med school coach personal statement

How to Write a Powerful Personal Statement for Medical School

The personal statement can make or break your medical school application. Learn how to write it and strategies to make it stand out to admissions committees in this expert guide.

Posted January 10, 2024

Featuring Pravesh S.

How to Write the Work and Activities Section of the Med School Application

Tuesday, april 9.

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Essays are one of the most important parts of any graduate school application. Whereas your resume, letters of recommendation, and standardized test scores speak to your achievements and academic potential, your essays are where you can make a human argument based on your unique candidacy; they tell the story of a person rather than of numbers.

Typically, aspiring MD candidates will need to submit several essays. The personal statement or personal comments essay is submitted through the American Medical College Application Service (AMCAS), a centralized application that most medical schools use (outside of Texas), similar to the Common App. This application opens for submission around the end of May or the beginning of June. After you submit your AMCAS application, you’ll also need to submit a secondary application that goes directly to the schools you're applying to. Depending on the program, this may be open to everyone or extended on an invitation-only basis. This secondary application usually includes several other essays or short-answer questions that are more specific to what the school is looking for.

Though there is a standard that your scores, GPA, and experience need to meet, the essays really can make or break your chances of admission. In this article, we’ll go over what makes a good personal statement, how to get started on yours, and some actionable strategies for success.

What is the Personal Statement?

The “personal statement essay” can be found in section eight of the AMCAS application. The simple, vague prompt is as follows:

“Use the space provided to explain why you want to go to medical school.”

This prompt is purposefully left broad–the admissions committees want to see where applicants go in their responses. In short, they really want the answer to two things:

• Why should we admit you , specifically?
• Why medicine?

On its website, AMCAS says that this essay “provides an opportunity to distinguish yourself from other applicants and provide admissions officers with more insight into why you have chosen to pursue a career in medicine.” In other words, your response should make a compelling case for what you will bring to the table and clearly outline how your path so far has led you to medical school.

Med School Personal Statement Length

The personal comments essay has a character limit of 5,300, which includes spaces. This translates to about a page and a half worth of words. TMDSAS, the Texan equivalent of AMCAS, has a character limit of 5,000.

How Long Will My Personal Statement Take?

Like with any part of the application, timing is everything. Thankfully, medical school applications don’t require too much writing. Still, we recommend giving yourself at least a month on the personal statement (several if you're able to) so that you have time to iterate on a few different drafts, sit on it, and get feedback.

For more advice on timing the application process, read The Ultimate Guide to the Medical School Application Process .

How to Write a Med School Personal Statement

Often, the most difficult part is getting started; but, it’s hard to do so without a plan. Before you begin writing, it can be helpful to have an idea of your overarching narrative and the role that you want the essay to play. At a foundational level, you also just need to have a really solid understanding of who you are and what your motivations are for pursuing medicine. After all that, you’ll get to writing. Here’s a step-by-step playback for getting from start to finish on your personal statement.

Step 1: Ideate

Before you put pen to paper, think about the following questions and jot a few ideas down. If there are any that you’re struggling with, ask the people around you! Parents/guardians and close friends can be especially helpful in identifying your strengths and what makes you unique.

• What are the main life decisions I made in the last ten years and why did I make them? What values/thoughts/rationale remained consistent across these decisions?
• What character traits do I want to show the admissions committee? What are some examples of when I demonstrated these traits?
• What are my strengths and weaknesses?
• When did I first believe that I wanted to be a doctor? What experiences originally led to that and then later cemented it as a goal?
• What are the main takeaways from my clinical (and other relevant) experience? What did I learn? What stuck with me?
• What parts of my candidacy are not well represented in the other parts of my application?
• Why do I want to go med school? (get specific)
• What do I want my professional career to look like in 15 years? In 30?
• What motivates me–professionally and personally?

In any graduate school application, you’re trying to strike a balance between providing a comprehensive view of your candidacy and not overwhelming with unnecessary information. For this reason, it can be extremely valuable to have an idea of the overall story you want to tell. Think about your “elevator pitch” and use the essay to build on that. If you’re not sure what experiences or characteristics are the most impactful, you can also work with a coach . They’ll help you identify what’s most important to talk about, and to leave out, and can also work with you to draft an outline.

Step 2: Write a draft (it’s okay if it’s terrible)

Once you’ve got some direction, the next step is to just get your thoughts on paper. Sit down and force yourself to brain dump. It does not have to be pretty, it does not have to make sense, it does not have to be comprehensive. From there, leave it for a day. When you come back, highlight the parts that still resonate and make a note of anything missing.

Step 3: Review and edit, repeat

Based on the comments you left yourself on your preliminary thoughts, write a second draft. This time, pay a little more attention to the overall flow. Support your main ideas with real evidence in the form of stories and anecdotes. Be concise and get to the point–when your characters are limited, it’s important to not waste any on irrelevant details or extraneous verbiage. Once you’ve done this, set your draft aside for a bit. Come back to it later and make it better. Then, repeat the process. To get a really good personal statement, you’re going to want to go through many different drafts.

Step 4: Get feedback

Once you’ve got a draft that you feel good about, we highly recommend getting a second perspective. The ideal editor is someone who has a basic understanding of your background but does not know you in-depth, as this would make it difficult for them to judge the essay objectively. A friend-of-a-friend, friend-of-a-mentor, professor, or med school admissions coach are all great choices. It’s a bonus if they have any kind of writing or editorial experience.

This third-party review will help you figure out what’s working and what’s not. From this point, and depending on the feedback, you may be close to a final draft.

Step 5: Read it out loud

We know–this sounds weird, but do it. When you read your essay out loud, you hear it as the admissions committee member will. It’s easier to find the gaps, identify missing transitions, see where you’re rambling, and get an overall idea of the impression it gives.

Step 6: Review, final edits, and spellcheck

Once you feel really, really good about your response, read it for a final time. Make sure that there are no grammatical or spelling errors. Then, you’ll copy and paste it into section eight of the AMCAS application, and it’s ready to go!

Caution: Don’t overdo it

Though it’s better to err on the side of too much editing over too little, it is possible to overdo it. If you stare at your writing long enough, everything starts to sound the same. And, for those of us who are perfectionists, it’s easy to feel like it’s never good enough . In most cases, it probably is. There comes to a point where you’ve done all you can and it’s time to submit. A good coach can help you gauge when this is but it also takes knowing yourself. If you start to get overwhelmed or frustrated, it’s completely okay (and even beneficial) to step back for a few days. Then, when you return, you’re coming in with a fresh and slightly more removed perspective.

Med School Recommender Prep Template + Example

The letters of evaluation are an integral part of the medical school application process and can make or break your candidacy. To get great ones, it is not enough to simply ask your professor or prehealth committee to write one. Instead, you need to adequately prepare and support your evaluators from start to finish. The best way to do this is with a Recommender Prep Doc, which you provide to your recommenders after they've agreed to write your letter. It includes the schools you're applying to along with their deadlines and sample content that they can use to support their letter.

Put in your email below and we'll send you our coach-approved Recommender Prep Doc Template + Example , straight to your inbox.

Medical School Personal Statement Tips

Now that we’ve covered what the personal statement is and how to get it written, we’ll dive into some specifics on how to make it great , including things to do and avoid .

Lean into what makes you different from the other applicants

After reading your personal statement, you want the admissions committees to think, “If we don’t admit this person right now, we might never get another applicant like them!” No pressure, right? Just kidding, we know this is tough to do! You will come from the same schools as other applicants and have the same majors, the same work experiences, the same hometowns, and the same GPAs. What’s different is how you went through all of that. Your perspective, how you interact with the world, and what you take away are all unique to you.

In the examples you share and your overall argument for admission, make sure you address this and don’t be afraid to get specific. A good test is this: if someone else could have written your exact same personal statement, it’s not unique enough.

Know what your personal statement is not

You’re applying to medical schools, not creative writing programs. With this in mind, your personal statement should not be an exercise in writing the most experimental personal statement. The power in personal statements comes from the applicant’s background and story, not their writing abilities. To be clear, your statement should still be written well; but, you don’t need to get too fancy.

