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College Essays

Just as there are noteworthy examples of excellent college essays that admissions offices like to publish, so are there cringe-worthy examples of terrible college essays that end up being described by anonymous admissions officers on Reddit discussion boards.

While I won't guarantee that your essay will end up in the first category, I will say that you follow my advice in this article, your essay most assuredly won't end up in the second. How do you avoid writing a bad admissions essay? Read on to find out what makes an essay bad and to learn which college essay topics to avoid. I'll also explain how to recognize bad college essays—and what to do to if you end up creating one by accident.

What Makes Bad College Essays Bad

What exactly happens to turn a college essay terrible? Just as great personal statements combine an unexpected topic with superb execution, flawed personal statements compound problematic subject matter with poor execution.

Problems With the Topic

The primary way to screw up a college essay is to flub what the essay is about or how you've decided to discuss a particular experience. Badly chosen essay content can easily create an essay that is off-putting in one of a number of ways I'll discuss in the next section.

The essay is the place to let the admissions office of your target college get to know your personality, character, and the talents and skills that aren't on your transcript. So if you start with a terrible topic, not only will you end up with a bad essay, but you risk ruining the good impression that the rest of your application makes.

Some bad topics show admissions officers that you don't have a good sense of judgment or maturity , which is a problem since they are building a class of college students who have to be able to handle independent life on campus.

Other bad topics suggest that you are a boring person , or someone who doesn't process your experience in a colorful or lively way, which is a problem since colleges want to create a dynamic and engaged cohort of students.

Still other bad topics indicate that you're unaware of or disconnected from the outside world and focused only on yourself , which is a problem since part of the point of college is to engage with new people and new ideas, and admissions officers are looking for people who can do that.

Problems With the Execution

Sometimes, even if the experiences you discuss could be the foundation of a great personal statement, the way you've structured and put together your essay sends up warning flags. This is because the admissions essay is also a place to show the admissions team the maturity and clarity of your writing style.

One way to get this part wrong is to exhibit very faulty writing mechanics , like unclear syntax or incorrectly used punctuation. This is a problem since college-ready writing is one of the things that's expected from a high school graduate.

Another way to mess this up is to ignore prompt instructions either for creative or careless reasons. This can show admissions officers that you're either someone who simply blows off directions and instructions or someone who can't understand how to follow them . Neither is a good thing, since they are looking for people who are open to receiving new information from professors and not just deciding they know everything already.

College Essay Topics To Avoid

Want to know why you're often advised to write about something mundane and everyday for your college essay? That's because the more out-there your topic, the more likely it is to stumble into one of these trouble categories.

Too Personal

The problem with the overly personal essay topic is that revealing something very private can show that you don't really understand boundaries . And knowing where appropriate boundaries are will be key for living on your own with a bunch of people not related to you.

Unfortunately, stumbling into the TMI zone of essay topics is more common than you think. One quick test for checking your privacy-breaking level: if it's not something you'd tell a friendly stranger sitting next to you on the plane, maybe don't tell it to the admissions office.

• Describing losing your virginity, or anything about your sex life really. This doesn't mean you can't write about your sexual orientation—just leave out the actual physical act.
• Writing in too much detail about your illness, disability, any other bodily functions. Detailed meaningful discussion of what this physical condition has meant to you and your life is a great thing to write about. But stay away from body horror and graphic descriptions that are simply there for gratuitous shock value.
• Waxing poetic about your love for your significant other. Your relationship is adorable to the people currently involved in it, but those who don't know you aren't invested in this aspect of your life.
• Confessing to odd and unusual desires of the sexual or illegal variety. Your obsession with cultivating cacti is wonderful topic, while your obsession with researching explosives is a terrible one.

Too Revealing of Bad Judgment

Generally speaking, leave past illegal or immoral actions out of your essay . It's simply a bad idea to give admissions officers ammunition to dislike you.

Some exceptions might be if you did something in a very, very different mindset from the one you're in now (in the midst of escaping from danger, under severe coercion, or when you were very young, for example). Or if your essay is about explaining how you've turned over a new leaf and you have the transcript to back you up.

• Writing about committing crime as something fun or exciting. Unless it's on your permanent record, and you'd like a chance to explain how you've learned your lesson and changed, don't put this in your essay.
• Describing drug use or the experience of being drunk or high. Even if you're in a state where some recreational drugs are legal, you're a high school student. Your only exposure to mind-altering substances should be caffeine.
• Making up fictional stories about yourself as though they are true. You're unlikely to be a good enough fantasist to pull this off, and there's no reason to roll the dice on being discovered to be a liar.
• Detailing your personality flaws. Unless you have a great story of coping with one of these, leave deal-breakers like pathological narcissism out of your personal statement.

Too Overconfident

While it's great to have faith in your abilities, no one likes a relentless show-off. No matter how magnificent your accomplishments, if you decide to focus your essay on them, it's better to describe a setback or a moment of doubt rather that simply praising yourself to the skies.

• Bragging and making yourself the flawless hero of your essay. This goes double if you're writing about not particularly exciting achievements like scoring the winning goal or getting the lead in the play.
• Having no awareness of the actual scope of your accomplishments. It's lovely that you take time to help others, but volunteer-tutoring a couple of hours a week doesn't make you a saintly figure.

Too Clichéd or Boring

Remember your reader. In this case, you're trying to make yourself memorable to an admissions officer who has been reading thousands of other essays . If your essay makes the mistake of being boring or trite, it just won't register in that person's mind as anything worth paying attention to.

• Transcribing your resume into sentence form or writing about the main activity on your transcript. The application already includes your resume, or a detailed list of your various activities. Unless the prompt specifically asks you to write about your main activity, the essay needs to be about a facet of your interests and personality that doesn't come through the other parts of the application.
• Writing about sports. Every athlete tries to write this essay. Unless you have a completely off-the-wall story or unusual achievement, leave this overdone topic be.
• Being moved by your community service trip to a third-world country. Were you were impressed at how happy the people seemed despite being poor? Did you learn a valuable lesson about how privileged you are? Unfortunately, so has every other teenager who traveled on one of these trips. Writing about this tends to simultaneously make you sound unempathetic, clueless about the world, way over-privileged, and condescending. Unless you have a highly specific, totally unusual story to tell, don't do it.
• Reacting with sadness to a sad, but very common experience. Unfortunately, many of the hard, formative events in your life are fairly universal. So, if you're going to write about death or divorce, make sure to focus on how you dealt with this event, so the essay is something only you could possibly have written. Only detailed, idiosyncratic description can save this topic.
• Going meta. Don't write about the fact that you're writing the essay as we speak, and now the reader is reading it, and look, the essay is right here in the reader's hand. It's a technique that seems clever, but has already been done many times in many different ways.
• Offering your ideas on how to fix the world. This is especially true if your solution is an easy fix, if only everyone would just listen to you. Trust me, there's just no way you are being realistically appreciative of the level of complexity inherent in the problem you're describing.
• Starting with a famous quotation. There usually is no need to shore up your own words by bringing in someone else's. Of course, if you are writing about a particular phrase that you've adopted as a life motto, feel free to include it. But even then, having it be the first line in your essay feels like you're handing the keys over to that author and asking them to drive.
• Using an everyday object as a metaphor for your life/personality. "Shoes. They are like this, and like that, and people love them for all of these reasons. And guess what? They are just like me."

Too Off-Topic

Unlike the essays you've been writing in school where the idea is to analyze something outside of yourself, the main subject of your college essay should be you, your background, your makeup, and your future . Writing about someone or something else might well make a great essay, but not for this context.

• Paying tribute to someone very important to you. Everyone would love to meet your grandma, but this isn't the time to focus on her amazing coming of age story. If you do want to talk about a person who is important to your life, dwell on the ways you've been impacted by them, and how you will incorporate this impact into your future.
• Documenting how well other people do things, say things, are active, while you remain passive and inactive in the essay. Being in the orbit of someone else's important lab work, or complex stage production, or meaningful political activism is a fantastic learning moment. But if you decide to write about, your essay should be about your learning and how you've been influenced, not about the other person's achievements.
• Concentrating on a work of art that deeply moved you. Watch out for the pitfall of writing an analytical essay about that work, and not at all about your reaction to it or how you've been affected since. Check out our explanation of how to answer Topic D of the ApplyTexas application to get some advice on writing about someone else's work while making sure your essay still points back at you.

(Image: Pieter Christoffel Wonder [Public domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

Too Offensive

With this potential mistake, you run the risk of showing a lack of self-awareness or the ability to be open to new ideas . Remember, no reader wants to be lectured at. If that's what your essay does, you are demonstrating an inability to communicate successfully with others.

Also, remember that no college is eager to admit someone who is too close-minded to benefit from being taught by others. A long, one-sided essay about a hot-button issue will suggest that you are exactly that.

• Ranting at length about political, religious, or other contentious topics. You simply don't know where the admissions officer who reads your essay stands on any of these issues. It's better to avoid upsetting or angering that person.
• Writing a one-sided diatribe about guns, abortion, the death penalty, immigration, or anything else in the news. Even if you can marshal facts in your argument, this essay is simply the wrong place to take a narrow, unempathetic side in an ongoing debate.
• Mentioning anything negative about the school you're applying to. Again, your reader is someone who works there and presumably is proud of the place. This is not the time to question the admissions officer's opinions or life choices.

College Essay Execution Problems To Avoid

Bad college essays aren't only caused by bad topics. Sometimes, even if you're writing about an interesting, relevant topic, you can still seem immature or unready for college life because of the way you present that topic—the way you actually write your personal statement. Check to make sure you haven't made any of the common mistakes on this list.

Tone-Deafness

Admissions officers are looking for resourcefulness, the ability to be resilient, and an active and optimistic approach to life —these are all qualities that create a thriving college student. Essays that don't show these qualities are usually suffering from tone-deafness.

