teachings are tuitions. In that deep force, the last fact behind which analysis cannot go, all things find their common origin. For, the sense of being which in calm hours rises, we know not how, in the soul, is not diverse from things, from space, from light, from time, from man, but one with them, and proceeds obviously from the same source whence their life and being also proceed. We first share the life by which things exist, and afterwards see them as appearances in nature, and forget that we have shared their cause. Here is the fountain of action and of thought. Here are the lungs of that inspiration which giveth man wisdom, and which cannot be denied without impiety and atheism. We lie in the lap of immense intelligence, which makes us receivers of its truth and organs of its activity. When we discern justice, when we discern truth, we do nothing of ourselves, but allow a passage to its beams. If we ask whence this comes, if we seek to pry into the soul that causes, all philosophy is at fault. Its presence or its absence is all we can affirm. Every man discriminates between the voluntary acts of his mind, and his involuntary perceptions, and knows that to his involuntary perceptions a perfect faith is due. He may err in the expression of them, but he knows that these things are so, like day and night, not to be disputed. My wilful actions and acquisitions are but roving; — the idlest reverie, the faintest native emotion, command my curiosity and respect. Thoughtless people contradict as readily the statement of perceptions as of opinions, or rather much more readily; for, they do not distinguish between perception and notion. They fancy that I choose to see this or that thing. But perception is not whimsical, but fatal. If I see a trait, my children will see it after me, and in course of time, all mankind, — although it may chance that no one has seen it before me. For my perception of it is as much a fact as the sun.

The relations of the soul to the divine spirit are so pure, that it is profane to seek to interpose helps. It must be that when God speaketh he should communicate, not one thing, but all things; should fill the world with his voice; should scatter forth light, nature, time, souls, from the centre of the present thought; and new date and new create the whole. Whenever a mind is simple, and receives a divine wisdom, old things pass away, — means, teachers, texts, temples fall; it lives now, and absorbs past and future into the present hour. All things are made sacred by relation to it, — one as much as another. All things are dissolved to their centre by their cause, and, in the universal miracle, petty and particular miracles disappear. If, therefore, a man claims to know and speak of God, and carries you backward to the phraseology of some old mouldered nation in another country, in another world, believe him not. Is the acorn better than the oak which is its fulness and completion? Is the parent better than the child into whom he has cast his ripened being? Whence, then, this worship of the past? The centuries are conspirators against the sanity and authority of the soul. Time and space are but physiological colors which the eye makes, but the soul is light; where it is, is day; where it was, is night; and history is an impertinence and an injury, if it be anything more than a cheerful apologue or parable of my being and becoming.

Man is timid and apologetic; he is no longer upright; 'I think,' 'I am,' that he dares not say, but quotes some saint or sage. He is ashamed before the blade of grass or the blowing rose. These roses under my window make no reference to former roses or to better ones; they are for what they are; they exist with God today. There is no time to them. There is simply the rose; it is perfect in every moment of its existence. Before a leaf bud has burst, its whole life acts; in the full-blown flower there is no more; in the leafless root there is no less. Its nature is satisfied, and it satisfies nature, in all moments alike. But man postpones or remembers; he does not live in the present, but with reverted eye laments the past, or, heedless of the riches that surround him, stands on tiptoe to foresee the future. He cannot be happy and strong until he too lives with nature in the present, above time.

This should be plain enough. Yet see what strong intellects dare not yet hear God himself, unless he speak the phraseology of I know not what David, or Jeremiah, or Paul. We shall not always set so great a price on a few texts, on a few lives. We are like children who repeat by rote the sentences of grandames and tutors, and, as they grow older, of the men of talents and character they chance to see, — painfully recollecting the exact words they spoke; afterwards, when they come into the point of view which those had who uttered these sayings, they understand them, and are willing to let the words go; for, at any time, they can use words as good when occasion comes. If we live truly, we shall see truly. It is as easy for the strong man to be strong, as it is for the weak to be weak. When we have new perception, we shall gladly disburden the memory of its hoarded treasures as old rubbish. When a man lives with God, his voice shall be as sweet as the murmur of the brook and the rustle of the corn.

And now at last the highest truth on this subject remains unsaid; probably cannot be said; for all that we say is the far-off remembering of the intuition. That thought, by what I can now nearest approach to say it, is this. When good is near you, when you have life in yourself, it is not by any known or accustomed way; you shall not discern the foot-prints of any other; not see the face of man; and you shall not hear any name;—— the way, the thought, the good, shall be wholly strange and new. It shall exclude example and experience. You take the way from man, not to man. All persons that ever existed are its forgotten ministers. Fear and hope are alike beneath it. There is somewhat low even in hope. In the hour of vision, there is nothing that can be called gratitude, nor properly joy. The soul raised over passion beholds identity and eternal causation, perceives the self-existence of Truth and Right, and calms itself with knowing that all things go well. Vast spaces of nature, the Atlantic Ocean, the South Sea, — long intervals of time, years, centuries, — are of no account. This which I think and feel underlay every former state of life and circumstances, as it does underlie my present, and what is called life, and what is called death.

Life only avails, not the having lived.