Don’t lose sight of the prompt

With broader topics like this, it’s easy to get sucked into a tangent and pretty soon, you’re giving your entire life story. And, while you do want to explain your path, you’re doing so with a specific reason in mind. Your personal statement should explain exactly why you want to be a physician . If your stories aren’t directly relevant to that purpose, take them out.

For this, it can be helpful to examine your personal statement paragraph by paragraph. Imagine your response without that section–does the primary message still get across? Is it contributing something valuable or is it extraneous?

Don’t recite your resume

This is your classic “show, don’t tell” advice. Use examples to support the qualities that you want the adcom to see, rather than listing your accomplishments and what you think they demonstrate. Here’s an example:

• Applicant 1: For two years, I shadowed a family physician in my city where I learned the day-to-day responsibilities required to succeed in the field.
• Applicant 2: For two years, I shadowed a family physician in my city. This taught me how successful doctors in this field need to understand a variety of issues, problem-solve constantly, and develop real relationships with their patients.

Which one is more compelling? They’re essentially saying the same thing, but the second applicant explains what the first only claims.

Keep the focus on you

You are the main character of the personal statement. While many stories will also involve other people–mentors, patients, friends, family members, etc…–make sure that the focus remains on what you demonstrated. That’s not to say you should only have stories that don’t include others. Tell the same stories but do so in a way that highlights the role you played.

When you’re reviewing any given anecdote, ask yourself: “What does the admissions committee learn about me from this?” If you can’t point to direct and specific things, it needs to be reworked.

This is enough to get you started on your personal statements, but the best way to make sure that you have a powerful, genuine response is to work one-on-one with a med school admissions coach. It can be tough to find an authoritative and objective second opinion, and that’s where a coach steps in. Find one that matches your background, goals, and budget here . Below are some of our most popular and highest-rated coaches.

Here are a few other articles you may find helpful:

How to Write a Standout Internal Medicine Personal Statement

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2024 How to Write a Medical School Personal Statement (11 Steps)

• By Med School Insiders
• December 2, 2023
• Medical Student , Pre-med
• Medical School Application , Personal Statement

Each piece of a med school application brings a unique set of anxiety-ridden challenges, but few equal that of the personal statement. A personal statement is much, much more than a narrative-version of your CV. Reiterating your grades and extracurriculars in complete sentences is not how to write a medical school personal statement.

A personal statement is an opportunity to tell your story. Why do you want to study medicine? What drives you? This is your chance to let an admissions committee know who you really are beyond your grades.

Of course, you’re studying to become a doctor, not a novelist, which means the idea of crafting your personal statement may seem daunting, to say the least.

In this guide, we’ll take a comprehensive, step-by-step look at how to write a medical school personal statement, including how to get started, everything you need to include, and common mistakes to avoid.

Article Sections

• Anatomy of Medical School Personal Statement

What Med School Admissions Committees Look For

How to get started.

• How to Write a Personal Statement

Common Mistakes to Avoid

Medical school personal statement examples, anatomy of a medical school personal statement.

A personal statement has a 5,300 character maximum, about 1.5 pages of single-spaced 12-point Times New Roman font. The challenge isn’t trying to fill in words; the challenge is selecting the key moments in your life that made you want to be a doctor and expressing them concisely.

A personal statement is made up of three parts:

Introduction

It’s essentially a short essay that uses your life experience to succinctly demonstrate why you’re the right person for the job. If someone’s making a movie about your life and the events that shaped your desire to become a doctor, what key moments do you want to highlight?

Your introduction must capture an admissions committee’s attention. Use the introduction to hook your readers. The first few sentences should entice them to read more.

There isn’t a perfect number of paragraphs or set structure. This is where you discuss the experiences that have shaped your personality, your desire to study medicine, and your dreams for the future.

This is the summary of your statement, and it should tie in directly to your introduction. Now is the time to emphasize why you want to be a physician and your future goals.

Learn more about the Anatomy of a Stellar Medical School Personal Statement .

Admissions committees need to know they’re accepting students who are ready to face the rigorous day-and-night grind of medical school. They have your CV and transcripts; now you need to demonstrate you have what it takes to succeed.

The personal statement is your chance to display your personality and highlight the experiences that shaped you. What drives you? What strengths and experiences will you bring to medical school? Why are you an asset?

The admissions committee isn’t looking for a list of your accomplishments. They want to know your story . Don’t tell the admissions committee you’re compassionate and driven; show them with tangible examples from your life.

So you’re a great listener. What’s a moment in your past that demonstrates this? If you care deeply about the wellbeing of others, what story from your life illustrates that passion?

1 | Read Real Personal Statement Examples

Right off the bat, it’s important to remember that you’re not alone—far from it. Every medical student who came before you has written personal statements, which means you have a wealth of examples to read and learn from.

Every personal statement is unique to the writer. Don’t expect to find a perfect blueprint you can copy off of, but reading several different personal statements will give you a sense of the themes, concepts, strategies, and stories that can help you find success.

If you know people in your own life who have successfully matriculated to med school, it’s a good idea to ask them if you can take a look at their personal statement. Med School Insiders compiled a database of personal statements donated by successful medical school applicants. Reading successful personal statements will give you an idea of what’s expected.

Reading bad personal statements can also give you an idea of what mistakes to avoid. Learn from our bad personal statement examples , which includes key insights into what you should do instead.

2 | Reflect on Past Experiences

Take this as an opportunity to reflect. Don’t think of it as brainstorming, and don’t worry about being creative just yet. Simply think back on key moments from your past.

Think of your personal statement like your superhero origin story. You may have excellent grades, abilities, and a natural aptitude for science, but why are you pursuing medicine? What moment or moments in your life revealed to you why you had to be a doctor?

Take Spider-Man. Yes, Peter Parker received his superpowers from a radioactive spider bite, but that’s not why he fights crime; Spider-Man fights crime so that what happened to his Uncle Ben never happens to anyone else. Bruce Wayne is incredibly smart, incredibly strong, and incredibly rich, but that’s not why he fights crime as Batman. Bruce Wayne became Batman so that no one else would lose their parents to a random act of violence like he did.

The truth is, a lot of superheroes have pretty similar motivations, and doctors have similar motivations, too. Your desire to become a doctor likely stems from a genuine intellectual interest in medicine, a desire to work closely with other humans, and a drive to help people and save lives. The other med school hopefuls you’re applying with have very similar motivations.

The key is digging deep and determining what you value most about becoming a doctor. Once you know that, think about the tangible experiences in your life that helped you realize those values.

Utilize our list of 25 medical school personal statement prompts as you ideate and reflect on your life to date.

3 | Choose Which Experiences/Traits to Highlight

Identify three to four personal strengths you are particularly proud of and want the admissions committee to know. Where did these strengths shine in your premedical years? What experiences helped you build on these strengths? This will make up the body of your personal statement.

Remember: writing a personal statement takes time—and lots of it. It will likely take several different attempts and drafts. After discussing your selected strengths, you may find that they don’t define you well enough or that there are better options. Don’t be discouraged. Give yourself plenty of time to reflect on and explore a variety of different strengths.

Don’t forget about the interview; the admissions committee will certainly ask you to further elaborate on the experiences outlined in your personal statement. Share personal stories that you want to be asked about and feel comfortable addressing.

Generally, personal statements involve experiences in the following categories:

• A passion for patient interaction
• Intellectual curiosity for medicine (academics, research, etc.)
• Dedication and discipline (medicine or another pursuit)
• Perseverance in the face of adversity
• Interpersonal and professional skills

How to Write a Medical School Personal Statement

4 | show, don’t tell.

If essays or storytelling aren’t necessarily your strong suit, think back to math class and those equations where the teacher made you show your work for the full grade. It’s not enough that you got the answer right; you had to show how you arrived at the answer.

Think of this in the same way. It’s great that you’re compassionate, but the admissions committee isn’t going to take you at your word. They want you to back up that claim with evidence. It is vital that you show the admissions committee you’re compassionate with concrete examples from your life that illustrate your journey to medicine.

It’s much more impactful to share a story that demonstrates specific qualities than it is to tell someone you have those qualities directly. Saying you are hardworking or resilient is not enough. You need to craft a story that allows the reader to infer those qualities about you.