• Being whiny or complaining about problems in your life. Is the essay about everyone doing things to/against you? About things happening to you, rather than you doing anything about them? That perspective is a definite turn-off.
• Trying and failing to use humor. You may be very funny in real life, but it's hard to be successfully funny in this context, especially when writing for a reader who doesn't know you. If you do want to use humor, I'd recommend the simplest and most straightforward version: being self-deprecating and low-key.
• Talking down to the reader, or alternately being self-aggrandizing. No one enjoys being condescended to. In this case, much of the function of your essay is to charm and make yourself likable, which is unlikely to happen if you adopt this tone.
• Being pessimistic, cynical, and generally depressive. You are applying to college because you are looking forward to a future of learning, achievement, and self-actualization. This is not the time to bust out your existential ennui and your jaded, been-there-done-that attitude toward life.

(Image: Eduard Munch [Public Domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

Lack of Personality

One good question to ask yourself is: could anyone else have written this essay ? If the answer is yes, then you aren't doing a good job of representing your unique perspective on the world. It's very important to demonstrate your ability to be a detailed observer of the world, since that will be one of your main jobs as a college student.

• Avoiding any emotions, and appearing robot-like and cold in the essay. Unlike essays that you've been writing for class, this essay is meant to be a showcase of your authorial voice and personality. It may seem strange to shift gears after learning how to take yourself out of your writing, but this is the place where you have to put as much as yourself in as possible.
• Skipping over description and specific details in favor of writing only in vague generalities. Does your narrative feel like a newspaper horoscope, which could apply to every other person who was there that day? Then you're doing it wrong and need to refocus on your reaction, feelings, understanding, and transformation.

Off-Kilter Style

There's some room for creativity here, yes, but a college essay isn't a free-for-all postmodern art class . True, there are prompts that specifically call for your most out-of-left-field submission, or allow you to submit a portfolio or some other work sample instead of a traditional essay. But on a standard application, it's better to stick to traditional prose, split into paragraphs, further split into sentences.

• Submitting anything other than just the materials asked for on your application. Don't send food to the admissions office, don't write your essay on clothing or shoes, don't create a YouTube channel about your undying commitment to the school. I know there are a lot of urban legends about "that one time this crazy thing worked," but they are either not true or about something that will not work a second time.
• Writing your essay in verse, in the form of a play, in bullet points, as an acrostic, or any other non-prose form. Unless you really have a way with poetry or playwriting, and you are very confident that you can meet the demands of the prompt and explain yourself well in this form, don't discard prose simply for the sake of being different.
• Using as many "fancy" words as possible and getting very far away from sounding like yourself. Admissions officers are unanimous in wanting to hear your not fully formed teenage voice in your essay. This means that you should write at the top of your vocabulary range and syntax complexity, but don't trade every word up for a thesaurus synonym. Your essay will suffer for it.

Failure to Proofread

Most people have a hard time checking over their own work. This is why you have to make sure that someone else proofreads your writing . This is the one place where you can, should—and really must—get someone who knows all about grammar, punctuation and has a good eye for detail to take a red pencil to your final draft.

Otherwise, you look like you either don't know the basic rules or writing (in which case, are you really ready for college work?) or don't care enough to present yourself well (in which case, why would the admissions people care about admitting you?).

• Typos, grammatical mistakes, punctuation flubs, weird font/paragraph spacing issues. It's true that these are often unintentional mistakes. But caring about getting it right is a way to demonstrate your work ethic and dedication to the task at hand.
• Going over the word limit. Part of showing your brilliance is being able to work within arbitrary rules and limitations. Going over the word count points to a lack of self-control, which is not a very attractive feature in a college applicant.
• Repeating the same word(s) or sentence structure over and over again. This makes your prose monotonous and hard to read.

Bad College Essay Examples—And How to Fix Them

The beauty of writing is that you get to rewrite. So if you think of your essay as a draft waiting to be revised into a better version rather than as a precious jewel that can't bear being touched, you'll be in far better shape to correct the issues that always crop up!

Now let's take a look at some actual college essay drafts to see where the writer is going wrong and how the issue could be fixed.

Essay #1: The "I Am Writing This Essay as We Speak" Meta-Narrative

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine. I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

In my junior year, I always had in mind an image of myself finishing the college essay months before the deadline. But as the weeks dragged on and the deadline drew near, it soon became clear that at the rate things are going I would probably have to make new plans for my October, November and December.

Falling into my personal wormhole, I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!" I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

I fell into a state of panic. My college essay. My image of myself in senior year. Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there. My heart lifted, I took his advice and listed three of my greatest achievements - mastering my backgammon strategy, being a part of TREE in my sophomore year, and performing "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" from The Pirates of Penzance in public. And sure enough, I felt inspiration hit me and began to type away furiously into the keyboard about my experience in TREE, or Trees Require Engaged Environmentalists. I reflected on the current state of deforestation, and described the dichotomy of it being both understandable why farmers cut down forests for farmland, and how dangerous this is to our planet. Finally, I added my personal epiphany to the end of my college essay as the cherry on the vanilla sundae, as the overused saying goes.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal. Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In the middle of a hike through Philadelphia's Fairmount Park, I realized that the college essay was nothing more than an embodiment of my character. The two essays I have written were not right because they have failed to become more than just words on recycled paper. The subject failed to come alive. Certainly my keen interest in Star Trek and my enthusiasm for TREE are a great part of who I am, but there were other qualities essential in my character that did not come across in the essays.

With this realization, I turned around as quickly as I could without crashing into a tree.

What Essay #1 Does Well

Here are all things that are working on all cylinders for this personal statement as is.

Killer First Sentence

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine.

• A strange fact. There are different kinds of tornadoes? What is a "landspout tornado" anyway?
• A late-night-deep-thoughts hypothetical. What would it be like to be a kid whose house was destroyed in this unusual way?
• Direct engagement with the reader. Instead of asking "what would it be like to have a tornado destroy a house" it asks "was your house ever destroyed."

Gentle, Self-Deprecating Humor That Lands Well

I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

The author has his cake and eats it too here: both making fun of himself for being super into the Star Trek mythos, but also showing himself being committed enough to try whispering a command to the Enterprise computer alone in his room. You know, just in case.

A Solid Point That Is Made Paragraph by Paragraph

The meat of the essay is that the two versions of himself that the author thought about portraying each fails in some way to describe the real him. Neither an essay focusing on his off-beat interests, nor an essay devoted to his serious activism could capture everything about a well-rounded person in 600 words.

(Image: fir0002 via Wikimedia Commons .)

Where Essay #1 Needs Revision

Rewriting these flawed parts will make the essay shine.

Spending Way Too Long on the Metanarrative

I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal.

Look at how long and draggy these paragraphs are, especially after that zippy opening. Is it at all interesting to read about how someone else found the process of writing hard? Not really, because this is a very common experience.

In the rewrite, I'd advise condensing all of this to maybe a sentence to get to the meat of the actual essay .

Letting Other People Do All the Doing

I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!"

Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there.

Twice in the essay, the author lets someone else tell him what to do. Not only that, but it sounds like both of the "incomplete" essays were dictated by the thoughts of other people and had little to do with his own ideas, experiences, or initiative.

In the rewrite, it would be better to recast both the Star Trek and the TREE versions of the essay as the author's own thoughts rather than someone else's suggestions . This way, the point of the essay—taking apart the idea that a college essay could summarize life experience—is earned by the author's two failed attempts to write that other kind of essay.

Leaving the Insight and Meaning Out of His Experiences

Both the Star Trek fandom and the TREE activism were obviously important life experiences for this author—important enough to be potential college essay topic candidates. But there is no description of what the author did with either one, nor any explanation of why these were so meaningful to his life.

It's fine to say that none of your achievements individually define you, but in order for that to work, you have to really sell the achievements themselves.

In the rewrite, it would be good to explore what he learned about himself and the world by pursuing these interests . How did they change him or seen him into the person he is today?

Not Adding New Shades and Facets of Himself Into the Mix

So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In both of these passages, there is the perfect opportunity to point out what exactly these failed versions of the essay didn't capture about the author . In the next essay draft, I would suggest subtly making a point about his other qualities.

For example, after the Star Trek paragraph, he could talk about other culture he likes to consume, especially if he can discuss art forms he is interested in that would not be expected from someone who loves Star Trek .

Or, after the TREE paragraph, the author could explain why this second essay was no better at capturing him than the first. What was missing? Why is the self in the essay shouting—is it because this version paints him as an overly aggressive activist?

Essay #2: The "I Once Saw Poor People" Service Trip Essay

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive. My whole outlook on life changed after I realized that my life was just being handed to me on a silver spoon, and yet there were those in the world who didn't have enough food to eat or place to live. I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness. But my most vivid memory was the moment I first got to the farming town. The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water? As these questions rolled around my already dazed mind, I heard a soft voice asking me in Spanish, "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" I looked down to see a small boy, around nine years of age, who looked starved, and cold, wearing tattered clothing, comforting me. These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate ahead of themselves. It was at that moment that I saw how selfish I had been. How many people suffered like this in the world, while I went about life concerned about nothing at all?

Thinking back on the trip, maybe I made a difference, maybe not. But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

What Essay #2 Does Well

Let's first point out what this draft has going for it.

Clear Chronology

This is an essay that tries to explain a shift in perspective. There are different ways to structure this overarching idea, but a chronological approach that starts with an earlier opinion, describes a mind changing event, and ends with the transformed point of view is an easy and clear way to lay this potentially complex subject out.

(Image: User:Lite via Wikimedia Commons)

Where Essay #2 Needs Revision

Now let's see what needs to be changed in order for this essay to pass muster.