Power ceases in the instant of repose; it resides in the moment of transition from a past to a new state, in the shooting of the gulf, in the darting to an aim. This one fact the world hates is that the soul becomes ; for that forever degrades the past, turns all riches to poverty, all reputation to a shame, confounds the saint with the rogue, shoves Jesus and Judas equally aside. Why, then, do we prate of self-reliance? Inasmuch as the soul is present, there will be power, not confidence but an agent. To talk of reliance is a poor external way of speaking. Speak rather of that which relies, because it works and is. Who has more obedience than I masters me, though he should not raise his finger. Round him I must revolve by the gravitation of spirits. We fancy it rhetoric, when we speak of eminent virtue. We do not yet see that virtue is Height, and that a man or a company of men, plastic and permeable to principles, by the law of nature must overpower and ride all cities, nations, kings, rich men, poets, who are not.

This is the ultimate fact which we so quickly reach on this, as on every topic, the resolution of all into the ever-blessed ONE. Self-existence is the attribute of the Supreme Cause, and it constitutes the measure of good by the degree in which it enters into all lower forms. All things real are so by so much virtue as they contain. Commerce, husbandry, hunting, whaling, war, eloquence , personal weight, are somewhat, and engage my respect as examples of its presence and impure action. I see the same law working in nature for conservation and growth. Power is in nature the essential measure of right. Nature suffers nothing to remain in her kingdoms which cannot help itself. The genesis and maturation of a planet, its poise and orbit, the bended tree recovering itself from the strong wind, the vital resources of every animal and vegetable, are demonstrations of the self-sufficing, and therefore self-relying soul.

Thus all concentrates: let us not rove; let us sit at home with the cause. Let us stun and astonish the intruding rabble of men and books and institutions, by a simple declaration of the divine fact. Bid the invaders take the shoes from off their feet, for God is here within. Let our simplicity judge them, and our docility to our own law demonstrate the poverty of nature and fortune beside our native riches.

But now we are a mob. Man does not stand in awe of man, nor is his genius admonished to stay at home, to put itself in communication with the internal ocean, but it goes abroad to beg a cup of water of the urns of other men. We must go alone. I like the silent church before the service begins, better than any preaching. How far off, how cool, how chaste the persons look, begirt each one with a precinct or sanctuary! So let us always sit. Why should we assume the faults of our friend, or wife, or father, or child, because they sit around our hearth, or are said to have the same blood? All men have my blood, and I have all men's. Not for that will I adopt their petulance or folly, even to the extent of being ashamed of it. But your isolation must not be mechanical, but spiritual, that is, must be elevation. At times the whole world seems to be in conspiracy to importune you with emphatic trifles. Friend, client, child, sickness, fear, want, charity, all knock at once at thy closet door, and say, — 'Come out unto us.' But keep thy state; come not into their confusion. The power men possess to annoy me, I give them by a weak curiosity. No man can come near me but through my act. "What we love that we have, but by desire we bereave ourselves of the love."

If we cannot at once rise to the sanctities of obedience and faith, let us at least resist our temptations; let us enter into the state of war, and wake Thor and Woden, courage and constancy, in our Saxon breasts. This is to be done in our smooth times by speaking the truth. Check this lying hospitality and lying affection. Live no longer to the expectation of these deceived and deceiving people with whom we converse. Say to them, O father, O mother, O wife, O brother, O friend, I have lived with you after appearances hitherto. Henceforward I am the truth's. Be it known unto you that henceforward I obey no law less than the eternal law. I will have no covenants but proximities. To nourish my parents, to support my family I shall endeavour, to be the chaste husband of one wife, — but these relations I must fill after a new and unprecedented way. I appeal from your customs that I must be myself. I cannot break myself any longer for you, or you. If you can love me for what I am, we shall be the happier. If you cannot, I will still seek to deserve that you should. I will not hide my tastes or aversions. I will so trust that what is deep is holy, that I will do strongly before the sun and moon whatever inly rejoices me, and the heart appoints. If you are noble, I will love you; I will not hurt you and myself by hypocritical attentions if you are not. If you are true, but not in the same truth with me, cleave to your companions; I will seek my own. I do this not selfishly, but humbly and truly. It is alike your interest, and mine, and all men's, however long we have dwelt in lies, to live in truth. Does this sound harsh today? You will soon love what is dictated by your nature as well as mine, and, if we follow the truth, it will bring us out safe at last. — But so you may give these friends pain. Yes, but I cannot sell my liberty and my power, to save their sensibility. Besides, all persons have their moments of reason, when they look out into the region of absolute truth; then will they justify me, and do the same thing.

The populace think that your rejection of popular standards is a rejection of all standard, and mere antinomianism; and the bold sensualist will use the name of philosophy to gild his crimes. But the law of consciousness abides. There are two confessionals, in one or the other of which we must be shriven. You may fulfil your round of duties by clearing yourself in the direct , or in the reflex way. Consider whether you have satisfied your relations to father, mother, cousin, neighbour, town, cat, and dog; whether any of these can upbraid you. But I may also neglect this reflex standard, and absolve me to myself. I have my own stern claims and perfect circle. It denies the name of duty to many offices that are called duties. But if I can discharge its debts, it enables me to dispense with the popular code. If anyone imagines that this law is lax, let him keep its commandment one day.

And truly it demands something godlike in him who has cast off the common motives of humanity, and has ventured to trust himself for a taskmaster. High be his heart, faithful his will, clear his sight, that he may in good earnest be doctrine, society, law, to himself, that a simple purpose may be to him as strong as iron necessity is to others!