5 | Leverage the Narrative-Based Approach

You are applying to medical school along with an immense number of other students with great grades, stellar qualifications, and impressive clinical hours. These are all key to your medical school application, but the best grades in the world won’t set you apart in the eyes of the admissions committee.

Your personal statement is a chance to stand out in a crowded field. Too many personal statements read like a CV but with full paragraphs, which quickly becomes monotonous.

Leverage a narrative-based approach so that the admissions committee is excited to learn more about you. Your entire application should illustrate your compelling journey toward becoming a doctor. Highlight how your experiences make you an asset who will contribute uniquely to the medical school.

It’s not enough to simply check off the boxes. The admissions committee wants to know your story.

Learn How to Develop a Cohesive Narrative for Medical School Applications .

6 | Create an Outline

After taking the time to reflect on the experiences and traits you want to include in your personal statement, create an outline to structure your approach .

You do not need to stick to it, but this is the general structure of most personal statements:

• Introduction (A strong hook to catch the reader’s attention—usually an anecdote or reflection that introduces the theme of your story. Hook the reader with the opening sentence.)
• Experience 1
• Experience 2
• Experience 3
• Conclusion (Tie your story back to the opening hook/theme. Summarize why you want to be a physician and what your future goals are.)

Remember, this is not a list of your accomplishments. The personal statement must read like a cohesive narrative, not a resume.

Establish a theme in the introduction that’s central to your desire to become a doctor. Each following paragraph will illustrate how your personal experiences have shaped that desire and prepared you for your journey. In the conclusion, gracefully tie back to your central theme or hook to turn the personal statement into a consistent, interconnected story.

7 | Force Yourself to Start Writing

It’s understandable and common to feel overwhelmed while writing a personal statement. In fact, if you don’t feel overwhelmed, it’s safe to say that you’re not taking this seriously enough.

Start with a theme, but don’t get stuck trying to come up with the perfect opening sentence. That comes later. Once you have a general outline, just start writing. See what happens, and—most importantly—be kind to yourself.

The first words you write won’t be perfect, but they will get you started. You should fully expect the first draft of your personal statement to be terrible. That’s okay. First drafts are never perfect.

Your first draft probably won’t look anything like your final essay. Put one foot in front of the other and just start writing. Get the ideas out and worry about editing later.

8 | Keep it Concise and Direct

In your subsequent drafts, focus on cutting down your words and being concise. It’s not your use of flowery language that will impress the admissions committee. Forget about extravagant word choices and convoluted sentence structure. You don’t have the space for poetic tangents anyway.

Use your words efficiently, and favor clear language over long, complicated words. It’s easy for readers to spot when you’re using a thesaurus, and it will only take away from your end message. Find the simplest way to say something.

For example:

Hard-working over Assiduous

Compassion over Magnanimity

Agree over Concur

Use tools like the Hemingway App to keep your language direct and concise.

9 | Take Some Time Away

Take time away from your drafts. Once you complete a draft, take a break, and let it sit. Go for a walk, watch some TV, or work on a completely different activity. After your break, come back to your personal statement with fresh eyes. You may find that the fantastic opening line you came up with isn’t so fantastic anymore, or that sentence you weren’t so sure about actually works really well.

Writing your personal statement will take time. Even if you feel extremely confident in your personal statement, take time away from it and come back.

10 | Refine, Review, and Edit

We recommend using editing apps like Grammarly and Hemingway Editor , but don’t rely on bots alone to catch possible mistakes.

Ask your friends and family for their first impressions on the content of your personal statement. Tell them to be brutally honest (because the admissions committee certainly will be.) Reach out to a mentor or people who have been through this process before.

Spelling or grammar mistakes indicate carelessness on your part and are an automatic red flag for admissions committees. Read over your work carefully, and ask others you trust to do the same.

The editing process is such a critical phase for your personal statement. Learn how to edit your personal statement to impress admissions committees.

11 | Invest in Essay Editing Services

Your medical school personal statement is arguably the most important piece of your application. While an excellent essay can lock-in your interview offer, a poorly-written personal statement can ruin your chances—even with stellar grades, impressive academic awards, and a notable list of extracurriculars.

Don’t risk your acceptance. Essay editing services can provide the help that friends, family, and mentors cannot.

Med School Insiders Personal Statement Editing Services includes careful analysis of content and tone as well as helpful insights into how you can improve your essay and impress admissions committees.

Avoid the following common personal statement mistakes .

• Don’t list your accomplishments or rehash your CV and extracurriculars.
• Don’t make spelling or grammar errors.
• Don’t overuse the word I. Doing so makes you more likely to state your accomplishments instead of telling a story.
• Don’t use flowery language or words you found in a thesaurus.
• Don’t explain to a physician what medicine is all about. Talk about yourself and your experiences; the admissions committee already understands medicine.
• Don’t state the obvious or use clichés. (Every applicant likes science and wants to help people.)
• Don’t lie or fabricate your personal stories.
• Don’t make excuses for poor grades or a low MCAT score.
• Don’t speak negatively about another physician or healthcare professional.
• Don’t plead for an interview or acceptance.
• Don’t edit your personal statement by yourself.
• Don’t procrastinate.

Learn more: 20 Personal Statement: Dos and Don’ts .

It’s important to read the personal statements of matriculated students. While you won’t be able to mimic someone else’s personal statement, you can still learn a lot from them, and reading different statements can spark ideas for your own essay.

We compiled a selection of real medical school personal statements from successful applicants. These statements are for reference purposes only and should not be plagiarized in any way. Plagiarism detection software is used when evaluating personal statements, and plagiarizing is grounds for an automatic disqualification.

Be sure to read the included feedback regarding the personal statements as well, as this will give you extra insight into what admissions committees are looking for.

Read Real Medical School Personal Statement Examples .

Medical School Personal Statement Editing

Don’t write your medical school personal statement alone—we can help. Med School Insiders offers a range of personal statement editing packages , from general editing to unlimited, in-depth editing with a physician who will be there to advise you every step of the way.

Learn more about our Comprehensive Medical School Admissions Packages . Our team of doctors has years of experience serving on admissions committees, so you’ll receive key insights from people who have been intimately involved with the selection process.

Next read: Guide to Understanding the Medical School Application Process

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Customer Note Premed Preclinical Med Student Clinical Med Student

4 Medical School Personal Statement Examples

The personal statement can be one of the most challenging parts of your medical school application process. You want to show admissions committees the qualities that make you stand out while avoiding cliches. After all, a lot is riding on this essay. Don’t panic. We’ve done our homework, talked to insiders, and gathered firsthand personal statements to help you get started.

Getting Started

Before diving into the personal statement examples, here are some tips on framing your experiences to wow admissions officers.

1. Stick to your real-life experiences. While it’s great to express what you want to do in healthcare in the future, that doesn’t really set you apart. All premed students have goals for what they’ll do in the medical profession, but this often changes after time in medical school. Telling a personal story instead gives admission committee members a look at who you already are and if you have the qualities they deem desirable for med school .

Feel free to mention specialties you’re passionate about and touch on your clinical experience, but make sure the experiences you discuss are unique.

2. Build an in-depth narrative. Nobody wants to read a blanket summary of your research experience. This is your chance to get passionate and demonstrate some communication skills. Explain the driving force behind your desire to work in the medical field.

The old writing rule comes into play here: “show, don’t tell.” You will always capture your reader’s attention more by telling a story than by explaining a circumstance. Medical school admissions committees are no different. Showing them your strong work ethic — or dedication, or whatever personal quality you want — without just saying, “I have a strong work ethic” will have a greater impact.

3. Don’t include metrics. Admissions officers already have access to your GPA and MCAT scores. If they want to know how you did in biochemistry, they can find out. Don’t waste space here. If you’re concerned about those numbers, it’s much more important to nail the personal statement and secure a secondary application and eventual medical school interview.

4. Know the character limits — and try to meet them. Both AACOMAS and AMCAS applications have a character limit of 5,300. You do not necessarily need to use all 5,300 characters, but you also don’t want it to be under 3,000. You want to use as many as possible while staying on topic and being relevant. A too-short essay can look careless.