Condescending, Obnoxious Tone

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive.

This is a very broad generalization, which doesn't tend to be the best way to formulate an argument—or to start an essay. It just makes this author sound dismissive of a huge swath of the population.

In the rewrite, this author would be way better off just concentrate on what she want to say about herself, not pass judgment on "other teenagers," most of whom she doesn't know and will never meet.

I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

Coming from someone who hasn't earned her place in the world through anything but the luck of being born, the word "compassion" sounds really condescending. Calling others "less fortunate" when you're a senior in high school has a dehumanizing quality to it.

These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate in front of themselves.

Again, this comes across as very patronizing. Not only that, but to this little boy the author was clearly not looking all that "fortunate"—instead, she looked pathetic enough to need comforting.

In the next draft, a better hook could be making the essay about the many different kinds of shifting perspectives the author encountered on that trip . A more meaningful essay would compare and contrast the points of view of the TV commercials, to what the group leader said, to the author's own expectations, and finally to this child's point of view.

Vague, Unobservant Description

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness.

Phrases like "cries of the small children from not having enough to eat" and "dirt stained rags" seem like descriptions, but they're really closer to incurious and completely hackneyed generalizations. Why were the kids were crying? How many kids? All the kids? One specific really loud kid?

The same goes for "filthy rags," which is both an incredibly insensitive way to talk about the clothing of these villagers, and again shows a total lack of interest in their life. Why were their clothes dirty? Were they workers or farmers so their clothes showing marks of labor? Did they have Sunday clothes? Traditional clothes they would put on for special occasions? Did they make their own clothes? That would be a good reason to keep wearing clothing even if it had "stains" on it.

The rewrite should either make this section more specific and less reliant on cliches, or should discard it altogether .

The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality.

If this is the "most vivid memory," then I would expect to read all the details that have been seared into the author's brain. What did their leader tell them? What was different in real life? What was the light like? What did the houses/roads/grass/fields/trees/animals/cars look like? What time of day was it? Did they get there by bus, train, or plane? Was there an airport/train station/bus terminal? A city center? Shops? A marketplace?

There are any number of details to include here when doing another drafting pass.

Lack of Insight or Maturity

But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water?

Without a framing device explaining that this initial panic was an overreaction, this section just makes the author sound whiny, entitled, melodramatic, and immature . After all, this isn't a a solo wilderness trek—the author is there with a paid guided program. Just how much mortality is typically associated with these very standard college-application-boosting service trips?

In a rewrite, I would suggest including more perspective on the author's outsized and overprivileged response here. This would fit well with a new focus on the different points of view on this village the author encountered.

Unearned, Clichéd "Deep Thoughts"

But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

Is it really believable that this is what the author learned? There is maybe some evidence to suggest that the author was shaken somewhat out of a comfortable, materialistic existence. But what does "there is more to life than just being alive" even really mean? This conclusion is rather vague, and seems mostly a non sequitur.

In a rewrite, the essay should be completely reoriented to discuss how differently others see us than we see ourselves, pivoting on the experience of being pitied by someone who you thought was pitiable. Then, the new version can end by on a note of being better able to understand different points of view and other people's perspectives .

The Bottom Line

• Bad college essays have problems either with their topics or their execution.
• The essay is how admissions officers learn about your personality, point of view, and maturity level, so getting the topic right is a key factor in letting them see you as an aware, self-directed, open-minded applicant who is going to thrive in an environment of independence.
• The essay is also how admissions officers learn that you are writing at a ready-for-college level, so screwing up the execution shows that you either don't know how to write, or don't care enough to do it well.
• The main ways college essay topics go wrong is bad taste, bad judgment, and lack of self-awareness.
• The main ways college essays fail in their execution have to do with ignoring format, syntax, and genre expectations.

What's Next?

Want to read some excellent college essays now that you've seen some examples of flawed one? Take a look through our roundup of college essay examples published by colleges and then get help with brainstorming your perfect college essay topic .

Need some guidance on other parts of the application process? Check out our detailed, step-by-step guide to college applications for advice.

Are you considering taking the SAT or ACT again before you submit your application? Read about our famous test prep guides for hints and strategies for a better score.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Why Do I Hate School? Exploring the Reasons and Finding Solutions

Education is a fundamental aspect of our lives, shaping and molding us into well-rounded individuals ready to conquer the world. However, despite this ideal, many students find themselves in a state of despising, loathing, or even hating school. In this article, we will delve into the reasons behind why some students hate school, strategies to overcome this feeling, and whether it is normal to dislike school.

Why Do Some Students Hate School?

It is important to acknowledge that hating school is not a universal sentiment. Many students thrive in an educational environment, cherishing the learning opportunities and positive experiences they gain. However, for others, school becomes a source of frustration, leading to a strong dislike. Here are some key reasons why:

1. Lack of Relevance:

One of the most common reasons for hating school is the perceived lack of relevance in the curriculum. Many students fail to see how the subjects being taught connect to their real-world experiences. For instance, a student interested in technology may detest a history class that seems far removed from their passion.

“I just don’t understand why we have to learn this stuff. I’ll never use it in real life!” complains David, an 8th grader who has a strong interest in computer programming.

2. Monotonous Teaching Methods:

The traditional teaching methods employed by schools often contribute to the dislike some students develop towards the educational system. Rote memorization, lengthy lectures, and standardized testing can create a stagnant and uninspiring learning environment.

“I feel like I’m just memorizing facts for exams and forgetting everything the next day. It’s monotonous and dull,” laments Sarah, a high school student.

3. Social Pressure and Bullying:

For some students, the classroom becomes a place of stress, anxiety, and even bullying. Negative social environments can lead to feelings of hatred towards school, which then extends beyond academics.

“I hate going to school because there are mean kids who make fun of me. They make me feel worthless,” shares Emma, a 10-year-old student.

4. Lack of Support and Understanding:

When students face challenges or difficulties in their educational journey, they require support and understanding from their teachers and parents. However, the lack of empathy or inadequate assistance from educators can contribute to a strong dislike for school.

“I try my best, but when I don’t understand something and ask for help, my teacher just brushes me off and tells me to figure it out myself. It makes me hate coming to school,” expresses Alex, a middle school student.

5. Overemphasis on Grades:

In many educational systems, the focus on grades and performance can become overwhelming. Students are often pressured to achieve high scores, leading to stress, anxiety, and ultimately a negative perception of school.

“I hate how everything is about the grades. It feels like my worth as a person is determined solely by my marks,” confides Jasmine, a college student.

6. Lack of Autonomy and Creativity:

Some students rebel against the rigid structure of traditional schooling, which limits their autonomy and creativity. These students may feel that their individuality is stifled, leading to a profound disdain for the educational system.

“I have so many great ideas, but the teachers never give us a chance to express ourselves. It’s frustrating and makes me hate school,” complains Michael, a high school student.

How Can I Overcome My Hatred for School?

If you find yourself despising school, it is important to remember that you are not alone. Many have felt the same way and successfully overcome these negative emotions. Here are some strategies to help you navigate through your dislike for school:

1. Find Your Passion:

Explore your interests outside of the traditional curriculum. Seek out extracurricular activities or hobbies that align with your passion. By doing so, you create a positive association with learning, making school a means to pursue your interests rather than a burden.

“I discovered a photography club in my school, which opened up a world of creativity for me. Now, I view school as an opportunity to enhance my photography skills,” shares Lily, a high school student.

2. Seek Support:

Talk to someone you trust, be it a teacher, parent, or counselor, about your feelings towards school. They can provide guidance, understanding, and potentially advocate for changes within the educational system.

“After confiding in my teacher about my struggles, she offered additional support and alternative study methods. It made a tremendous difference,” expresses Mark, a college student.

3. Challenge Yourself:

Seek out advanced or specialized classes that align with your interests. By engaging in subjects that excite you, you’re more likely to develop a positive outlook on your educational experience.

“I started taking advanced math courses, which were challenging but fascinating. It completely changed my perspective on school,” says Emily, a middle school student.

4. Build Positive Relationships:

Form friendships with classmates who share similar interests or positive attitudes towards education. Surrounding yourself with supportive peers can create a more enjoyable and motivating school environment.

“I found a group of friends who shared my love for science. We started studying together, sharing resources, and cheering each other on. Suddenly, school became fun,” explains Liam, a high school student.

5. Develop Autonomy:

Take control of your own learning by seeking opportunities outside the classroom. Explore online resources, join clubs, or attend workshops that align with your interests. Empowering yourself as a self-directed learner can significantly impact your mindset towards school.

“I started participating in online coding courses that allowed me to learn at my own pace. It made me realize that not all learning had to happen within the confines of a classroom,” shares Ryan, a college student.

Is It Normal to Dislike School?

Yes, it is normal to dislike school. Every individual has unique experiences and preferences, including their educational journey. Some students thrive in the traditional school setting, while others find alternative paths or educational methods more suitable for their learning style and interests.

It is essential to recognize that hating or disliking school does not necessarily indicate a lack of intelligence or potential. It is merely a reflection of personal adaptability and compatibility with the existing educational system.

“The focus shouldn’t be on forcing students to like school but rather on creating an educational environment that inspires and motivates them,” suggests Dr. Jennifer Adams, education psychologist.

“We need to create an inclusive educational system that caters to the diverse needs and interests of students, offering multiple pathways to success,” adds Dr. James Johnson, expert in education policy.

By acknowledging and respecting each student’s unique experience, educational institutions can work towards minimizing the number of individuals who hate school and create a more positive, engaging, and effective learning environment.

References:

• Adams, J. “Creating an Engaging Educational Environment,” Journal of Modern Education, vol. 25, no. 3, 2019, pp. 45-62.
• Johnson, J. “Education Policy for the 21st Century,” Journal of Educational Reform, vol. 18, no. 2, 2018, pp. 76-92.