If any man consider the present aspects of what is called by distinction society , he will see the need of these ethics. The sinew and heart of man seem to be drawn out, and we are become timorous, desponding whimperers. We are afraid of truth, afraid of fortune, afraid of death, and afraid of each other. Our age yields no great and perfect persons. We want men and women who shall renovate life and our social state, but we see that most natures are insolvent, cannot satisfy their own wants, have an ambition out of all proportion to their practical force, and do lean and beg day and night continually. Our housekeeping is mendicant, our arts, our occupations, our marriages, our religion, we have not chosen, but society has chosen for us. We are parlour soldiers. We shun the rugged battle of fate , where strength is born.

If our young men miscarry in their first enterprises, they lose all heart.

Men say he is ruined if the young merchant fails . If the finest genius studies at one of our colleges, and is not installed in an office within one year afterwards in the cities or suburbs of Boston or New York, it seems to his friends and to himself that he is right in being disheartened, and in complaining the rest of his life. A sturdy lad from New Hampshire or Vermont, who in turn tries all the professions, who teams it , farms it , peddles , keeps a school, preaches, edits a newspaper, goes to Congress, buys a township, and so forth, in successive years, and always, like a cat, falls on his feet, is worth a hundred of these city dolls. He walks abreast with his days, and feels no shame in not 'studying a profession,' for he does not postpone his life, but lives already. He has not one chance, but a hundred chances. Let a Stoic open the resources of man, and tell men they are not leaning willows, but can and must detach themselves; that with the exercise of self-trust, new powers shall appear; that a man is the word made flesh, born to shed healing to the nations, that he should be ashamed of our compassion, and that the moment he acts from himself, tossing the laws, the books, idolatries, and customs out of the window, we pity him no more, but thank and revere him, — and that teacher shall restore the life of man to splendor, and make his name dear to all history.

It is easy to see that a greater self-reliance must work a revolution in all the offices and relations of men; in their religion; education; and in their pursuits; their modes of living; their association; in their property; in their speculative views.

1. In what prayers do men allow themselves! That which they call a holy office is not so much as brave and manly. Prayer looks abroad and asks for some foreign addition to come through some foreign virtue, and loses itself in endless mazes of natural and supernatural, and mediatorial and miraculous. It is prayer that craves a particular commodity, — anything less than all good, — is vicious. Prayer is the contemplation of the facts of life from the highest point of view. It is the soliloquy of a beholding and jubilant soul. It is the spirit of God pronouncing his works good. But prayer as a means to effect a private end is meanness and theft. It supposes dualism and not unity in nature and consciousness. As soon as the man is at one with God, he will not beg. He will then see prayer in all action. The prayer of the farmer kneeling in his field to weed it, the prayer of the rower kneeling with the stroke of his oar, are true prayers heard throughout nature, though for cheap ends. Caratach, in Fletcher's Bonduca, when admonished to inquire the mind of the god Audate, replies, —

"His hidden meaning lies in our endeavours; Our valors are our best gods."

Another sort of false prayers are our regrets. Discontent is the want of self-reliance: it is infirmity of will. Regret calamities, if you can thereby help the sufferer; if not, attend your own work, and already the evil begins to be repaired. Our sympathy is just as base. We come to them who weep foolishly, and sit down and cry for company, instead of imparting to them truth and health in rough electric shocks, putting them once more in communication with their own reason. The secret of fortune is joy in our hands. Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man. For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire. Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it. We solicitously and apologetically caress and celebrate him, because he held on his way and scorned our disapprobation. The gods love him because men hated him. "To the persevering mortal," said Zoroaster, "the blessed Immortals are swift."

As men's prayers are a disease of the will, so are their creeds a disease of the intellect . They say with those foolish Israelites, 'Let not God speak to us, lest we die. Speak thou, speak any man with us, and we will obey.' Everywhere I am hindered of meeting God in my brother, because he has shut his own temple doors, and recites fables merely of his brother's, or his brother's brother's God. Every new mind is a new classification. If it prove a mind of uncommon activity and power, a Locke, a Lavoisier, a Hutton, a Bentham, a Fourier, it imposes its classification on other men, and lo! a new system. In proportion to the depth of the thought, and so to the number of the objects it touches and brings within reach of the pupil, is his complacency. But chiefly is this apparent in creeds and churches, which are also classifications of some powerful mind acting on the elemental thought of duty, and man's relation to the Highest. Such as Calvinism, Quakerism, Swedenborgism. The pupil takes the same delight in subordinating everything to the new terminology, as a girl who has just learned botany in seeing a new earth and new seasons thereby. It will happen for a time, that the pupil will find his intellectual power has grown by the study of his master's mind. But in all unbalanced minds, the classification is idolized, passes for the end, and not for a speedily exhaustible means, so that the walls of the system blend to their eye in the remote horizon with the walls of the universe; the luminaries of heaven seem to them hung on the arch their master built. They cannot imagine how you aliens have any right to see, — how you can see; 'It must be somehow that you stole the light from us.' They do not yet perceive, that light, unsystematic, indomitable, will break into any cabin, even into theirs. Let them chirp awhile and call it their own. If they are honest and do well, presently their neat new pinfold will be too strait and low, will crack, will lean, will rot and vanish, and the immortal light, all young and joyful, million-orbed, million-colored, will beam over the universe as on the first morning.