5. Get comfortable with revising . You’ll do it a lot. Expect your first draft to be just that – a first draft. This writing process will take several weeks, if not months. Once you’re confident in your essay, ask for feedback. Avoid asking family members (unless they’re experts in the field of medicine). Instead, have professors, mentors, and peers read it and offer notes.

|| Read more about capturing readers from the first paragraph with our Medical School Personal Statement Storytelling Guide . ||

6. Use coaching to craft the perfect essay. Personal statements like the ones below only come after countless hours of brainstorming and writing drafts. However, with MedSchoolCoach , you’ll work with professional writing advisors step-by-step to develop an impactful medical school personal statement.

|| Check out more Tips for Writing a Personal Statement ||

Personal Statement Example #1

Our second essay contest winner was a medical student who made their submission an AMCAS personal statement . It serves as a great and effective medical school personal statement example . We also thought it was a good read overall!

A four-letter word for “dignitary.” The combinations surge through my mind: emir? agha? tsar? or perhaps the lesser-used variant, czar? I know it’s also too early to rule out specific names – there were plenty of rulers named Omar – although the clue is suspiciously unspecific. Quickly my eyes jump two columns to the intersecting clue, 53-Across, completely ignoring the blur outside the window that indicates my train has left the Times Square station. “Nooks’ counterparts.” I am certain the answer is “crannies.” This means 49-Down must end in r, so I eliminate “agha” in my mind. Slowly, the pieces come together, the wordplay sending my brain into mental gymnastics. At the end of two hours, I find myself staring at a completed crossword puzzle, and as trivial as it is, it is one of the greatest feelings in the world.

As an avid cruciverbalist, I have a knack for problem-solving. I fell in love with another kind of puzzle in college: organic chemistry. While some of my peers struggled with its complexity, the notion of analyzing mass spectroscopy, IR spectrums, and H-NMR to identify a specific molecule invigorated me. The human body was a fantastic mystery to me in my biology classes. Intricacies such as hormonal up- and down-regulation pulled at the riddler in me; I was not satisfied until I understood the enigma of how the body worked. Graduate school at Columbia was an extension of this craving, and I chose a thesis topic to attempt to elucidate the sophisticated workings of neuro-hormonal balance peri-bariatric surgery.

In non-academic settings, I also pursued activities that would sharpen my intellect. The act of teaching is a form of problem-solving; a good teacher finds the most effective way to convey information to students. So I accepted the challenge and taught in both international and domestic settings. I assumed leadership positions in church because it forced me to think critically to resolve conflicts. In the lab, I volunteered to help write a review on the biological mechanisms of weight regain. It was precisely what I loved: isolating a specific human phenomenon and investigating how it worked.

I believe medicine and puzzles are in the same vein. After participating in health fairs, working at a clinic, and observing physicians, I understand that pinpointing a patient’s exact needs is difficult at times. In a way, disease itself can be a puzzle, and doctors sometimes detect it only one piece at a time – a cough here, lanugo there. Signs and symptoms act as clues that whittle down the possibilities until only a few remain. Then all that is left is to fill in the word and complete the puzzle. Voila!

Actually, it is more complicated than that, and inevitably the imperfect comparison falls through.

I distinctly remember a conversation I had with a psychiatric patient at Aftercare. He had just revealed his identity as Batman — but it turns out he was also Jesus. During downtime between tests, he decided to confide in me some of his dreams and aspirations. He swiftly pulled out a sketchpad and said confidently, “When I get better, I’m going back to art school.” Any doubts stemming from his earlier ramblings vanished at the sight of his charcoal-laden sheets filled with lifelike characters. “They’re… really good,” I stammered. I was looking for the right words to say, but there are times when emotions are so overwhelming that words fail. I nodded in approval and motioned that we should get back to testing.

Those next few hours of testing flew by as I ruminated on what I had experienced. After working 3 years at the clinic, I got so caught up in the routine of “figuring out” brain function that I missed the most important aspect of the job: the people. And so, just as the crossword puzzle is a 15×15 symbol of the cold New York streets, a person is the polar opposite. Our patients are breathing, fluid, and multi-dimensional. I’ve come to love both, but there is nothing I want more in the world than to see a broken person restored, a dream reignited, to see Mr. Batman regain sanity and take up art school again. The prospect of healing others brings me joy, surpassing even the most challenging crosswords in the Sunday paper.

This is why I feel called to a life in medicine. It is the one profession that allows me to restore others while thinking critically and appreciating human biology. I am passionate about people, and medicine allows me to participate in their lives in a tangible way, aligned with my interest in biology and problem-solving skill.

The New York Times prints a new puzzle daily, and so does the Washington Post, USA Today, and the list continues. The unlimited supply of puzzles mirrors the abundance of human disease and the physician’s ongoing duty to unravel the mystery, to resolve the pain. A great cruciverbalist begins with the basics of learning “crosswordese,” a nuanced language; I am prepared to do the same with health, starting with my education in medical school. Even so, I am always humbled by what little I know and am prepared to make mistakes and learn along the way. After all, I would never do a crossword puzzle in pen.

||Read Our First Essay Contest Winner: Considerations Before Applying to Medical School ||

||Read The Formula For A Good Personal Statement | |

Personal Statement Example #2

Student Accepted to Case Western SOM, Washington University SOM, University of Utah SOM, Northwestern University Feinberg SOM

With a flick and a flourish, the tongue depressor vanished, and a coin suddenly appeared behind my ear. Growing up, my pediatrician often performed magic tricks, making going to the doctor feel like literal magic. I believed all healthcare facilities were equally mystifying, especially after experiencing a different type of magic in the organized chaos of the Emergency Department. Although it was no place for a six-year-old, childcare was often a challenge, and while my dad worked extra shifts in nursing school to provide for our family, I would find myself awed by the diligence and warmth of the healthcare providers.

Though I associated the hospital with feelings of comfort and care, it sometimes became a place of fear and uncertainty. One night, my two-year-old brother, Sean, began vomiting and coughing non-stop. My dad was deployed overseas, so my mother and I had no choice but to spend the night at the hospital, watching my brother slowly recover with the help of the healthcare providers. Little did I know, it would not be long before I was in the same place. Months later, I became hospitalized with pneumonia with pleural effusions, and as I struggled to breathe, I was terrified of having fluid sucked out of my chest. But each day, physicians comforted me, asking how I was, reassuring me that I was being taken care of, and explaining any questions related to my illness and treatment. Soon, I became excited to speak with the infectious disease doctor and residents, absorbing as much as possible about different conditions.

I also came to view the magic of healing through other lenses. Growing up, Native American traditions were an important aspect of my life as my father was actively involved with native spirituality, connecting back to his Algonquin heritage. We often attended Wi-wanyang-wa-c’i-pi ceremonies or Sun Dances for healing through prayer and individuals making personal sacrifices for their community. Although I never sun danced, I spent hours in inipis chewing on osha root, finding my healing through songs.

In addition to my father’s heritage, healing came from the curanderismo traditions of Peru, my mother’s home. She came from a long line of healers using herbal remedies and ceremonies for healing the mind, body, energy, and soul. I can still see my mother preparing oils, herbs, and incense mixtures while performing healing rituals. Her compassion and care in healing paralleled the Emergency Department healthcare providers. 

Through the influence of these early life experiences, I decided to pursue a career in the health sciences. Shortly after starting college, I entered a difficult time in my life as I struggled with health and personal challenges. I suddenly felt weak and tired most days, with aches all over my body. Soon, depression set in. I eventually visited a doctor, and through a series of tests, we discovered I had hypothyroidism. During this time, I also began dealing with unprocessed childhood trauma. I decided to take time off school, and with thyroid replacement hormones and therapy, I slowly began to recover. But I still had ways to go, and due to financial challenges, I decided to continue delaying my education and found work managing a donut shop. Unbeknownst to me, this experience would lead to significant personal growth by working with people from all walks of life and allowing me time for self-reflection. I continuously reflected on the hospital experiences that defined my childhood and the unmatched admiration I had for healthcare workers. With my renewed interest in medicine, I enrolled in classes to get my AEMT license and gain more medical experience. 