Christophe Garon

July 18, 2023

Mind , Psychology

education , school , student

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Tips To Help Teenagers Who Don't Like School

Middle and high school can represent a difficult time in a person’s life, which can lead many kids to say “I hate school!”. 

This phase comes with changes in lots of different areas, and the pressure to fit in and achieve the success that many teenagers experience can make it even harder. There are a variety of reasons you may not like school, whether they’re social, academic, or otherwise, but there are almost always steps you can take to make your environment more manageable.

5 reasons you might not like school, plus five solutions to try

Depending on your age, you may still have several years of middle school or high school ahead of you. If you’re unhappy with a particular aspect, some of the following tips might be useful. Let’s take a look at common reasons teenagers don’t like school along with a strategy that may help improve each one.

1. You’re feeling overwhelmed

If school feels overwhelming, you’re not alone. Many teenagers find themselves with packed schedules. From classes and homework to extracurricular activities and even part-time jobs, many students want to escape back to summer. Add time for relaxation and hanging out with friends, and you might be fully booked. If what you have on your plate is truly too much, you might speak with your parents, a guidance counselor, or a therapist about what you may be able to reasonably cut from your agenda. 

It may also help to try out some new organizational tactics. Keeping a physical planner can be helpful, since you can see your weeks and months at a glance so you can plan ahead. There are plenty of planning apps for your phone that are available, too. You might also try color-coding your materials for different classes, setting phone reminders for important dates and assignments, focusing on one thing at a time instead of multitasking, getting into a reliable routine, and getting enough sleep. These are all strategies that might help you keep things organized and running smoothly.

2. You hate getting up early

In general, teenagers need more sleep than the average adult because their bodies and brains are still growing. If you’re having trouble waking up during the semester anymore, it’s not your brother or sister’s fault--you may not be getting enough rest each night. Aiming for at least eight or nine hours is typically recommended. If you have trouble getting good sleep, you can try a few different strategies for establishing better sleep habits. Examples include going to bed and waking up at the same time every day and sleeping in a dark, quiet room that’s at a good temperature. It may also help to limit your screen time, especially before bed. Research suggests that more smartphone use correlates with poorer sleep outcomes in teenagers especially, so putting your phone down at least an hour or two before bed may be beneficial.

3. You have test anxiety

Test-taking can be a significant source of stress and anxiety for people at various types of schools, whether you find the source material interesting or not. Depending on your school district, most exams test knowledge in one, specific way, which can mean that people with different learning styles may need to improve regardless of their grasp of the subjects. There can also be a lot of pressure from teachers or parents associated with getting good grades. If test anxiety is making it hard for you to like school, there are a few things you can try. First, learning some deep breathing exercises may help you keep yourself calm and focused when going into an exam. Next, you could meet with a tutor who can evaluate your studying and test-taking habits and help you find ways to remember what was discussed in your lectures. Finally, you can ask your teachers for accommodations if you have specific needs around test-taking. They may be able to grant you extra time or let you take the test in a quieter setting.

4. You’re being bullied

According to the CDC, about one in five high school students report being bullied at public school in the past year, and about one in six reports being bullied online. Bullying is serious, and it can cause long-term fear and have a negative impact on you in both the short and the long term. That’s why seeking help is so important. According to stopbullying.gov , telling the bully to stop in a calm, clear voice can be effective in some cases. If you’re at risk for physical harm, however, walking away and finding an adult who can help is best. You may also want to speak with a teacher or counselor you can trust to help prevent future instances of bullying.

If you or a loved one is experiencing abuse, contact the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). Support is available 24/7.

If you are experiencing trauma, support is available. Please see our Get Help Now page for more resources.

5. You’re experiencing anxiety or depression

If you’re facing certain mental health challenges, it can be difficult to enjoy, do well in, or even go to school. At this age, anxiety can manifest as concerns about all kinds of things, from your academic performance, social life, and appearance to your future plans or family situation at home, to name a few. This combined with a poor diet full of junk food can point to symptoms such as trouble concentrating, irritability, sleep problems, recurring fears and worries, and extreme self-consciousness. When it comes to depression, symptoms in children and teenagers can include crying spells, feelings of hopelessness, loss of interest in activities once enjoyed, feeling easily frustrated, and low self-esteem. If you feel you may have a mental illness like anxiety or depression, there is help available. Doctors, a school counselor, or a licensed therapist can help you manage symptoms so that you can feel and function better at school and in other parts of your life.

No matter what grade you are in, facing all the challenges that middle and high school may offer can be difficult. However, you don’t have to do it alone. A therapist can listen, help to explain what is happening and provide you with a safe, nonjudgmental space where you can talk about what’s bothering you at school.

They can help provide you with a lesson for building self-confidence, decreasing anxiety, developing a sense of self, keeping yourself organized, and enjoying your budding sense of freedom. Talking about these topics with a professional can provide support and guidance for whatever you’re going through, and they may also identify and offer treatment for any mental health disorders you might be experiencing.

You can speak with a mental health professional in person or online. Research suggests that online and in-person therapy offer similar benefits, so you can choose the method that works better for you. If you’re interested in the online format, a virtual therapy platform may be worth considering. BetterHelp is one option for online therapy for those 18 and older. It will match you with a licensed therapist who you can speak with via phone, video call, and/or online chat from your house. TeenCounseling offers the same services but to those between the ages of 13 and 19, with parental consent. 

Regardless of your age or the therapy format you feel most comfortable with, know that there is support available to you as you face whatever challenges you may have in front of you at school.

What do I do if I hate my school?

If you hate going to school, one of the first things to do is figure out why so you can talk to someone about it. Sit down and create a written list of the things you don’t like - and anything that you do - about going to school; it's important you can explain where your feelings come from as best as you can. Once you have a good understanding (or at least a start), consider talking to your parents about what is bothering you. Tell them why you hate school, what is being done to make you upset, and what you have already tried doing to correct it. 

If your parents are unable or unwilling to hear your concerns, you should consider talking to another safe adult in your life. Teachers and school counselors are likely good choices. If you’re feeling a lot of anxiety about going to school , a counselor can help figure out how to best help you feel better at school and prevent difficult feelings from arising again. The most important thing to do is likely to reach out before feelings become overwhelming. School isn’t always fun, but you deserve to feel safe, and supported there. 

Is it normal not to like school?

It is normal not to like school, especially in later grades. High school can be a highly stressful experience for any teenager, despite opportunities for socialization, sports, and fun extracurriculars. All of those may appear as strong benefits to adults, but the Yale Child Study Center found in a survey of high school students that nearly 75% of their feelings regarding school were negative, indicating that students carry a lot of dislike for their school experience. However, if a student wants to cry at the thought of going to school, struggles to wake up consistently, describes feeling hated, or can’t report any positive aspects of their education, it’s likely a more serious issue is underlying their dislike of school. 

Is it normal for a 13-year-old to hate school?

It is normal for middle and high school students to dislike school sometimes, but a sustained hatred for school is likely rarer. A significant hatred of school may lead to school avoidance, wherein a student puts in considerable effort to avoid attending school at all. School avoidance, also called school refusal, is sometimes a sign of a deeper mental health concern. 

Anxiety disorders can sometimes be the root cause, or a student may be experiencing a form of trauma related to a fear of attacks or imminent harm , along with other traumatic things that may happen. While it is certainly normal for a 13-year-old to dislike attending school occasionally or even frequently, a persistent hatred of school or school avoidance behaviors likely indicate that a deeper issue is contributing. 

Is there a school phobia?

Until the mid-20th century, truancy (an unexcused absence from school) was treated universally as a matter of delinquency, meaning that students did not attend because they simply did not care about their education and preferred to engage in delinquent behavior. Around the early 1940s, researchers noted that many students avoided school due to factors defined by fear and distress, not delinquency. The term “school phobia” was coined during that time period to describe students who avoided school because of anxiety or fear. 

The term “social phobia” has mostly been replaced by “school refusal,” which refers to school-avoiding behaviors , regardless of their cause. School refusal might occur because of a fear of failing a subject like math or reading, anxiety about socializing, avoiding exercise, bullying, or other reasons. The way school refusal is addressed varies considerably from case to case, often depending on how much school impacts the individual student. In situations where anxiety or fear are significant contributors, the student is likely experiencing what the original inventors of the term “school phobia” described. 

Is school making kids depressed?

Schools can contribute to difficult feelings, and some school-based factors can increase the chances a student will be diagnosed with a mental health concern. For example, one study found that bullying or teasing at school can significantly increase the risk of depression, as can struggling in a certain subject or working to overcome a learning disability. 

The stressful nature of school, a place where children and teenagers are expected to learn adult skills and begin to behave as adults, can also significantly impact a student’s mental health. However, resources like school counselors and mental health support groups are available to help struggling students. While school can contribute to depression, it is likely that those who are depressed at school also have other factors contributing to their mental state. 

Do kids with Attention Deficient Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) hate school?

Although evidence suggests that students with ADHD tend to struggle more in school than their peers , an ADHD diagnosis is not a guarantee that a student will hate school. Students will probably be more likely to dislike school if their ADHD is poorly managed or if their school is unaware of their diagnosis. They might find it challenging to hear and understand lengthy instructions, avoid staying in their seat, or fail to retain information from courses that do not interest them. Struggling to sit still or pay attention in every class (except maybe lunch) can create a significant mental load for students with poorly managed ADHD. 

In contrast, students with well-managed ADHD whose caregivers have coordinated with the school likely find school significantly more preferable and less stressful. Elementary students usually need to rely on their parents to advocate for them, but older students should consider approaching a trusted teacher or school official in addition to their parents if ADHD is adversely impacting their education. 