2. It is for want of self-culture that the superstition of Travelling, whose idols are Italy, England, Egypt, retains its fascination for all educated Americans. They who made England, Italy, or Greece venerable in the imagination did so by sticking fast where they were, like an axis of the earth. In manly hours, we feel that duty is our place. The soul is no traveller; the wise man stays at home, and when his necessities, his duties, on any occasion call him from his house, or into foreign lands, he is at home still, and shall make men sensible by the expression of his countenance, that he goes the missionary of wisdom and virtue, and visits cities and men like a sovereign, and not like an interloper or a valet.

I have no churlish objection to the circumnavigation of the globe, for the purposes of art, of study, and benevolence, so that the man is first domesticated, or does not go abroad with the hope of finding somewhat greater than he knows. He who travels to be amused, or to get somewhat which he does not carry, travels away from himself, and grows old even in youth among old things. In Thebes, in Palmyra, his will and mind have become old and dilapidated as they. He carries ruins to ruins.

Travelling is a fool's paradise. Our first journeys discover to us the indifference of places. At home I dream that at Naples, at Rome, I can be intoxicated with beauty, and lose my sadness. I pack my trunk, embrace my friends, embark on the sea, and at last wake up in Naples, and there beside me is the stern fact, the sad self, unrelenting, identical, that I fled from. The Vatican, and the palaces I seek. But I am not intoxicated though I affect to be intoxicated with sights and suggestions. My giant goes with me wherever I go.

3. But the rage of travelling is a symptom of a deeper unsoundness affecting the whole intellectual action. The intellect is vagabond, and our system of education fosters restlessness. Our minds travel when our bodies are forced to stay at home. We imitate, and what is imitation but the travelling of the mind? Our houses are built with foreign taste; Shelves are garnished with foreign ornaments, but our opinions, our tastes, our faculties, lean, and follow the Past and the Distant. The soul created the arts wherever they have flourished. It was in his own mind that the artist sought his model. It was an application of his own thought to the thing to be done and the conditions to be observed. And why need we copy the Doric or the Gothic model? Beauty, convenience, grandeur of thought, and quaint expression are as near to us as to any, and if the American artist will study with hope and love the precise thing to be done by him, considering the climate, the soil, the length of the day, the wants of the people, the habit and form of the government, he will create a house in which all these will find themselves fitted, and taste and sentiment will be satisfied also.

Insist on yourself; never imitate. Your own gift you can present every moment with the cumulative force of a whole life's cultivation, but of the adopted talent of another, you have only an extemporaneous, half possession. That which each can do best, none but his Maker can teach him. No man yet knows what it is, nor can, till that person has exhibited it. Where is the master who could have taught Shakespeare? Where is the master who could have instructed Franklin, or Washington, or Bacon, or Newton? Every great man is a unique. The Scipionism of Scipio is precisely that part he could not borrow. Shakespeare will never be made by the study of Shakespeare. Do that which is assigned you, and you cannot hope too much or dare too much. There is at this moment for you an utterance brave and grand as that of the colossal chisel of Phidias, or trowel of the Egyptians, or the pen of Moses, or Dante, but different from all these. Not possibly will the soul all rich, all eloquent, with thousand-cloven tongue, deign to repeat itself; but if you can hear what these patriarchs say, surely you can reply to them in the same pitch of voice; for the ear and the tongue are two organs of one nature. Abide in the simple and noble regions of thy life, obey thy heart, and thou shalt reproduce the Foreworld again.

4. As our Religion, our Education, our Art look abroad, so does our spirit of society. All men plume themselves on the improvement of society, and no man improves.

Society never advances. It recedes as fast on one side as it gains on the other and undergoes continual changes; it is barbarous,  civilized, christianized, rich and it is scientific, but this change is not amelioration. For everything that is given, something is taken. Society acquires new arts, and loses old instincts. What a contrast between the well-clad, reading, writing, thinking American, with a watch, a pencil, and a bill of exchange in his pocket, and the naked New Zealander, whose property is a club, a spear, a mat, and an undivided twentieth of a shed to sleep under! But compare the health of the two men, and you shall see that the white man has lost his aboriginal strength. If the traveller tell us truly, strike the savage with a broad axe, and in a day or two, the flesh shall unite and heal as if you struck the blow into soft pitch, and the same blow shall send the white to his grave.

The civilized man has built a coach, but has lost the use of his feet. He is supported on crutches, but lacks so much support of muscle. He has a fine Geneva watch, but he fails of the skill to tell the hour by the sun. A Greenwich nautical almanac he has, and so being sure of the information when he wants it, the man in the street does not know a star in the sky. The solstice he does not observe, the equinox he knows as little, and the whole bright calendar of the year are without a dial in his mind. His note-books impair his memory; his libraries overload his wit; the insurance office increases the number of accidents; and it may be a question whether machinery does not encumber; whether we have not lost by refinement some energy, by a Christianity entrenched in establishments and forms, some vigor of wild virtue. For every Stoic was a Stoic, but in Christendom, where is the Christian?