As my health improved, I excelled in my classes, and after craving the connections of working with others, I became a medical assistant. In this position, I met “Marco,” a patient traveling from Mexico for treatment. Though I spoke Spanish while growing up, I had little experience as a medical interpreter. However, I took the opportunity to talk with him to learn his story. Afterward, he became more comfortable, and I walked him through the consultation process, interpreting the physician’s words and Marco’s questions. This moment showed me the power of connecting with others in their native language. As a result, I began volunteering at a homeless clinic to continue bridging the language barrier for patients and to help advocate for the Latinx community and those who struggle to find their voice. 

My journey to becoming a doctor has been less direct than planned; however, my personal trials and tribulations have allowed me to meet and work with incredible people who have been invaluable to my recovery and personal development. Most importantly, I have seen the value of compassionate and empathetic care. Though I have not recently witnessed any sleight of hand or vanishing acts, what healthcare providers do for patients can only be described as magic.

I look forward to bringing my diverse background as a physician and expanding my abilities to help patients in their path to healing.

||Read: But I Don’t Have 15 Activities ! | Apply to Med School After 3rd or 4th Year? ||

Personal Statement Example #3

Student accepted to Weill Cornell

My path to medicine was first influenced by early adolescent experiences trying to understand my place in society. Though I was not conscious of it then, I held a delicate balance between my identity as an Indian-American and an “American-American.” 

In a single day, I could be shooting hoops and eating hotdogs at school while spending the evening playing Carrom and enjoying tandoori chicken at a family get-together. When our family moved from New York to California, I had the opportunity to attend a middle school with greater diversity, so I learned Spanish to salve the loss of moving away and assimilate into my new surroundings.

As I partook in related events and cuisine, I built a mixed friend group and began understanding how culture influences our perception of those around us. While volunteering at senior centers in high school, I noticed a similar pattern to what I sometimes saw: seniors socializing in groups of shared ethnicity and culture. Moving from table to table and language to language, I also observed how each group shared different life experiences and perspectives on what constitutes health and wellness. Many seniors talked about barriers to receiving care or how their care differed from what they had envisioned. Listening to their stories on cultural experiences, healthcare disparities, and care expectations sparked my interest in becoming a physician and providing care for the whole community.

Intrigued by the science behind perception and health, I took electives during my undergraduate years to build a foundation in these domains. In particular, I was amazed by how computational approaches could help model the complexity of the human mind, so I pursued research at Cornell’s Laboratory of Rational Decision-Making. Our team used fMRI analysis to show how the framing of information affects cognitive processing and perception. Thinking back to my discussions with seniors, I often wondered if more personalized health-related messaging could positively influence their opinions. Through shadowing, I witnessed physicians engaging in honest and empathetic conversations to deliver medical information and manage patients’ expectations, but how did they navigate delicate conflicts where the patients’ perspectives diverged from their own?

My question was answered when I became a community representative for the Ethics Committee for On Lok PACE, an elderly care program. One memorable case was that of Mr. A.G, a blind 86-year-old man with radiation-induced frontal lobe injury who wanted to return home and cook despite his doctor’s expressed safety concerns. Estranged from his family, Mr. A.G. relied on cooking to find fulfillment. Recognizing the conflict between autonomy and beneficence, I joined the physicians in brainstorming and recommending ways he could cook while being supervised.

I realized that the role of a physician was to mediate between the medical care plan and the patient’s wishes to make a decision that preserves their dignity. As we considered possibilities, the physicians’ genuine concern for the patient’s emotional well-being exemplified the compassion I want to emulate as a future doctor. Our discussions emphasized the rigor of medicine — the challenge of ambiguity and the importance of working with the individual to serve their needs.

With COVID-19 ravaging our underserved communities, my desire to help others drove me towards community-based health as a contact tracer for my county’s Department of Public Health. My conversations uncovered dozens of heartbreaking stories that revealed how socioeconomic status and job security inequities left poorer families facing significantly harsher quarantines than their wealthier counterparts.

Moreover, many residents expressed fear or mistrust, such as a 7-person family who could not safely isolate in their one-bedroom and one-bath apartment. I offered to arrange free hotel accommodations but was met with a guarded response from the father: “We’ll be fine. We can maintain the 6 feet.” While initially surprised, I recognized how my government affiliation could lead to a power dynamic that made the family feel uneasy. Thinking about how to make myself more approachable, I employed motivational interviewing skills and small talk to build rapport. 

When we returned to discussing the hotel, he trusted my intentions and accepted the offer. Our bond of mutual trust grew over two weeks of follow-ups, leaving me humbled yet gratified to see his family transition to a safer living situation. As a future physician, I realize I may encounter many first-time or wary patients; and I feel prepared to create a responsive environment that helps them feel comfortable about integrating into our health system.

Through my clinical and non-clinical experiences, I have witnessed the far-reaching impact of physicians, from building lasting connections with patients to being a rock of support during uncertain times. I cannot imagine a career without these dynamics—of improving the health and wellness of patients, families, and society and reducing healthcare disparities. While I know the path ahead is challenging, I am confident I want to dedicate my life to this profession.

Personal Statement Example #4

Student Accepted to UCSF SOM, Harvard Medical School

Countless visits to specialists in hope of relief left me with a slew of inconclusive test results and uncertain diagnoses. “We cannot do anything else for you.” After twelve months of waging a war against my burning back, aching neck and tingling limbs, hearing these words at first felt like a death sentence, but I continued to advocate for myself with medical professionals. 

A year of combatting pain and dismissal led me to a group of compassionate and innovative physicians at the Stanford Pain Management Center (SPMC). Working alongside a diverse team including pain management specialists and my PCP, I began the long, non-linear process of uncovering the girl that had been buried in the devastating rubble of her body’s pain. 

From struggling with day-to-day activities like washing my hair and sitting in class to thriving as an avid weightlifter and zealous student over the span of a year, I realized I am passionate about preventing, managing and eliminating chronic illnesses through patient-centered incremental care and medical innovation.

A few days after my pain started, I was relieved to hear that I had most likely just strained some muscles, but after an empty bottle of muscle relaxers, the stings and aches had only intensified. I went on to see 15 specialists throughout California, including neurologists, physiatrists, and rheumatologists. Neurological exams. MRIs. Blood tests. All inconclusive.

Time and time again, specialists dismissed my experience due to ambiguous test results and limited time. I spent months trying to convince doctors that I was losing my body; they thought I was losing my mind. Despite these letdowns, I did not stop fighting to regain control of my life. Armed with my medical records and a detailed journal of my symptoms, I continued scheduling appointments with the intention of finding a doctor who would dig deeper in the face of the unknown.

Between visits, I researched my symptoms and searched for others with similar experiences. One story on Stanford Medicine’s blog, “Young Woman Overcomes Multiple Misdiagnoses and Gets Her Life Back”, particularly stood out to me and was the catalyst that led me to the SPMC. After bouncing from doctor to doctor, I had finally found a team of physicians who would take the profound toll of my pain on my physical and mental well-being seriously.

Throughout my year-long journey with my care team at the SPMC, I showed up for myself even when it felt like I would lose the war against my body. I confronted daily challenges with fortitude. When lifting my arms to tie my hair into a ponytail felt agonizing, YouTube tutorials trained me to become a braiding expert. Instead of lying in bed all day when my medication to relieve nerve pain left me struggling to stay awake, I explored innovative alternative therapies with my physicians; after I was fed up with the frustration of not knowing the source of my symptoms, I became a research subject in a clinical trial aimed at identifying and characterizing pain generators in patients suffering from “mysterious” chronic pain.

At times, it felt like my efforts were only resulting in lost time. However, seeing how patient my care team was with me, offering long-term coordinated support and continually steering me towards a pain-free future, motivated me to grow stronger with every step of the process. Success was not an immediate victory, but rather a long journey of incremental steps that produced steady, life-saving progress over time.

My journey brought me relief as well as clarity with regard to how I will care for my future patients. I will advocate for them even when complex conditions, inconclusive results and stereotypes discourage them from seeking continued care; work with them to continually adapt and improve an individualized plan tailored to their needs and goals, and engage in pioneering research and medical innovations that can directly benefit them.