Is school too stressful for kids?

There is ongoing concern regarding the level of stress experienced by students in school, especially in later grades. Evidence suggests that high schoolers and college students are especially prone to stress-related effects due to the sudden increase (at most school districts in the United States) in responsibility and autonomy between grades eight and nine. Academic-related stress has been shown to increase the risk of substance use, dropout, sleep disturbances, and reduced academic achievement. 

Do kids feel lonely at school?

Children and teens often feel lonely at school for several reasons. Students, especially younger ones, may not know how to socialize and interact with their peers. They might also feel anxiety about interacting with peers, or they may be experiencing depression, which commonly causes children and teens to withdraw from others . They may also feel as though they don’t fit in with others, perhaps because they are slower to mature. Parents and schools can help kids feel less lonely by encouraging them to interact with others, practicing social skills, offering clarification regarding social situations, and helping the child find friendships outside of school. 

Can too much homework cause depression?

Evidence suggests that excessive homework can have several adverse effects , notably increased stress levels, health declines, and a loss of opportunities to engage in other extracurricular activities. Students often struggle to see the point of homework or resent that it has been assigned, which may further reduce the benefit of taking work home from school. 

The health reductions associated with excessive homework, such as sleep deprivation and weight loss, are also associated with high stress and depression. Sleep disturbances alone can make it difficult for a student to get up in the morning to attend school, and that may be worsened by late nights completing homework. While homework itself probably isn’t the sole cause of a student’s depression, the stress it causes may be a significant contributing factor. 

• Headache In The Back Of The Head: Where It Comes From And How To Relieve It Medically reviewed by April Justice , LICSW
• Improving Your Self-Confidence And Outlook As A Teen Medically reviewed by Elizabeth Erban , LMFT, IMH-E
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The New School 2023-24 Supplemental Essay Prompt Guide

Regular Decision Deadline: Jan 15

You Have: 

The New School 2023-24 Application Essay Question Explanations 

The Requirements: 2 essays of 400 words each

Supplemental Essay Type(s): Why , Community

The New School asks applicants to respond to two essay prompts in 400 words or fewer. It’s very possible that if you’re applying to a specific major, you may have to write a third essay! We recommend starting your application in the Common App to see what’s in store. In the meantime, let’s dive into the two essays all students have to write!

In your study or work at The New School, what social issue or system would you make the focus of your efforts to effect change? (400 words)

The New School wants to welcome students to campus who not only want to make their mark, but also feel passionate about making the world a better place. The issue you choose to discuss can really run the gamut. Which social issues are close to your heart and why? Maybe you would love to address reproductive rights and expand healthcare access for people in historically underserved communities. Perhaps you’d like to address systemic racism and discrimination within your area of study. Remember to connect the social issue you’re passionate about to your vision of life at The New School. You should be able to point to specific examples of their offerings that will help you to effect change, whether they be classes, networking opportunities, research, etc.

What specific aspects of The New School’s academic programs or community drew you to apply? Please pay particular attention within your essay to the college, program, and/or campus to which you have applied. ( 400 words)

This is a pretty standard “why” essay that allows students to choose their line of focus: academics or community. Admissions wants to know what has inspired you to apply, so save their time (and yours) by cutting to the chase. Of course, brevity isn’t the same as generality, so make your point with specifics. As with any other “why” essay, take some time to do your research. Scour your program’s website for information about classes, professors, unique opportunities, and notable alumni. What catches your eye? What inspires you? How does it connect to an interest you have? How does The New School’s unique curriculum satisfy your needs in a way no other school could? If the community drew you in, why is that? Have you heard wonderful things from your older brother who attends? Do you dream of studying in New York City? (If so, why is The New School the NYC institution for you, out of all the myriad options in the area?) This is your opportunity to impress admissions with your knowledge of what The New School has to offer, your vision for your future, and why those two things are aligned.

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What do kids like and dislike about school? This is why it matters – and we can do something about it

Professor and Director of the Centre for Inclusive Education, Queensland University of Technology

Postdoctoral Research Fellow, Centre for Inclusive Education, Queensland University of Technology

Associate Professor in Education, Wellbeing and Children's Rights, Queensland University of Technology

Professor in Educational Psychology, University of Wollongong

Disclosure statement

Linda J. Graham receives funding from the Australian Research Council (ARC), the Queensland Government and the Spencer Foundation.

Jenna Gillett-Swan receives funding from the Australian Research Council (ARC) and the Queensland Government.

Callula Killingly and Penny Van Bergen do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

Queensland University of Technology and University of Wollongong provide funding as members of The Conversation AU.

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“School SUX !”

We’ve all heard it and some of us have felt it. It’s such a common sentiment that parents and teachers might be tempted to dismiss it. After all, school is good for you! Like vegetables. It is something you have to have, whether you like it or not.

But does the intrinsic “good” and compulsory nature of school education mean we should ignore students who say they don’t like it? Or that we shouldn’t try to make it more palatable?

Feeling positive about school is associated with higher attendance , better classroom adjustment and engagement , and higher academic achievement .

Students don’t have to love school to experience these benefits. Even those who like school will dislike aspects of it: subjects they aren’t good at, having to get up early, lack of tuckshop options, and so on.

But, for some students, dislike for school can become pervasive – they dislike almost everything about it.

Some of these students may drop out of school, which has serious implications for their future job prospects, financial security and quality of life. So, yes, it matters a great deal if students don’t like school and it’s important to know why , so we can do something about it.

How did we research dislike for school?

Our recent study investigated associations between school liking and factors that previous research suggests make students more likely to stay in school or leave: teacher support , connectedness to school , and the use of detentions, suspensions and expulsions.

Our aim was to learn how we might be able to improve schooling from the perspective of students who like it the least. We surveyed 1,002 students in grades 7-10 from three complex secondary schools. These are the grades and types of schools with the highest suspension and lowest retention rates.

We wanted to find out how these students feel about school and teachers, as well as their experiences of exclusionary discipline, and whether there were important differences between those who said they did and did not like school.

What did we find?

The good news is that two-thirds of our study sample said they like school. Almost half of these students said they had always liked it. One of them said:

“Love it. I’d prefer to live at school. Like, if Hogwarts was an actual place, I’d go there.”

Worryingly, one-third of students said they do not like school. Although school liking was highest in grade 7, most students indicated their dislike began in the transition to high school.

“Yeah, it was probably as soon as I hit high school. Year 7 things got a lot harder.”

This dislike appears to increase over time, with grade 9 having the highest proportion of dislikers. These patterns correspond with suspension rates, which double in grade 7 and peak in grade 9 .

What do students like and dislike most?

Our suspicion that students in these two groups like and dislike different things about school proved correct. While “friends” was the most-liked aspect of school for both groups, a much higher proportion of school likers than dislikers chose “learning”.

“I feel like every day I go to school, I just flex my knowledge. I like to learn. Learning’s alright.”

By contrast, a much higher proportion of dislikers chose “breaktime” as their most-liked aspect. The attraction became clearer through interviews:

“What do you like most about school?” […] “Break. So I get to see my friends.”

A similar pattern emerged for the least-liked aspects of school. A much higher proportion of dislikers than likers selected schoolwork, teachers and discipline policy as the aspects they disliked most.

“Pretty much work, because they give you all the assessments and expect it to be done so quick […]”

These findings are fairly intuitive and resonate with previous research with students with a history of disruptive behaviour who also nominated schoolwork and teachers.

The previous study found an interesting connection between the two. Students who find learning difficult will often clash with teachers whose job it is to make them do their work. Some teachers are kinder and more supportive in how they do that than others.

High school is especially difficult for these students because they have to navigate more teachers and are not good at “code-switching” to meet diverse rules and expectations.

“It was hard because you go from having a teacher the whole term who would let you do stuff and then if you tried to do that in another class, it would just be like no, you can’t do that. Yeah, and they just yell at you.”

Students who clash with teachers also tend also to experience exclusionary discipline. In our sample, not liking school was significantly associated with having received a detention, suspension or expulsion in the past 12 months. Forty-one percent of dislikers reported having been suspended (versus 14% of likers).

Our analyses also found large differences in students’ ratings of teacher support. Dislikers provided lower ratings on every item.

The highest-rated item for both groups was: “My teacher always wants me to do my best.” The lowest was: “My teacher has time for me.” The largest difference between groups was for “My teacher listens to me.”

What can schools do?

Relationships between teachers and students can be improved and educators do not have to wait for governments to act. A simple start would be for school leaders to implement student-driven school change to address issues from the perspective of all students, but especially those who say they least want to be there.

As for government policy, the findings from our study highlight one possibility for consideration. When Queensland shifted grade 7 from the primary phase to the secondary phase in 2015, steps were takens to better support children in their first year of high school. Support included a core teacher model, when one teacher takes the same students for English and humanities or maths and science, reducing the number of teachers that students have to navigate, and dedicated play areas for grade 7 students to help reduce anxiety.

The findings from our study of three Queensland secondary schools suggest that initiative may have had some success for up two-thirds of grade 7 students at least. Yet, if school liking declines in grades 8 and beyond, mirroring the rise in suspensions, is it not time to consider whether grade 8s and 9s may benefit from more intensive pastoral care?

We could always ask them!

• School policy
• School discipline
• School refusal
• School dropout
• School suspension
• School attendance
• pastoral care
• School engagement

Program Manager, Teaching & Learning Initiatives

Lecturer/Senior Lecturer, Earth System Science (School of Science)

Sydney Horizon Educators (Identified)

Deputy Social Media Producer

Associate Professor, Occupational Therapy

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Hate Writing? How to Make It Through Senior Year

Essays. Exams. Standardized tests. As a senior in high school, you’re going to be doing a lot of writing. If it feels like a slog now, we have some good news and bad news. The bad news is that writing is going to follow you through the rest of your life—not only in college, but also in most professions, including some unexpected ones, like medicine or engineering! The good news is that you can, with some effort, learn to enjoy writing. Read on to find out about opportunities to hone your writing, so you can condition yourself to make it a painless and even enjoyable part of your routine—and your life.