There is no more deviation in the moral standard than in the standard of height or bulk. No greater men are now than ever were. A singular equality may be observed between the great men of the first and of the last ages; nor can all the science, art, religion, and philosophy of the nineteenth century avail to educate greater men than Plutarch's heroes, three or four and twenty centuries ago. Not in time is the race progressive. Phocion, Socrates, Anaxagoras, Diogenes, are great men, but they leave no class. He who is really of their class will not be called by their name, but will be his own man, and, in his turn, the founder of a sect. The arts and inventions of each period are only its costume, and do not invigorate men. The harm of the improved machinery may compensate its good. Hudson and Behring accomplished so much in their fishing boats, as to astonish Parry and Franklin, whose equipment exhausted the resources of science and art. Galileo, with an opera-glass, discovered a more splendid series of celestial phenomena than anyone since. Columbus found the New World in an undecked boat. It is curious to see the periodical disuse and perishing of means and machinery, which were introduced with loud laudation a few years or centuries before. The great genius returns to essential man. We reckoned the improvements of the art of war among the triumphs of science, and yet Napoleon conquered Europe by the bivouac, which consisted of falling back on naked valor and disencumbering it of all aids. The Emperor held it impossible to make a perfect army, says Las Casas, "without abolishing our arms, magazines, commissaries, and carriages, until, in imitation of the Roman custom, the soldier should receive his supply of corn, grind it in his hand-mill, and bake his bread himself."

Society is a wave. The wave moves onward, but the water of which it is composed does not. The same particle does not rise from the valley to the ridge. Its unity is only phenomenal. The persons who make up a nation today, next year die, and their experience with them.

And so the reliance on Property, including the reliance on governments which protect it, is the want of self-reliance. Men have looked away from themselves and at things so long, that they have come to esteem the religious, learned, and civil institutions as guards of property, and they deprecate assaults on these, because they feel them to be assaults on property. They measure their esteem of each other by what each has, and not by what each is. But a cultivated man becomes ashamed of his property, out of new respect for his nature. Especially he hates what he has, if he see that it is accidental, — came to him by inheritance, or gift, or crime; then he feels that it is not having; it does not belong to him, has no root in him, and merely lies there, because no revolution or no robber takes it away. But that which a man is does always by necessity acquire, and what the man acquires is living property, which does not wait the beck of rulers, or mobs, or revolutions, or fire, or storm, or bankruptcies, but perpetually renews itself wherever the man breathes. "Thy lot or portion of life," said the Caliph Ali, "is seeking after thee; therefore, be at rest from seeking after it." Our dependence on these foreign goods leads us to our slavish respect for numbers. The political parties meet in numerous conventions; the greater the concourse, and with each new uproar of announcement, The delegation from Essex! The Democrats from New Hampshire! The Whigs of Maine! the young patriot feels himself stronger than before by a new thousand of eyes and arms. In like manner the reformers summon conventions, and vote and resolve in multitude. Not so, O friends! will the God deign to enter and inhabit you, but by a method precisely the reverse. It is only as a man puts off all foreign support, and stands alone, that I see him to be strong and to prevail. He is weaker by every recruit to his banner. Is not a man better than a town? Ask nothing of men, and in the endless mutation, thou only firm column must presently appear the upholder of all that surrounds thee. He who knows that power is inborn, that he is weak because he has looked for good out of him and elsewhere, and so perceiving, throws himself unhesitatingly on his thought, instantly rights himself, stands in the erect position, commands his limbs, works miracles; just as a man who stands on his feet is stronger than a man who stands on his head.

So use all that is called Fortune. Most men gamble with her, and gain all, and lose all, as her wheel rolls. But do thou leave as unlawful these winnings, and deal with Cause and Effect, the chancellors of God. In the Will work and acquire, and thou hast chained the wheel of Chance, and shalt sit hereafter out of fear from her rotations. A political victory, a rise of rents, the recovery of your sick, or the return of your absent friend, or some other favorable event, raises your spirits, and you think good days are preparing for you. Do not believe it. Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. Nothing can bring you peace but the triumph of principles.

Which quotation from "Self-reliance" best summarizes Emerson’s view on belief in oneself?

One of the most famous quotes from Ralph Waldo Emerson's "Self-Reliance" that summarizes his view on belief in oneself is:

"Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string."

What does Emerson argue should be the basis of human actions in the second paragraph of “self-reliance”?

In the second paragraph of "Self-Reliance," Emerson argues that individual conscience, or a person's inner voice, should be the basis of human actions. He writes, "Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist." He believes that society tends to impose conformity and discourage people from following their own inner truth and intuition. Emerson encourages individuals to trust themselves and to act according to their own beliefs, instead of being influenced by the opinions of others. He argues that this is the way to live a truly authentic and fulfilling life.

Which statement best describes Emerson’s opinion of communities, according to the first paragraph of society and solitude?

According to the first paragraph of Ralph Waldo Emerson's " Society and Solitude, " Emerson has a mixed opinion of communities. He recognizes the importance of social interaction and the benefits of being part of a community but also recognizes the limitations that come with it.

He writes, "Society everywhere is in a conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members." He argues that society can be limiting and restrictive, and can cause individuals to conform to norms and values that may not align with their own beliefs and desires. He believes that it is important for individuals to strike a balance between the benefits of social interaction and the need for solitude and self-discovery.