Reflecting on the support system that enabled me to overcome the challenges of rehabilitation, I was inspired to help others navigate life with chronic pain in a more equitable and accessible way. Not everyone has the means to work indefinitely with a comprehensive care team, but most do have a smartphone. As a result, I partnered with a team of physicians and physical therapists at the University of California San Francisco to develop a free mobile application that guides individuals dealing with chronic pain through recovery. Based on my own journey, I was able to design the app with an understanding of the mental and physical toll that pain, fear, and loss of motivation take on patients struggling with chronic pain. Having features like an exercise bank with a real-time form checker and an AI-based chatbot to motivate users, address their concerns and connect them to specific health care resources, our application helped 65 of the 100 pilot users experience a significant reduction in pain and improvement in mental health in three months.

My journey has fostered my passion for patient-centered incremental medicine and medical innovation. From barely living to thriving, I have become a trailblazing warrior with the perseverance and resilience needed to pursue these passions and help both the patients I engage with and those around the world.

Related posts:

• Why I Picked UC Denver
• Finding the Perfect Research Project
• How to Succeed on Medical School Interview Day
• How to Answer “What is the Biggest Healthcare Problem” During an Interview

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12 Steps to a Perfect Medical School Personal Statement (with before and after example)

Have you ever read an example med school personal statement and thought, Wow... I could never write something that good ?

That’s because you’re only seeing the finished product. Take it from me, an editor, someone who sees the essays first thing in the morning without their makeup on.

artist Stephan Schmitz - https://www.theispot.com/artist/schmitz

See all those broken plates? Those are all the personal statement rough drafts, the discarded sentences, the gutted paragraphs, all the sweat and tears of the revision process . No one sees that. They see a guy miraculously juggling five plates at once.

You’re like that juggler - trying to balance multiple things at once in your personal statement, all within certain strict limitations. And guess what? You’ll have to break a few plates before you get it right.

So… let’s break some plates (maybe some hearts and spirits too).

I invite you along to play the role of editor with me. You’ll choose your own path as we go through 12 steps of revision to perfect the personal statement.

I’ll give a “before” version of each section of an example personal statement, and you’ll have to call the 12 shots about how we make it better. Ready?

Default Outline for Personal Statement

Section 1 - hook.

Hook (BEFORE)

Step 1: Cut down on length

Step 2: Remove the negativity

Step 3: Grab More Attention

Hook (AFTER)

Section 2 - When/Why Medicine

When/Why Medicine (BEFORE)

Step 4: Remove red flags

Step 5: Connect to personal narrative

Step 6: Add more definitive “Why Medicine”

When/Why Medicine (AFTER)

Section 3 - Exposure

Exposure (BEFORE):

Step 7: Remove informal language

Step 8: Show more personal value as a candidate

Exposure (AFTER)

Optional - Explain Issues with Conduct/Grades

Section 4 - meaningful contributions.

Meaningful Contributions (BEFORE)

Step 9: Include above-and-beyond contributions

Step 10: Emphasize impact on others

Meaningful Contributions (AFTER)

Section 5 - Why You/Conclusion

Why You/Conclusion (BEFORE)

Step 11: Balance your voice with professionalism

Step 12: Add more style, cut down on summary

Why You/Conclusion (AFTER)

COMPLETE “Before” Draft

Complete “after” draft.

Don’t have the time or energy for this Do-It-Yourself project?

Then BOOK A FREE MEETING with our expert medical school advisors for more guidance. We’ve helped hundreds of students write their personal statements (including the sample below), and we’d love to help you on your writing journey!

Obviously this can vary, but let’s keep it simple:

Optional: Explain Issues with Grades/Conduct

The goal here is to grab the readers’ attention and compel them to keep reading. Ideally, the hook will pose a problem, share an unexpected challenge, or reverse the readers’ expectations about a situation.

Characteristics of a Good Hook :

* Not too long

* Grabs attention

* Initiates the plot

DIRECTIONS: Read the excerpt below and consider what changes you’d make, both big-picture and small-picture.

HOOK (BEFORE) :

Throughout high school and college, I have been supporting my family in more ways than one. My mother needed a lot of support due to her bad arthritis and physical limitations. It was not the most ideal situation, and it felt like I was living a double life. I went to a pretty good high school since my parents wanted me to have a decent education, but the kids there were protected and shielded from most inconveniences in life. Someone from my background was not very welcome. It was jarring, as vapid girls my age talked about going to equestrian classes and how they knew someone on the Yale admissions committee, while I came to school from my two-bedroom non-air-conditioned home that my family of four shared. I was a nanny at the age of 12 and would juggle taking care of 3-4 kids every week. My dad unfortunately got pretty ill during this time (brain aneurysm and subsequent recovery), so it was definitely a weird time. I got brutally harassed by a girl at school after she found out about my living situation, so I learned to form two identities. In school, I was someone who fake-laughed with people and sympathized with the horrors of a girl’s parents buying a pony she didn’t like. I pretended to act excited for another girl’s European vacation (in reality I was jealous).

Pick an aspect to fix:

Step 3: Grab more attention

Jump to the After version.

STEP 1: CUT DOWN ON LENGTH

Indeed. Currently this opener is ~1300 characters, which is disproportionate for our total space (5300 characters). Hooks should probably be around 700-800 characters instead, so that the remaining sections can have 1000+ each.

What to cut? We want it to be ~10 lines of text, so take a shot at cutting ~5-6 lines.

Your answer:

_____________________________________________________________________

My approach:

Without compromising the necessary context, you should cut anything that could go in the Disadvantaged Essay instead, especially the “facts” of the situation that don’t require much editorialization. Admissions committees read the disadvantaged essay before any of the other writing in the application.

STEP 2: REMOVE THE NEGATIVITY

This is a far more common problem than you’d think. For one, it’s hard for us to know how our tone and voice are coming across. Secondly, we sometimes write about things while they’re still “fresh wounds,” leaving room for resentment to creep in.

What’s too negative? Make a list below of the words/phrases/sentences from our sample hook that seem too negative:

fake-laughed

pretended to act excited

the horrors of a girl’s parents buying a pony she didn’t like

I can sympathize with the writer, but there’s no point in having a negative spin when you can achieve the same impact with a positive spin.

Simply mentioning one or two details like the equestrian classes will go a long way.  

STEP 3: GRAB MORE ATTENTION

Turn the whole hook into a contrast between life at home and life at school. Give it a metaphor that makes it accessible and memorable. Break it up into shorter paragraphs to make it more digestible.  

HOOK (AFTER):

Throughout high school, my life felt like a less glamorous version of Hannah Montana. While Hannah transformed into a pop star after school, I transformed into a nanny. And it wasn’t any regular babysitting job either; at my peak, I managed a gaggle of 14 kids. In one way, school was a sanctuary; there was order, cleanliness, and a schedule. After school, it was all diaper-and-tantrum-filled chaos.

The juxtaposition between home and school was also pronounced due to money. I didn’t understand my classmates’ wealth until they started talking about equestrian classes and Maseratis. Although my life was by no means fun, I chose to stay home for college since my family needed my presence. My father had a brain aneurysm when I was 14, and my family was still facing the remnants of that event.

What we’re looking for here:

* Motivations that build directly off what makes the candidate unique

* A good combination of selflessness (helping others) and self-interest (how the career will fulfill/stimulate you unlike any other)

* A nice balance of idealism and realism - neither naive nor overblown

WHEN/WHY MEDICINE (BEFORE) :

My decision to become a doctor was a culmination of events and experiences that led to an eventual realization, rather than one single revelation. When I first started at my university, I was an 18-year-old who had no clue what to do in life. For one year, I explored pharmacy and finance, but the drudgery of the work made me turn away from these professions. At the start of my second year, I decided to volunteer at the ER to see what the hospital environment was like. Looking back, this mundane decision was a godsend of exposure and clarification. I went into ER expecting to give out glasses of water and wheel patients around. But it was a lot more. I saw patients who were experiencing the worst moments of their lives, and I was beyond my comfort zone. However, I loved interacting with patients, enjoyed being in the hospital, and had a knack for talking and making people feel better.