Why Writing Matters Now

College essays.

If you dislike writing papers, you may be dreading your college essays. Fortunately, your essays can—and should—be more creative than the school papers and tests. You can also choose your own topic, so you’ll be able to write about something that’s meaningful to you.

Your ability to write and communicate effectively is key here, because you need to present who you are as a person and what interests you in a short essay. For more advice on how to wow colleges with your personal statement, check out essay posts on CollegeVine’s blog.

With the exception of some math and art courses, such as Calculus and Studio Art, most AP exams have short answer or essay sections. While these sections mainly test your knowledge of the subject matter, graders will also assess the language you use to articulate your response. You can look up individual courses and exams to see how your writing will be graded on the College Board website .

If you’re thinking of putting off honing your writing skills until college, think again. At some colleges, doing well on certain AP tests will allow you to fulfill introductory writing course requirements and may even earn you college credit, so it’s worth putting in the effort now.

Standardized Tests

Writing sections on the SAT and ACT are optional, but many colleges still require them for admission. Check out our guides to the SAT Essay and ACT Writing sections to learn what these essays entail and view tips on how to earn high scores.

High School

“I’ve had to write tons of papers throughout high school,” you may be thinking. “Why is now any different?”

As you get older, people expect more from you. That includes your teachers. Now that you’ve completed most of your high school career, your teachers are going to expect your writing to be more sophisticated. They also want to help prepare you for next year, when your professors will expect you to have mastered certain competencies before you even set foot in their classrooms…

Why Writing Will Matter Later

…which leads us into our next point: In college, you’re going to have to write. A lot. Most majors require extensive writing in the form of term papers, essays, exams, and other projects. Even many technical science and math majors require research papers, lab writeups, and reports.

Writing is also integral to many careers, even ones with which you may not associate it. For instance, as a psychologist, you will be writing reports. If you become a publicist, you will write press releases. Almost every job requires competent communications skills, whether they show up in the form of emails, presentations, or something else entirely. So start working on those skills now!

Your GPA and SAT don’t tell the full admissions story

Our chancing engine factors in extracurricular activities, demographics, and other holistic details. We’ll let you know what your chances are at your dream schools — and how to improve your chances!

Our chancing engine factors in extracurricular activities, demographic, and other holistic details.

Our chancing engine factors in extracurricular activities, demographic, and other holistic details. We’ll let you know what your chances are at your dream schools — and how to improve your chances!

Tips for Improving Your Writing and Learning to Love It

Of course, you aren’t going to become a master writer overnight. It’s going to take some work. Here are some tips to help get you there:

• Try to write a little bit every day. If you set a timer and tell yourself, “I’m going to write for 30 minutes,” it will be more manageable and become part of your routine.
• Write in a journal, even if you’re just jotting down random thoughts. That way, writing becomes a confidant and companion.
• Write about topics that are interesting to you. While you can’t necessarily choose every topic for your essays, especially when you have course requirements and exams, if you write about topics that are meaningful to you, you’re more likely to enjoy the process. Set aside some time to writing about things that matter to you, so writing becomes less of a chore.
• To complement the above point, start a blog about a topic that interests you, so that you are engaging with the activity. Love to travel? Share your latest adventures with readers. Doing some volunteer work? Write about your experiences tutoring at an after-school center or working with animals at the local shelter.
• You should write about topics that are important to you in your college essays. When you care about the topic, that passion often shows through, and your audience is more likely to take pleasure in reading it.
• Ask for feedback . While it’s always hard to hear criticism of your work, you need to know what other people think so you can improve. Make sure you ask for both critiques and compliments; not only will this be better for your self esteem, but you’ll also know what you’re doing right .
• Read! Whether you read a book a week or skim the news on occasion, everyone reads to some extent. And every great writer started as a reader. We’re not telling you to steal other writers’ ideas, but reading can be a great source of inspiration.
• For more ideas on improving your writing, check out How to Sharpen Your Writing Skills.

If you start working on your writing now, it will become more tolerable later. Who knows? Maybe you’ll even enjoy it.

Want help with your college essays to improve your admissions chances? Sign up for your free CollegeVine account and get access to our essay guides and courses. You can also get your essay peer-reviewed and improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays.

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New School’s 2023-24 Essay Prompts

Community service short response.

In your study or work at The New School, what social issue or system would you make the focus of your efforts to effect change?

Why This College Short Response

What specific aspects of The New School‘s academic programs or community drew you to apply? Please pay particular attention within your essay to the college, program, and/or campus to which you have applied.

Common App Personal Essay

The essay demonstrates your ability to write clearly and concisely on a selected topic and helps you distinguish yourself in your own voice. What do you want the readers of your application to know about you apart from courses, grades, and test scores? Choose the option that best helps you answer that question and write an essay of no more than 650 words, using the prompt to inspire and structure your response. Remember: 650 words is your limit, not your goal. Use the full range if you need it, but don‘t feel obligated to do so.

Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?

Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?

Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you‘ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

What will first-time readers think of your college essay?

If Your Teen Hates School, It Could Signal a Larger Problem

Negative, pessimistic teens are often under too much academic pressure.

What to Do If Your Teen Hates School

For multiple reasons, the academic experience of this generation of teens has become increasingly stressful .

Courses are more difficult and time-consuming, competition is greater, and the ever-present fear of not getting into college haunts many kids beginning in middle school. They frequently complain about not having enough time to enjoy extracurricular activities and also get their work done. In addition, social media , video games and other media are such an intense draw for kids that they struggle to prioritize non-screen aspects of life. They often use technology as an escape from academic pressure, creating a vicious cycle of not getting work done, which then results in even more stress as they fall behind.

For a growing segment of teens, these combined challenges can have a significant and long-lasting impact on their emotional health. These are not the kids who are naturally very bright and can succeed at high academic levels while still managing a balanced social and extracurricular life. They are also not the kids who meet diagnostic criteria for a specific psychological diagnosis, such as anxiety or depression , or who necessarily have a learning disorder or otherwise generally have great difficulty understanding subject matter. They are everyone else: kids who need to work very hard if they are to succeed at advanced academic levels.

[Read: How Much Homework Is Too Much for Our Teens? ]

For these students, the pressure takes its toll. They may complain of headaches, stomachaches or difficulty falling asleep, or they might struggle to wake up in a timely fashion on school mornings. Most predominantly, they talk about how much they dislike school, and wish they weren't under so much pressure. They count the days until the weekends, vacations and longer school breaks, like summer. Often, they experience an overflow of negative thoughts and feelings that seeps into other aspects of life, finding reason to complain about almost anything.

Parents experience these teens as constantly pessimistic and find this to be frustrating, which is likely to lead to bickering between parent and child, adding yet another layer of stress. For many kids, it seems like their life is doomed to feel like this forever – an endless pressure cooker of negativity. Parents don’t always see an end in sight either, and wish they had a child who was happier, less negative and more appreciative of all that life offers.

In fact, it is possible to effect change that results in a happier and emotionally healthier child, but this requires both the parent and child to analyze the choices the child is making and those that the parent is making for the child. In some cases, parents are at least partially responsible for their children’s stress and negativity. They have very high academic expectations, perhaps beyond the child’s natural capability. They encourage their child to take classes that are more than the child can handle academically – even with tutors – because they perceive the child needs to take these classes to prepare for college. For many teens, the constant struggle to succeed, paired with the knowledge that their parents aren’t happy with them if they don’t do well, leaves them feeling hopeless and negative.

Of course, it isn't always the parent who applies the pressure. Some kids put this type of academic pressure on themselves because they hope to please their parents, want to compare favorably to peers or are worried about getting into a "good" college. Regardless of whether this is parent- or child-driven, kids who struggle with very challenging academics spend so much effort on schoolwork that it is difficult for them to find the time and energy to enjoy extracurricular and social activities which might actually relieve some of their stress.

[Read: Why We Need Social and Emotional Learning in Schools .]

Some teens do have the cognitive ability to handle rigorous academic challenges if they push themselves hard, but do not have the emotional resilience to do so. Often parents (and kids) don’t realize that both are needed for a child to be successful academically. Being smart isn’t enough (unless a child is extremely bright). One must also be able to study long hours, manage on less sleep, and sacrifice other activities and even downtime for academics. Not surprisingly, many kids cannot and should not do this, but even at such a young age, they already suffer from poor "work-"life balance – or in this case, more precisely, poor school-life balance.

When children or teens struggle in this way – experiencing academics and life as mainly negative and stressful – it's time to take a hard look at what must be changed to alleviate their stress. To start, it's important to keep their life balanced by including enough non-academic experiences. Therefore, unless they are excessively social or participate in a large number of extracurricular activities, these should not be the first things to go.

The first step is to assess whether a change in academics is in order. Before the next school year begins, it is particularly important to assess your child’s schedule to determine if changes need to be made. Ask yourself if your child is in too many advanced classes, or perhaps needs fewer electives to provide a break during the school day. Teens don’t always have good judgment, so they should not be allowed to make these important decisions alone. If you believe that your child would be happier, less stressed and more optimistic with an easier schedule, insist on the change. Even once the school year starts, it is always possible to switch classes for the first few weeks. Actively monitor your teen’s workload and stress level. Make changes if appropriate.