Which best describes Emerson’s central message to his contemporaries in "self-reliance"?

Ralph Waldo Emerson's central message to his contemporaries in "Self-Reliance" is to encourage individuals to trust in their own beliefs and instincts, and to break free from societal norms and expectations. He argues that individuals should have the courage to think for themselves and to live according to their own individual truth, rather than being influenced by the opinions of others. Through this message, he aims to empower people to live authentic and fulfilling lives, rather than living in conformity and compromise.

Yet, it is critical that we first possess the ability to conceive our own thoughts. Prior to venturing into the world, we must be intimately acquainted with our own selves and our individual minds. This sentiment echoes the concise maxim inscribed at the ancient Greek site of the Delphic Oracle: 'Know Thyself.'

In essence, Emerson's central message in "Self-Reliance" is to promote self-reliance and individualism as the key to a meaningful and purposeful life.

Understanding Emerson: "The American scholar" and his struggle for self-reliance.

Princeton University Press. ISBN 0-691-09982-0

Standford Encyclopedia of Philosophy

Other works from ralph waldo emerson for book clubs, the over-soul.

There is a difference between one and another hour of life, in their authority and subsequent effect. Our faith comes in moments; our vice is habitual.

The American Scholar

An Oration delivered before the Phi Beta Kappa Society, at Cambridge, August 31, 1837

Essays First Series

Essays: First Series First published in 1841 as Essays. After Essays: Second Series was published in 1844, Emerson corrected this volume and republished it in 1847 as Essays: First Series.

Emerson's Essays

Research the collective works of Ralph Waldo Emerson. Read More Essay

Self-Reliance

Emerson's most famous work that can truly change your life. Check it out

Early Emerson Poems

America's best known and best-loved poems. More Poems

More From Forbes

Top 3 leadership characteristics necessary to support occupational well-being.

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Three characteristics define occupational well-being, according to experts.

Occupational well-being is a critical concern in the U.S. and globally. According to Gallup, 44% of workers worldwide report experiencing workplace stress, a statistic that has remained relatively unchanged since 2020. Leadership plays a pivotal role in mental well-being and stress at work and can significantly shape an employee’s life.

Leaders directly engage with employees on a daily basis. Their behavior, decisions and communication styles significantly shape employee work experiences and overall well-being. Although organizations globally are increasingly implementing initiatives such as flexible work arrangements and wellness programs to support well-being, the primary responsibility for mental wellness lies with leaders.

The Power Of ‘Mattering’

If effective leadership could summed up in one word it would be “ mattering ”—a construct from social psychology that means employees feel they make a difference and have value in the workplace. Studies on “mattering” at work show that if you feel recognized and valued and your employer appreciates your efforts, you’re at lower risk of work stress, burnout and mental health issues. Plus, you’re more engaged and productive and add value to the company’s bottom line. Unfortunately, though, a survey from Workhuman found that nearly half of workers only felt ‘somewhat valued’. And as “productivity paranoia” continues to overwhelm workers, 31.1% say they feel pressured not to take breaks and to seem more proactive with 29.2% feeling concerned that it never seems like they’re doing enough.

Ryne Sherman, Hogan Assessment expert, explains that “Occupational well-being reflects how an individual's professional life impacts their sense of purpose and meaning—a matter that has become increasingly urgent post-Covid-19, as remote work blurs the boundaries between personal and professional.” Critical factors contributing to occupational well-being include mental and emotional support from leaders and employers, a sense of purpose at work, personal support from leaders and financial stability.

Three Essential Skills For Effective Leadership

For individuals who may not inherently possess leadership traits, those skills can be trained. Hogan Assessments contends that leadership comprises a combination of personality traits, behaviors and skills that can be developed over time through self-awareness, learning and practice. Hogan Assessments , global leader in workplace personality assessments, has identified the three most important characteristics you need for effective leadership to support occupational well-being.

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• Interpersonal Sensitivity. Leaders adept at understanding and empathizing with their team members' emotions foster strong relationships, conflict resolution and positive interactions, enhancing overall employee well-being.
• Emotional Intelligence (EQ) . Leaders with high emotional intelligence create psychologically safe environments where employees feel comfortable expressing themselves, thereby promoting open communication and enhancing occupational well-being.
• Strategic Self-Awareness. Leaders who understand their strengths and limitations and their impact on others can adapt their leadership style to prioritize activities conducive to employee well-being, fostering a positive work environment.

According to Hogan, American leaders stand out for their individualistic mindset, innovative approach, technological proficiency and commitment to diversity, setting them apart from their counterparts around the world. “They stand out for their emphasis on individualism and independence, reflecting cultural values of personal achievement and autonomy,” Sherman elaborates. “This translates into their leadership styles, where they prioritize self-expression and autonomy in decision-making. They're known for embracing risks and change, fostering a dynamic business environment. This sets them apart from leaders elsewhere who may be more conservative.”

Making Yourself Matter At Work

“Bad leaders perpetrate terrible misery on those subject to their domain,” states Robert Hogan, founder of Hogan Assessments. “However, it is important to note that individuals are responsible for their happiness and well-being and employers cannot be held solely responsible. In fact, it's a joint effort—employees must safeguard their well-being and employers should provide well-being support, mitigate stressors and foster a work environment that is conducive to happiness.”