I started the Pathfinder Internship to determine whether I wanted to be a nurse or a doctor. The first three months of the internship were at the Oncology/General Care Unit, where it was incredibly depressing. I felt so helpless seeing people die. Nurses and doctors  were mainly just keeping people alive, as most patients were already permanent victims of cancer or chronic unregulated conditions. I did the rest of my rotations at an urgent care clinic and birth center, which were way less depressing, and many times patients left feeling better. During this time, I realized the doctor’s role matched me better than a nurse; I liked how doctors had creative control to create optimal treatment plans for patients. I had already shadowed two interventional cardiologists and an orthopedic surgeon, and I knew I wanted to have a connection with patients and create medical care that suited their needs. Also, by this time, I had started my global health minor, and was learning all about preventative care, women’s health, and disparities in healthcare. The combined clinical care experiences, my interest in science, and the global health minor all came together in a beautiful way to point me into medicine.

STEP 4: REMOVE RED FLAGS

mundane decision

incredibly depressing

permanent victims

It’s good to be honest and to show that you’ve experienced medicine’s challenges, but these choices in diction will do more harm than good. Let’s nix them.

STEP 5: CONNECT TO PERSONAL NARRATIVE

Right now, section two seems to exist in isolation from our hook, so we’ll want to bring back aspects of the family situation, namely the father’s medical issues, so that we can see the narrative building cohesively.

STEP 6: ADD MORE DEFINITIVE “WHY MEDICINE”

Right now, the “came together in a beautiful way” line is too vague and impressionistic. The writer would benefit from creating a more specific set of criteria that medicine can offer in a career.

Your “Why Medicine” response should not leave any holes or gaps that would tempt the reader to ask, “Why not social work?” or “Why not research?”

WHEN/WHY MEDICINE (AFTER):

After earning my way into a UC college, I dabbled in finance, pharmacy, and psychology, feeling somewhat clueless about what I wanted. Earlier, I had tentatively chosen a biochemistry major, and over time the pre-med path grew more intriguing. I decided to volunteer in the ER during my second year, a weekly commitment that allowed enough time to assist my family again when my dad lost his job. It was one of the best decisions I ever made, especially since the entire ER team went out of its way to expose me to the field. I grew to love each shift as I interacted with people, observed action-packed procedures, and worked in tandem with staff to smooth out workflow. Around this time, I shadowed cardiologists and orthopedic surgeons, and loved the atmosphere of teamwork and patient care. Medicine drew me in, but I was still unsure about what particular role I would fill.

I received the direction I needed during my Pathfinder Internship, where I first rotated in a hospice ward to help terminally ill patients. As I tried to make their passing more dignified, it reminded me of my dad’s recovery, when my family was given no clear prognosis. I knew that patience and presence of mind were key. Even if death was certain, these patients needed help maintaining normalcy. I continued to Expresscare, a small clinic which diagnosed a wide variety of underserved patients. Later on in the Birth Center, I observed OB/GYNs creating long-term and short-term solutions that fundamentally shaped patients’ lives. I wanted to be in a similar position, confidently resolving health issues while providing comfort through both knowledge and bedside manner. Whether it was ER doctors turning off a defibrillator gone awry, OB/GYNs working through unanticipated surgical challenges, or cardiologists providing long-term care, these physicians embodied the roles I wanted to play: decision maker, advocate, and trusted healer.

* A sense of your growing passions within medicine

* Some niche involvement that builds on “Why Medicine” motivations

EXPOSURE (BEFORE):

During this same time, I started my Global Health minor, and my vision became clearer. Global health involves helping those who are often ignored by medicine. I knew that medicine was not like Grey’s Anatomy or Dr. House. There are people who are left behind. I knew what it felt like to be an outsider, as I would transition from a nanny to “one of the girls” in high school and college. I knew how lonely it felt when my dad didn’t have the proper insurance during his job loss, and we didn’t know what to do. My vision in medicine is to level the playing field for all people seeking medical care by doing what fulfills me the most. In the end, it all came together. Volunteering in the ER, interning through Pathfinder, and shadowing doctors helped me discover my calling.

STEP 7: REMOVE INFORMAL LANGUAGE

Make a short list of words/phrases that don’t seem appropriate:

Grey’s Anatomy

Even though the student is specifically saying medicine is NOT like these TV shows, it still seems like the wrong context or reference point, especially in relation to global health.

Mentioning pop culture versions of medicine is usually ill-advised, and this candidate can make her point just as effectively without them.

STEP 8: SHOW MORE PERSONAL VALUE AS A CANDIDATE

At this point in the essay, the candidate has already explained her motivations towards medicine, so the final few lines of this paragraph feel redundant.

We don’t have a lot of characters to spare, so she’d be better off showcasing the value of her global health minor (the skills, insights, lessons, etc.)

EXPOSURE (AFTER):

My rotations at Pathfinder and ER volunteering exposed me to diverse, underserved patients, and these interactions inspired me to pursue a Global Health minor to help those marginalized by medicine. On a smaller scale, I knew what it was like to be an outsider, as I transitioned from a messy-haired, sweaty-faced nanny to “one of the girls” at school. I knew how lonely and unsettling it felt when my dad didn’t have insurance during his job loss. Global health offered avenues for putting this empathy into action and showed me the importance of solidarity, in which physicians work WITH patients, not just FOR them. The minor taught me about large-scale entities that govern and dictate the health of the masses, and the tools needed to make healthcare more attainable. The minor also instilled cultural competence, responsibility, and social justice.

This did not apply for this student, but it might for YOU(?).

Want to know the most tactful way to explain that bad semester, your MCAT struggles, or other such snafus?

* Tangible value of your insights and experiences within medicine

* Your ability to leave things better than you found them

MEANINGFUL CONTRIBUTIONS (BEFORE):

My interest in providing culturally competent care and helping marginalized people in medicine helped me during an Expresscare shift when I eased the fears of an undocumented teenager who thought he might have HIV after one of his several partners was infected. It felt empowering to explain STDs, safe sex, HIV, and PreP/Truvada, all in order to help the NP determine a course of action. I loved advocating for patients who didn’t have proper insurance, and felt gratified when the NP and I found another clinic where patients could receive affordable care.

STEP 9: INCLUDE ABOVE-AND-BEYOND CONTRIBUTIONS

There are two aspects that stand out as being underdeveloped: the candidate’s scope of responsibility and her above-and-beyond efforts. After some brainstorming, she was able to add meaningful details in these areas.

NOTE: this does not mean that you should create a laundry-list of all your tasks and responsibilities. It means focusing on the actions and efforts that exceeded expectations.

STEP 10: EMPHASIZE IMPACT ON OTHERS

Sometimes a paragraph needs more examples so that the one story or patient case doesn’t seem anomalous, but rather the norm for you. Giving 2-3 examples of your impact on different types of patients will show your range and ability to advocate for diverse populations.

MEANINGFUL CONTRIBUTIONS (AFTER):

This background helped me during an Expresscare shift, as I eased the fears of an undocumented teenager who thought he had HIV after his partner was infected. It felt empowering to explain STDs, safe sex, HIV, and PreP/Truvada, making the patient feel more in control. In this role, I often contacted clinics that admit uninsured patients to help others access care during vulnerable times. My global health training also helped me coach a black woman through a difficult delivery alongside nurses. Through my numerous Maternal Health classes, I knew that black women have double the maternal mortality rates in America, and case studies suggest that valid concerns are often not taken seriously. Therefore, I made sure to follow through on requests, such as taking temperature and BP when she felt feverish. I remained at her side for the last couple hours of delivery, and she said she felt safe knowing someone was there for her. As a physician, I will implement these valuable lessons in my future practice to make every patient feel as safe and cared for as possible.

* Stylistic callback to the intro and themes

* Reiteration of biggest reasons admissions committees should choose you

WHY YOU/CONCLUSION (BEFORE):

In the end, my path in deciding to pursue medicine, especially a medical career that focuses on the medically underserved, was a culmination of years of life experience and exploration into the field. It started as a love of basic science, which led to choosing biochemistry and cell biology as a major. The ER volunteering gig introduced me to clinical medicine, and the Palomar internship confirmed that becoming a physician was my calling. My experiences as an outsider, and a person who had to juggle multiple lifes challenges, made me especially sensitive to those who are marginalized and overwhelmed, inspiring me to pursue a career in medicine that focuses on bringing care to marginalized folks.