If you are reluctant to make a change that you know would be better for your child’s emotional health, then you will need to wrestle with your own priorities. Keep in mind that even if you are able to push your teen through high school to an acceptance at a college of choice, there is a high likelihood that your child will struggle academically and emotionally in this college, because it is actually not a good match for the child. Ask yourself if it's worth sacrificing your child’s emotional health so that the child can get into a particular college or to keep up with friends. There are a great many colleges at which a child can be successful and happy .

[See: 13 Tips for Getting Kids Health-Ready for Back to School .]

Keep in mind that when a child is chronically stressed, negative and pessimistic about school (and life), this is a barometer of emotional health. You will need to step in and make changes that may conflict with what you wish your child could accomplish, but which the child realistically can’t do. However, keep in mind that an unhappy child is likely to grow into an unhappy adult, while a happy child will become a happy adult who is likely to be confident and successful.

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Why this Harvard-bound Brockton student's college admissions essay went viral on TikTok

BROCKTON — Abigail Mack lost her mother, Julie, to cancer when she was just 12 years old.

The Cardinal Spellman High School valedictorian used that experience to write her college admissions essay, which went viral on TikTok for her heartfelt words. It also got her into her dream school, Harvard University.

Mack, a Bridgewater resident, wrote about the challenges she faced growing up with one parent and living in a world constructed for two-parent families.

"I hate the letter 'S,'" Mack started her essay. "Of the 164,777 words with 'S,' I only grapple with one. To condemn an entire letter because of its use 0.0006 percent of the time sounds statistically absurd, but that one case changed 100 percent of my life.

"I used to have two parents, but now I have one, and the 'S' in parents isn't going anywhere. 'S' follows me. I can't get through a day without being reminded that while my friends went out to dinner with their parents, I ate with my parent. As I write this essay, there is a blue line under the word 'parent,' telling me to check my grammar; even Grammarly assumes that I should have parents, but cancer doesn't listen to edit suggestions."

Mack read the introduction to her Common App essay in a May 3 TikTok video . The initial video has been viewed 17 million times as of Thursday. It has been "liked" 4.7 million times.

"I see why you got in," one TikTok commenter wrote.

"WOW," another user wrote.

Mack went on to share additional parts of her essay in a four-part video series.

The 18-year-old said she tried to abandon "S, " because the world wouldn't. Mack tried to stay busy because "you can't have dinner with your 'parent' (thanks again Grammarly) if you're too busy to have family dinner."

Mack filled all her spare time and said she became known as the "busy kid." She played volleyball, took dance classes, participated in theater and did other after-school activities. Mack said certain themes — academics, theater and politics — kept coming up in her life and she found her rhythm and embraced it .

"I stopped running away from a single 'S' and began chasing a double 'S' — paSSion," Mack wrote. "Passion has given me purpose. I was shackled to 'S' as I tried to escape the confines of the traditional familial structure."

Mack was also accepted into other prestigious colleges, including Dartmouth College, Georgetown University and the University of Notre Dame.

Her viral TikTok video has now gained national attention, with a trending BuzzFeed story about her essay reaching more than 725,000 views as of Thursday morning.

"Despite all obstacles, Abigail has found incredible success at Cardinal Spellman High School and outside of it as well on the stage in Boston Theater and even as part of the re-election campaign for Senator Ed Markey," Cardinal Spellman said in a statement. "She continues to excel in sports and academics here at Spellman, earning the title of Valedictorian for the class of 2021. Her recent success and acceptance into Harvard comes as no surprise to her friends, family and Cardinal Spellman mentors!"

Mack's father, Jonathan, continues to run Julie's Studio of Dance in West Bridgewater, which Julie Mack opened just months before her death at the age of 39 in 2014 . Julie Mack had battled cancer since she was 14 years old.

Mack will enter Harvard in the fall as an undecided major, but she's considering pursuing a focus in foreign policy.

Enterprise senior reporter Cody Shepard can be reached by email at  [email protected] . You can follow him on Twitter at @cshepard_ENT . Support local journalism by purchasing a digital or print subscription to The Enterprise today.

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Learn English

My School Essay in English (100, 200, 300, 500 words)

Table of Contents

My School Essay 100 Words

My school is a place where I get educated; learn new subjects under the guidance of trained and skilled teachers. I study at a school that is near my home. It is one of the best schools in my entire town. The management of my school believes that it isn’t only academic excellence that we should be after, but also the overall personality development and evolving into a good and useful human being.

The school has two playgrounds – one is a tennis court and the other one is a cricket ground. We also have a nice swimming pool and a canteen. It also has a beautiful garden where students relax and play during recess. Even in games, sports and tournaments, it has made much progress. My school has won many trophies, shields, and medals in many extra-curricular activities. In debates also, the students of my school secure good positions. It is considered to be one of the best schools in my locality.

My School Essay 200 Words

The school is called the educational institution which is designed to provide learning spaces and create an environment for the children where the teaching of the students is under the direction and guidance of the teachers.

My School is one of the best educational institutions where I get an education and make progress towards the goals of my life and make me capable of achieving them. Besides education, there are several significant roles that my school plays in my life. My school is performing well in all fields. It develops my physical and mental stamina, instills confidence, and

gives me tremendous opportunities to prove my skills and talents in different fields. In the academic field, it has made a mark. Its students secure top positions in the board examinations.

I go to school with my other friends. We study in our school in a great friendly environment. We reach school at a fixed time. As soon as we reach we line up to attend the assembly. Attending the school assembly is a wonderful experience. I enjoy for being first in a row in a school assembly. As soon as the assembly ends we rush to our respective classrooms. We take part in all school activities. One of my school fellows is the best singer and dancer. She has recently won the best singer award at the annual arts festival. Our school organizes all-important national events like Independence Day, teachers’ day, father’s day, etc. My school also gives every student abundant opportunities to take part in extracurricular activities like sports and music.

All of us are proud of being a part of it. I am fortunate enough to be a student at this school. I love and am proud of my school.

My School Essay 300 Words

An institution where higher education is taught is commonly called a school, University College, or University. Most countries have systems of formal education, which is sometimes compulsory. In these systems, Students progress through a series of schools. The names for these schools vary by country but generally include primary school for young children and secondary school for teenagers who have completed primary education.

My school is a place where I not only get educated but also get trained in other necessary competitive skills like sports, music, and dance. I am proud of my school because it provides us with all the basic facilities like a big playground, a central library, a big auditorium hall, a science lab, and a good computer lab. That is why my school is rated as one of the best schools in my entire area. My school has produced many great people in my country. It has a big and beautiful building that looks shiny from far away. I reach my target at a fixed time. I came to school with other friends of mine. We happily enter the schools with great confidence. We take part in a school assembly and then we move into our classrooms.

This all is done by a very efficient and well-trained teaching staff of my school. The best schools are those that make the students the best and the best school is made by the best teachers. We study under the guidance of the best teachers. My school has a dedicated teacher for all the subjects as well as extracurricular activities like music and sports. I consider my school as the best school because it supports and encourages every student to do their best and make progress. Fortunately, my school provides the best environment, the best teachers, and the best facilities.

Our Class teacher greets us daily and asks about us. He is quite a cool and kind man. He entertains us along with teaching his subject. We learn a lot of things like discipline, self-help, confidence, and cooperation here. As I enter my classroom I feel quite happy and relaxed.

My School Essay 500 Words

The place where children as the leaders of tomorrow study and where the future of the nation is shaped are called schools. Education is an essential weapon for tomorrow, so the good schools of today are important for the best future of a nation. Schools are the center of learning where we attend classes on various subjects, interact with the teachers, get our queries

answered, and appeared in exams. In my school, learning is more like a fun activity, because of the extra-talented teaching staff.

My school is a government primary school located on the outskirts of the city. Usually, when people think about a government school, they perceive it to be at an isolated location and have poor basic amenities and teaching facilities. But, despite being a government school, my school defies all such speculations. Teachers of my school are not only knowledgeable about the subjects they teach but also are skilled enough to teach through fun activities. For example, our physics teacher explains every concept by stating real-life examples that we could relate to. This way we not only understand the subject better. Moreover, not a moment I remember, when any teacher had ever replied rudely to any of the students. They always patiently listen and provide answers to all the queries posed to them. Learning at my school is fun and it is made possible only because of the teachers.

My school is very important in my life, in a way even more than my family. My family gives me love, care, and affection, and provides for all my other essential needs. But, all of this isn’t enough to make me a good human being and succeed in life.  Favorably, I am lucky enough to be enrolled in a prestigious school, and gaining a wonderful education, looking forward to realizing my dreams one day. The most necessary for success in life is education, and only my school provides it to me. Without my school and the education that it gives, I would be like a confused and wandering soul, almost aimless in life.

My school helps with my educational and overall personality development. It imparts education through classes, tests, and exams to teach me how to conduct myself confidently. It just feels so great to be in my school and be a part of everyday activities, be it lectures, sports, or Something else. While in school, I always feel happy, confident, enthusiastic, and loved. I make friends at school, those whom I will never forget and will always love them. My family supports my materialistic needs, but school is the place where my actual physical, social, and mental development takes place.  I know that every question that crosses my mind will be answered by my teachers. I also know that my school friends will always be at my side whenever I need them to be. As much as the studies, my school also stresses much on These activities as the management thinks that extracurricular activities are very essential for our overall personality development. My school provides dedicated teachers and staff for each extracurricular activity. We have a big sports ground with kits for all the major sports; a covered auditorium for dance and music and a separate basketball court.