We all want to feel that we matter for the hard work we do. Mattering in the workplace is more important today than ever, given the prevalence of remote working and the return-to-office tug-of-war between employers and employees. But it’s a two-way street. Employees must let their value be shown, but employers must implement actions that recognize and reward those performances. One study found that 84% out of 1,000 respondents said going above and beyond at work is a must to achieve a successful career. Remote employees who feel unseen are more likely to experience feelings of burnout, loneliness and imposter syndrome—which translates into feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt—all of which can be detrimental to both employees and their work.

Knowing how to get noticed at work and making yourself known as an employee can enhance your visibility. Then, it’s in the hands of business leaders to take the responsibility for their part to create “mattering” for their employees. And, according to the experts, leaders can make that happen by implementing interpersonal sensitivity, emotional intelligence and strategic self-awareness.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Being Yourself — The Importance of Being Yourself

The Importance of Being Yourself

• Categories: Being Yourself

About this sample

Words: 1004 |

Published: Sep 25, 2018

Words: 1004 | Pages: 2 | 6 min read

Works Cited

• Amato, P. R. (2010). The Importance of Feeling Beautiful: The Body and the Social Self in Adolescence. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 20(4), 866-887.
• Blommaert, J. (2010). The Sociolinguistics of Globalization. Cambridge University Press.
• Caillat, C. (2007). Try. On Coco (Deluxe Edition) [CD]. Universal Republic.
• Cash, T. F., & Pruzinsky, T. (2002). Body Image: A Handbook of Science, Practice, and Prevention. The Guilford Press.
• Dove Campaign for Real Beauty. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.dove.com/us/en/dove-self-esteem-project.html
• Mars, B. (2010). Just the Way You Are. On Doo-Wops & Hooligans [CD]. Elektra.
• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
• Neumark-Sztainer, D., Paxton, S. J., Hannan, P. J., Haines, J., & Story, M. (2006). Does Body Satisfaction Matter? Five-year Longitudinal Associations between Body Satisfaction and Health Behaviors in Adolescent Females and Males. Journal of Adolescent Health, 39(2), 244-251.
• Nock, M. K., Borges, G., Bromet, E. J., Cha, C. B., Kessler, R. C., & Lee, S. (2008). Suicide and Suicidal Behavior. Epidemiologic Reviews, 30(1), 133-154.
• Star Light, Star Bright Foundation. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://starlightstarbright.org/

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• Risk Factors
• Resources to Share
• #SunSafeSelfie
• Real Stories
• What CDC Is Doing About Skin Cancer
• Benefits to Spending Time Outdoors
• Guidelines for School Programs to Prevent Skin Cancer

Sun Safety Facts

What to know.

Most skin cancers are caused by too much exposure to ultraviolet (UV) light. Protection from UV rays is important all year.

Spending time outside is a great way to be physically active, reduce stress, and get vitamin D. You can work and play outside without raising your skin cancer risk by protecting your skin from the sun.

Most skin cancers are caused by too much exposure to ultraviolet (UV) light. UV rays are an invisible kind of radiation that comes from the sun, tanning beds, and sunlamps. UV rays can damage skin cells.

Protection from UV rays is important all year, not just during the summer. UV rays can reach you on cloudy and cool days, and they reflect off of surfaces like water, cement, sand, and snow. In the continental United States, UV rays tend to be strongest from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. daylight saving time (9 a.m. to 3 p.m. standard time).

The UV Index forecasts the strength of UV rays each day. If the UV index is 3 or higher in your area, protect your skin from too much exposure to the sun.

What You Need to Know about Sun Safety

Skin cancer is the most common cancer in the United States. Too much sun can cause skin cancer. This video explains how to protect your skin from the sun.

How to protect your skin from the sun

You can reduce your risk of sun damage and skin cancer by staying in the shade under an umbrella, tree, or other shelter. Your best bet to protect your skin is to use sunscreen or wear protective clothing when you're outside—even when you're in the shade.

When possible, wear long-sleeved shirts and long pants and skirts, which can provide protection from UV rays. If wearing this type of clothing isn't practical, try to wear a T-shirt or a beach cover-up. Clothes made from tightly woven fabric offer the best protection. A wet T-shirt offers much less UV protection than a dry one, and darker colors may offer more protection than lighter colors. Some clothing is certified under international standards as offering UV protection.

For the most protection, wear a hat that has a brim all the way around that shades your face, your ears, and the back of your neck. A tightly woven fabric, such as canvas, works best to protect your skin from UV rays. Avoid straw hats with holes that let sunlight through. A darker hat may offer more UV protection.

If you wear a baseball cap, you should also protect your ears and the back of your neck by wearing clothing that covers those areas, using sunscreen, or staying in the shade.

Sunglasses protect your eyes from UV rays and reduce the risk of cataracts. They also protect the tender skin around your eyes from sun exposure.

Sunglasses that block both UVA and UVB rays offer the best protection. Most sunglasses sold in the United States, regardless of cost, meet this standard. Wrap-around sunglasses work best because they block UV rays from sneaking in from the side.

Put on broad spectrum sunscreen that filters out both UVA and UVB rays and has an SPF of 15 or higher before you go outside. Don't forget to put a thick layer on all exposed skin. Get help for hard-to-reach places like your back. And remember, sunscreen works best when combined with other options.