STEP 11: BALANCE YOUR VOICE WITH PROFESSIONALISM

volunteering gig

marginalized folks

*my calling

Normally, there’s nothing wrong with ‘gig’ and ‘folks,’ but they seem a bit colloquial for a personal statement. Again, the candidate could communicate the same message without these words, so it’s not worth using diction that could be misconstrued.

*Although ‘my calling’ isn’t too informal, it’s a rather cliche phrase that might make the admissions committees recoil in disgust.

STEP 12: ADD MORE STYLE, CUT DOWN ON SUMMARY

This is a common problem for conclusions. In school, we’re taught that the conclusion should merely summarize the main points of the essay. But that’s short-sighted and ultimately pretty boring. Yes, you need to reiterate certain aspects, but you should use stylistic callbacks when doing so.

Another common problem is candidates spending too much time restating “Why Medicine” reasons, rather than emphasizing what THEY can bring to the table. The key is to sell yourself without sounding full of yourself .

WHY YOU/CONCLUSION (AFTER):

Although my Nanny Montana days are behind me, this experience has helped me empathize with patients who are forced to manage multiple obligations and move between differing realities. I have experiences from across the healthcare spectrum, as both a loved one of an uninsured patient and a scholar looking to improve conditions for all in the long-term. My background as an outsider, who had to juggle multiple life challenges, made me especially sensitive to the marginalized and overwhelmed, inspiring me to pursue a career in medicine that focuses on empowering others and protecting their well-being.

So, at this point, we’ve changed the essay in 12 different ways - 12 broken plates, if you will. And really, each of these changes required a few iterations, so you can multiply those plates by two or three.

Yes, it’s a messy process, but it results in a beautiful presentation - an essay that successfully juggles all of its primary goals.

Remember: we can help. BOOK A FREE MEETING with our expert medical school advisors for more guidance.

Feel free to leave questions in the comments section below, and we’ll respond to you personally! Best of luck with your personal statement drafts!

Add-On: Explaining Issues with Grades/Conduct

Need to explain some elephant in the room to the admissions committees? Follow this sentence-by-sentence outline, and you’ll be just fine (or as fine as you can be!).

1-2 sentences to explain the factors that led to the issue

It's wise to let the facts speak for themselves. If there were extenuating circumstances that led to this anomalous blip in your record, make sure to include those as evidence, BUT DON'T editorialize or try to make excuses for what happened. The goal in the beginning is to just acknowledge and own up to the failure/mistake.

1-2 sentences to explain how you've rectified the issue

This will depend a lot on your situation, but typically, it will involve some kind of additional tutoring, office hours, retaken classes, better time-management, etc. It might involve probation. Beyond explaining the requirements you fulfilled and your upward trend in grades, discuss the ways you've sought to improve overall as a person.

1-2 sentences to explain the growth, personal qualities, and lessons you’ve gained

Again, this will depend a lot on your situation. Perhaps there's some activity or endeavor that you can use as "proof" of your growth as a person (i.e. tutoring other struggling students or serving on the student judiciary board). If not, just explain what you learned from the experience and how it's turned you into a better person moving forward.

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3 Tips for writing an excellent med school personal statement

We’ve all been there. You’re looking at a blank page, paralyzed at the idea of writing the most important essay of your life: the infamous medical school personal statement. You’re anxious, tired, and burnt out. Each day, the application deadline creeps a bit closer.  

You're not alone! Everyone goes through that feeling. This simple guide is built just for you to get over that hump and be on your way to writing the best personal statement to ever grace the admissions committee’s desk.

1. Write with abandon.

Open an empty Word document. Take out your phone and set a timer for ten minutes. For the next ten minutes, you are not allowed to stop typing. Ready? Set. Go!

It doesn’t matter if you end up typing out a soliloquy on Stephen Curry’s greatest three-point shot (February 27th, 2016 against the Oklahoma City Thunder, in my humble opinion) or if you’re listing out the elements of the periodic table in alphabetical order. Don’t. Stop. Writing.

Ninety percent of what you write you’ll never use again. But, in the process of writing, your mind will start to wander over why you are choosing medicine. What exactly about the field draws you in? What stories and memories shaped you into the aspiring doctor you are?

And there you have it. A the end of the ten minutes, you'll find a lead. Now, keep writing.  

2. Find your X factor.

What is the ‘x factor’ that makes you stand out? Whether it’s wet lab research, a focus on community health, or a passion for education, your statement must convey this.

Now, it can be difficult to tease out your ‘x factor’. Here’s a simple exercise to jump-start that process of self-discovery: I want you to write your elevator pitch for yourself to all the admissions officers out there. Don’t focus on the accolades or the GPA. Write about yourself. Your personality. Your dreams. Your experiences. Keep it tight, a few sentences max.

Now read that over. Did you find an ‘x factor’? If not, try again. I assure you it will come out over a few iterations.

3. Everyone is wrong and everyone is right.

One problem I often see is a student who’s sent their drafted essays to ten different friends. Each of them has great intentions and wants their friend to succeed. They edit the essays and send the back. Oh no! The student is overwhelmed when they realize that all the edits disagree with each other. Does this sound familiar?

Remember, a personal statement is a body of writing. Writing is, at the end of the day, subjective. There is better and there is definitely worse, but there is no perfect in writing a personal statement. There are simply the experiences you have and the way you package them.

Do not get overwhelmed if you have feedback that disagrees with each other. Look at why the feedback disagrees. What was the purpose behind each edit? If you agree with their reasoning and their edit, take their advice. If you don’t, then try to understand where you disagree. That’ll help you better understand the story you want to tell and how you want to tell it.

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Early pregnancy in schools: a socio-ecological analysis of the determinants among teenage girls in Koudougou, Burkina Faso

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Introduction: Early pregnancy among adolescents in school has several consequences on the adolescent herself, her family, the whole community, and the child-to-be. This article explores the factors determining early pregnancy among 15-19-year-old secondary school students in Koudougou in Burkina Faso. Methods: A descriptive and exploratory qualitative study was conducted through focus groups with adolescents and youth in schools and individual interviews with parents, teachers, health workers, and community leaders. The socio-ecological model guided all stages of the study. A thematic analysis of the recorded and transcribed data was conducted using Nvivo 12 software. Results: A lack of knowledge and information and wrong perceptions about sexuality at the individual level; peer pressure and poverty at the interpersonal level; lack of awareness among teachers and students and health workers' attitudes at the organizational level; the influence of new information technologies or the media and parents' irresponsibility at the community level; and the insufficient of sexual and reproductive health services for adolescents as well as the lack of sanctions and law against early pregnancy at the political level were found as enablers. Barriers were the use of contraceptive methods and sexual abstinence; parents-children communication; teachers' training on sexual sensitization; the creation of youth centers on school campuses and the introduction of sexual education courses; education through media and religion; willingness to introduce sexual education courses in school curricula and legal sanctioning of dealing and consuming drugs in schools. Conclusion: The study highlighted that the problem of early pregnancy in schools can be solved by implementing preventive strategies by acting on the determinants at all levels of the socioecological model. Keywords: early pregnancy, adolescents, enablers, barriers, secondary schools

Competing Interest Statement

The authors have declared no competing interest.

Funding Statement

This study did not receive any funding

Author Declarations

I confirm all relevant ethical guidelines have been followed, and any necessary IRB and/or ethics committee approvals have been obtained.

The details of the IRB/oversight body that provided approval or exemption for the research described are given below:

Ethical approval was obtained from the Burkina Faso Health Research Ethics Committee (CERS); number: 2021-12-288.

I confirm that all necessary patient/participant consent has been obtained and the appropriate institutional forms have been archived, and that any patient/participant/sample identifiers included were not known to anyone (e.g., hospital staff, patients or participants themselves) outside the research group so cannot be used to identify individuals.

I understand that all clinical trials and any other prospective interventional studies must be registered with an ICMJE-approved registry, such as ClinicalTrials.gov. I confirm that any such study reported in the manuscript has been registered and the trial registration ID is provided (note: if posting a prospective study registered retrospectively, please provide a statement in the trial ID field explaining why the study was not registered in advance).

I have followed all appropriate research reporting guidelines, such as any relevant EQUATOR Network research reporting checklist(s) and other pertinent material, if applicable.

Data Availability

All data produced in the present work are contained in the manuscript

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