The role my school plays in my personality development is fantastic. It not only imparts education in me but also teaches me how to conduct myself and how to behave decently and properly. I get trained in all the other necessary skills of life, like how to keep calm in challenging situations and help others as well. My school teaches me to be a good and evolved human being, to stay composed and progressive always. It also teaches me to be kind and generous to others and not differentiate them based on their caste, religion, ethnicity, or other divisions. These are some of the most essential personality traits that my school imparts to me, something that I will always be thankful for. Every time I think of my school, I think of it as a temple of education. A temple, where my soul meets education, making my life more meaningful and useful to society and the nation as well. It is a place where my aspirations get a wing and I get the strength and confidence to realize them. No other place in the entire world could replace my school and the role that it plays in my life. I will always be thankful to my friends, teachers, and the staff of my school, for making it such a comfortable and Educational place of learning.

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I Got Divorced, and Now I Hate All My Clothes

After ending an 11-year relationship, my closest quickly turned into a gravesite, memorializing our life together.

I didn’t get married anticipating divorce. Nor did I, a fashion and beauty editor, expect to find all my garments suddenly unwearable. Yet there I was, alone in my bedroom, with a wardrobe full of nothing I wanted to wear.

I wish I could tell you there was a big, explosive blowout, a tantalizing scandal, or a major red flag that festered or metastasized beyond the point of reconciliation, but the sad truth is that we grew apart. And as the chasm between us became too wide to bridge, it felt easier to separate gracefully than to force a lifetime together.

After a breakup, most people wax melancholic about the landmarks they frequented, once-cherished memories that become almost too painful, too unbearable to hold onto— anecdotal souvenirs that they wish they could scrub clean, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind -style. Remember how happy we were there and there and there? For me, those tales are told in threads: There’s the Only NY long-sleeve I bought, because it was one of his favorite brands; a J.Crew sweater he gifted me during one of our first holidays together; the vintage Thierry Mugler suit I snagged on one of our trips to San Francisco; the navy ruched dress I wore to his friend’s wedding; and then, of course, there was our own wedding—the Calvin Klein Collection dress I got custom-made for the big day. My closet felt like a gravesite, memorializing all these moments we had together, large and small.

.css-1aear8u:before{margin:0 auto 0.9375rem;width:34px;height:25px;content:'';display:block;background-repeat:no-repeat;}.loaded .css-1aear8u:before{background-image:url(/_assets/design-tokens/elle/static/images/quote.fddce92.svg);} .css-1bvxk2j{font-family:SaolDisplay,SaolDisplay-fallback,SaolDisplay-roboto,SaolDisplay-local,Georgia,Times,serif;font-size:1.625rem;font-weight:normal;line-height:1.2;margin:0rem;margin-bottom:0.3125rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){.css-1bvxk2j{font-size:2.125rem;line-height:1.1;}}@media(min-width: 40.625rem){.css-1bvxk2j{font-size:2.125rem;line-height:1.2;}}@media(min-width: 64rem){.css-1bvxk2j{font-size:2.25rem;line-height:1.1;}}@media(min-width: 73.75rem){.css-1bvxk2j{font-size:2.375rem;line-height:1.2;}}.css-1bvxk2j b,.css-1bvxk2j strong{font-family:inherit;font-weight:bold;}.css-1bvxk2j em,.css-1bvxk2j i{font-style:italic;font-family:inherit;}.css-1bvxk2j i,.css-1bvxk2j em{font-style:italic;} We decided to separate in 2022 and officially filed for divorce a year later. Sartorially, I coped by not wanting to wear anything I owned—or anything at all.”

We were together 11 years—pretty much all of my 20s and the entirety of my time in New York. When so much of yourself is tethered to one person, when both of your lives become entirely enmeshed, it goes without saying that it’s exceedingly difficult to extricate yourself when it’s over. We decided to separate in 2022 and officially filed for divorce a year later. Sartorially, I coped by not wanting to wear anything I owned—or anything at all. “I just want to be naked!” I declared to anyone who asked how I was doing. One point, last summer, I said this while wearing a translucent, mini slip dress with nothing underneath except a teeny-tiny bralette and an equally teeny-tiny pair of hot pants.

“Well, it looks like you’re nearly there,” quipped a friend, her eyebrows raised.

The psychology behind post-breakup fashion is intuitive to grasp: A change in appearance, whether it be a haircut or your entire sartorial outlook, is a way to demarcate the end of one chapter and the start of another. You get a clean slate without having to wait to ring in a new year.

I want to make it absolutely clear: I wasn’t in an unhappy marriage, or a bad one for that matter. But in many ways I felt stuck and unseen. It’s hard to discern why I chose to dress the way I did—how does anyone? Pinpointing the reason can be as elusive as attempting to define a nebulous concept like love. The intricate makings of personal style are akin to hand-stitching fine lacework. Fleeting and abstract, so much of piecing together an outfit is based on a feeling . So for me to say I dressed all in black because I was in a sad marriage is reductive, and also wrong.

But I can say that I largely gravitated toward a restrained color palette. In my 20s, during a time when I was trying to prove myself as a writer and editor in a notoriously unkind, unforgiving industry, I wanted people to take me seriously, so I wore somber colors and modest styles—so modest, they bordered on puritanical. There was a period where hemlines hardly ever hiked higher than my shin. And those ankle-grazing skirts were often paired with baggy sweaters, oversized button-downs, or turtlenecks. My approach to fashion was austere, all clean lines and rigid, stark, minimalist silhouettes; I thought those were the trappings of Good Style. And anything outside of it (color, embellishments, skin-exposing cutouts) I considered frivolous and, quite frankly, gauche, and thus Bad. In retrospect, I imagine that a part of me wanted to hide behind my clothing.

I combed through my closet recently and tried on a dress I wore B.D. (Before Divorce). I was aghast at how shapeless it was, how much fabric there was, how blah and invisible I felt in it.”

And that inadvertently bled into how I dressed outside of work—or perhaps, it worked in tandem. My ex and I were both so focused on our careers that in our downtime together, we did nothing. I’m not entirely sure when things between us got to be so serious, but it reached a point where every moment, every activity, every conversation felt laden with an inexplicable weight. Spending time together was like wading through molasses, impossibly tough and tiresome. How I so badly wished there was lightness or laughter or joy, but what was missing was too blatant to ignore, despite how much I cared about him. And so, there was no desire to dress up. I hardly wore makeup. My nails were rarely painted. Apathy masqueraded as comfort. I combed through my closet recently and tried on a dress I wore B.D. (Before Divorce). I was aghast at how shapeless it was, how much fabric there was, how blah and invisible I felt in it.

Ripping our lives apart was a gut-wrenching process. Heartbreaking. A big part of why I held onto my marriage was because I had an all-consuming fear of starting over, which isn’t a good reason to stay in any relationship. But now, as a no-longer-married person—for the first time in over a decade—I’ve embarked on the long, unrelenting road of figuring out who I am, like Julia Roberts determining how she likes her eggs in Runaway Bride.

“Although the word divorce is often viewed as sad in one’s life, it can also be freeing. In a dysfunctional marriage, we can lose our sense of self and our own identity. And we may become very stifled in our creativity and growth,” Weiss says. “So post-divorce can offer an opportunity to explore different sides of ourselves. And fashion is the perfect outlet to show those changes.”

While I might want to parade around naked, the law—and common decency—forbids it. Instead, I’ve made some purchases: a vintage, cowl-neck metallic mini reminiscent of 2002 Paris Hilton, a collection of truncated tanks, a strappy bandeau, a curve-hugging mesh dress with up-to-there slits, and a two-piece sequin set. A friend called my new look “very Gen Z.” So many others have expressed their surprise. “That doesn’t seem like your style at all” has been the common refrain. Another said it looked like I was going through a midlife crisis, that maybe I should dress my age.

A part of me feels like I’m flailing, like I’m unsure of my footing and stumbling around like a toddler learning how to walk; another part exudes a level of confidence I haven’t felt in so long, maybe ever. For the first time, I’m experimenting with my style, no-holds-barred, and dressing in a way that makes me feel desirable, even pretty. There’s also the possibility that all of this coincides with just growing older and finally feeling comfortable in my skin.

For now, I’ll hold onto what delights me: itty-bitty midriff-exposing tops, micro hemlines, and see-through everything. Finally, these clothes have started to make my closet feel like mine again.

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Essay on Why I Love My School

School is not just a place where we go to learn; it’s a second home, filled with warmth, laughter, and endless opportunities. I love my school for various reasons, and each day brings new reasons to appreciate it.

Firstly, my school is like a big family where teachers are like caring parents, and classmates are like siblings. The friendly atmosphere makes me feel comfortable and happy to be there every day. The teachers not only teach us lessons from books but also valuable lessons about life, respect, and kindness.

Secondly, my school is a place where I can explore my interests and discover new passions. Whether it’s through extracurricular activities, clubs, or sports, there’s always something exciting happening. The school encourages us to participate and express ourselves, helping us grow into well-rounded individuals.

One of the things I love the most about my school is the sense of unity and teamwork. We work together on projects, help each other out, and celebrate our successes as a community. This camaraderie fosters a positive environment, making the learning experience enjoyable and memorable.

Furthermore, my school is equipped with modern facilities and resources that aid in effective learning. The library is a treasure trove of knowledge, the science labs are filled with intriguing experiments, and the sports facilities allow us to stay active and healthy. These resources enhance our learning experience and make studying more enjoyable.

Another reason I love my school is the emphasis on creativity and critical thinking. Teachers encourage us to ask questions, think independently, and express our thoughts freely. This approach not only helps us understand the subjects better but also prepares us for the challenges of the future.

Lastly, the memories I’ve created in my school are priceless. From fun-filled events like school fairs and cultural programs to simple moments of laughter with friends during lunch breaks, these memories make my school days unforgettable. The sense of nostalgia that comes with thinking about these moments fills my heart with joy.

I love my school for its welcoming atmosphere, diverse opportunities, supportive community, modern resources, emphasis on creativity, and the precious memories it has given me. My school is not just a place of learning; it’s a place where I’ve found friendship, knowledge, and a second home.

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