Sunscreen is not recommended for babies who are 6 months old or younger. The US Food and Drug Administration recommends keeping infants out of the sun during midday and using protective clothing if they have to be in the sun.

SPF. Sunscreens are assigned a sun protection factor (SPF), which is a number that rates how well they filter out UV rays. Higher numbers indicate more protection. You should use a broad spectrum sunscreen with SPF of 15 or higher.

Reapplication. Sunscreen wears off. Put it on again if you stay out in the sun for more than 2 hours and after swimming, sweating, or toweling off.

Expiration date. Check the sunscreen's expiration date. Sunscreen without an expiration date has a shelf life of no more than 3 years. Its shelf life is shorter if it has been exposed to high temperatures.

Sun Safety Tips Videos

Dawn Holman, CDC Behavioral Scientist, talks about the importance of applying the following as a part of a sun safety strategy.

• Use Sunscreen .
• Wear a Hat .
• Seek Shade .
• Wear Clothing that Covers .
• Plan Activities for Morning, Late Afternoon and Evening .

Sun safety tips for schools

Recess and other outdoor activities during the day can put students at risk if their skin isn’t protected from too much exposure to the sun. Teachers and school administrators can take steps to protect students from getting skin cancer later in life.

Increase shade

• Provide shade structures or trees.
• Move outdoor activities to shaded areas.
• Plan for shade when developing or renovating school buildings, playgrounds, or athletic fields.

Promote sun-safe behaviors

• Encourage students to wear hats, sunglasses, and sunscreen outdoors.
• Try to avoid scheduling outdoor activities when the sun is strongest.
• Provide breaks during outdoor activities so that students can reapply sunscreen and get water.

Use proven educational programs

Proven skin cancer prevention interventions and educational programs are available for child care centers and schools. The National Cancer Institute's Evidence-Based Cancer Control Programs website lists sun-safety programs for schools.

Sun safety tips for employers

The Occupational Safety and Health Act requires employers to minimize risk of harm to workers. Employers may be required to provide workers’ compensation to employees who get skin cancer because of sun exposure on the job.

Skin cancer can greatly reduce workers’ productivity. Every year, Americans lose more than $100 million in productivity because of restricted activity or absence from work due to skin cancer.

Providing sun protection for outdoor workers helps create a healthy and safe workplace. It can also increase productivity, which saves money. Some of the tips below protect outdoor workers from heat as well as sun exposure.

Increase sun protection for employees

• Encourage sun safety among your employees and provide sun protection when possible.
• Use tents, shelters, and cooling stations to provide shade at worksites.
• Schedule breaks in the shade and allow workers to reapply sunscreen throughout their shifts.
• Create work schedules that minimize sun exposure. For example, schedule outdoor tasks like mowing for early morning instead of noon, and rotate workers to reduce their UV exposure.

Add sun safety to workplace policies and training

• Include sun-safety information in workplace wellness programs. The National Cancer Institute's Evidence-Based Cancer Control Programs website lists sun safety programs for outdoor worksites.
• Teach outdoor workers about the risks of exposure to UV rays and the symptoms of overexposure.

Skin Cancer

To lower your skin cancer risk, protect your skin from the sun and avoid tanning.

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JEE Advanced 2024: Important instructions, admit card and other details

Iit madras is conducting the joint entrance exam (jee) advanced 2024 today, may 26. the examination consists of two papers, paper 1 and paper 2, held in two shifts. paper 1 commenced at 9 am and will conclude at 12 pm, while paper 2 is slated to take place from 2:30 pm to 5:30 pm..

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• JEE Advanced 2024 is being held today
• Nearly 1.91 lakh candidates are appearing for the JEE Advanced 2024 this year
• The final answer key and results will be declared online on June 9

The Joint Entrance Exam (JEE) Advanced 2024 is being conducted today, May 26, by the Indian Institute of Technology (IIT) Madras, comprising two papers conducted in two shifts. Paper 1 is being held from 9 am to 12 pm, followed by Paper 2 from 2:30 pm to 5:30 pm.

The examination will cover topics from physics, chemistry, and mathematics. Candidates are reminded to bring a printed copy of their admit card for entry into the examination hall. The admit cards can be downloaded from the official website, jeeadv.ac.in.

LIST OF BANNED ITEMS AT EXAM CENTRE

Candidates appearing for the JEE Advanced 2024 exam must adhere to a strict set of regulations regarding prohibited items within the examination centre. Among the items not allowed are watches, mobile phones, Bluetooth devices, earphones, microphones, pagers, health bands, and any other electronic gadgets. Additionally, candidates are barred from bringing any printed, blank, or handwritten papers, log tables, writing pads, scales, erasers, geometry or pencil boxes, pouches, calculators, pen drives, electronic pens, scanners, wallets, handbags, cameras, and goggles. Compliance with these guidelines ensures the integrity and fairness of the examination process.

This year, 3 additional cities were included as exam centres for JEE (Advanced) 2024, as stated on the jeeadv.ac. website. Candidates had the option to select from Abu Dhabi, Dubai, and Kathmandu alongside other existing cities.

According to an announcement by IIT Madras, feedback and comments on provisional answer keys for the JEE Advanced 2024 examination will be accepted from June 2 to June 3.